Amy Oneshots
by A Scribbler
Summary: A series of one-shot fics that include my OC Amy. Will include a description of the fic at the start of each and will sometimes contain ZaGr as well as DaAr Dib and Amy . There will aslo be a pointer of when each fic is set, not to get confused or anything. More description inside, Enjoy XD T for my paranoia
1. Smeet Sitting

**A/N:**

**Okay, I've made a few one-shots that include or refer to my OC character Amy. A few were just prompts for future stores but ended up working really well as one-shots. If you have any ideas, please let me know in a review or PM and I'll see what I can do. Now this will include moments of ZAGR as well as some DAAR (Dib and Amy romance) so don't like, don't mind XD It will always say complete because I don't know how many are going to be on here. Also, there will be a description of each story and when it was set before each one-shot. Hope you enjoy and review XD **

**Zim has been working on a new machine and naturally, Dib wants to figure out what it is, dragging Amy and Gaz along with him. But what happens when the machine goes out of control and zaps a few members of the groups. Now Amy is stuck looking after three helpless friends, with only GIR for help! Set a few weeks after the events of "An Adventure of my Own"**

"Dib," I whispered from our hiding place behind the fence in the front garden of the odd house, "Why are we here again?"

He rolled his eyes, "Simple. I was spying on Zim with the camera's I set up in his labs, and saw that he was working on some sort of machine that involves waffle-mix. You remember I pointed out he bought four more packets than normal? And I know it has something to do with enslaving man-kind! I mean, granted he doesn't work for the Tallest anymore and his mission was a lie and whatnot, but man I know he's up to _something_! And we're gonna find out what! Maybe it's a machine that will -"

And the tangent was off! I looked at my watch, hmm, it started a good six seconds later than normal, but at least he finished explaining before it started. Oh great, now he was reaching the stage where he was talking mostly to himself than me. I looked out from our hiding place and smiled, slightly bemused at the sight before me.

"Okay!" I interjected, "Shouldn't we get a move on?"

He arched his brow, "Why the rush?"

"Because your sister's just walked right past us and into the house."

His eyes widened and he jumped up to his feet, sprinting past the gnomes and hammering his fist on the front door of the aliens' house. I followed after, smirking slightly at the urgency in his eyes. Come to think of it, why was Gaz here? Weird.

The door swung open to reveal a little green dog, beaming up at us. Dib ignored it and stormed right inside. I rolled my eyes and stepped inside, tousling the creatures head. It unzipped its front and let the costume fall away, leaving a grinning android who jumped up and wove its arms around my neck.

"Amy-Cakes!" he cried.

"Hey there GIR," I laughed, returning the hug before setting him back on the ground.

"You gots anything for me?" he asked, hands behind his back and swaying back and fore on his feet, looking hopeful.

I sighed, rummaging through my pockets until I found something that could be of use. It was a little sheet of stickers that my younger sister had given me a few days prior. I grinned, perfect! He held out his hands expectantly as the sheet was put in place. He beamed at me.

"I gonna decorate the computer downstairs!" he declared, running off into the kitchen and diving head first into the trash can.

Ignoring the random act, my attention turned to the violet haired girl sitting on the sofa, G.S.2 in hand and ignoring her brother completely as he ranted before her.

"…Why are you even here?" he finished, gasping for air.

She raised a single eyebrow, "Well usually I end up having to drag you home, so I figured I'd come down now, save me some time and energy."

"You know that's not a bad idea…" I pondered out loud, receiving a tired glance from Dib, "Well, we're here now, so shall we get moving or are we just going to give lectures?"

His mouth opened like he was going to argue, an accusing finger darting to point at me then Gaz and back again, finally, he deflated and flicked a hand, "Lead the way…"

I grinned triumphantly at him and turned on my heel, walking into the kitchen. A snigger escaped me as Dib tip-toed, flattening his back against the wall and edging along to peer cautiously around the corner. Gaz and I paused to watch as he dived to the floor into a tuck-and-roll and flatted against the side of the trash can. He kicked it open with his foot and peered inside. He beckoned us with his hand and seemed somewhat dejected by the way we just casually walked over to him. Gaz rolled her eyes and stepping inside first and vanishing from view.

"It doesn't hurt to be on guard." He muttered.

I placed a hand on his shoulder comfortingly, "Sure, and it did look pretty cool."

He smirked at me, unsure if I was mocking him or not. My smile mirrored his and his cheeks turned slightly rosy. He turned away and stepped in after his sister. As soon as he was out of sight, I followed after. The air whistled past me as the tube carried me downwards into the labs. My feet hit the floor with a thud, buckling my knees and sending my falling flat onto my stomach. Dib stooped down to help me up. We looked around and instantly knew where to go by the sound of bellowing laughter coming from around the corner in a separate alcove. Gaz was already casually leaning against the wall, looking more bored than anything else. Dib and I joined her, peering around the corner cautiously.

Zim was standing before a large machine that was sparking threateningly, making his shadow quiver against the far wall. He was pouring packets of what I presumed was the infamous waffle-mix into an open cavity.

"GIR!" he cried, making me jump.

The robot fell down from the ceiling, his neon eyed hidden behind layers and layers of stickers that I'd given him. He grinned and got to his feet, facing away from his master and saluted.

"Hi!" he waved.

Zim turned him around the right way, "GIR, the machine is almost ready and I'll need a test subject. Soon, the entire human race will be under my control, learning how to obey their true master, they will be nothing more than a quivering lump of… GIR? Why are you blinded by stickers?"

GIR shrugged, "Amy-Cakes gave them to me."

I froze, Dib tensed next to me, using his arm to pull me back slightly. Zim narrowed his eyes and smiled wryly.

"And where is the Amy-worm now?"

"With Mary-Dib and Gazzie." He answered innocently.

Zim huffed, "Which is where?"

GIR shrugged, "I dunno, I can't see."

Zim smirked, his eyes brightening, "And what do you notice most about the Dib-monkey, GIR?"

I didn't like where this was going. Zim had that glint in his maroon eyes that signalled the start of an idea, which was never really a good thing. GIR tilted his head in thought before jumping on the spot, positive that he'd gotten the right answer.

"He gots a big head!"

"My head's not -"

My hand clamed down over Dib's mouth as he raised his voice to protest against the comment. Zim snapped his head towards up and grinned devilishly. He snapped his fingers and a long metal tube swooped down from the ceiling and snaked around our waists, pulling us together in a vice-like grip. I ended up sandwiched between my companions. Gaz and I back to back while Dib had his chest pressed against mine. I reddened slightly but there wasn't much time to take notice as we were hoisted into the air and left to hover in front of the smug alien.

"Well, Zim wishes for one test subject, and three turn up at once." He smirked.

"But you already did tests." GIR pointed out, actually pointing at the wall.

"Yes, but the effects didn't last that long. I've made some modifications since then." He turned back to us, "Now, who's first?"

"You won't get away with this Space-lizard! Now tell us what that machine does!"

"Actions speak louder than words, Dib-worm. I think I'll take great pleasure in starting with you."

He struggled, only resulting in making him and I press closer together, "Come on Zim, you really think this is going to scare us?"

Zim tapped his chin in thought before shrugging, "Actually, yes."

The tube unravelled, sending my vision blurring as I span out of control and landing in a heap. Zim grabbed Dib by the hair and held him in place. Gaz ducked to the side out of reach and leant against a crate in the corner, not really interested in taking part to help her brother or be a subject. Zim lunged to try and grab me, but I rolled out of the way and jumped to by feet. GIR, hearing but not seeing the commotion, got excited and started running around in circles, screaming wildly and throwing his arms in the air. Another set of tubes swooped down and tried to grab at me. I managed to avoid them, but one swiped at me, sending me skidding across the floor. My eyes clenched in pain and I heard another cry from GIR. There was a yell of anger from Zim, a yelp of panic from Dib, and a blinding flash that filled the room. Cowering away from it, I managed to duck behind the corner that we'd been spying from moments ago. My hands clamped over my eyes and the heat coming from behind me was near unbearable. Then, everything was deadly silent.

Slowly, I pushed myself up and peeked around the corner. Apart from GIR, the place was empty of all signs of life. Dib, Zim and Gaz were gone.

"GIR, what did you do?" I asked, trying to stop my voice from shaking.

He finally peeled off a few stickers to look at me, "Nothing…"

"And how did that nothing happen?"

He pointed at the machine, "I think I hit it, and then things went bright… like a shiny! Where'd masta go?"

I was about to answer when I realised, I had no answer. But my rapidly approaching thoughts of panic were interrupted by a muffled whimper. I looked down and gasped at the sight of crumpled clothes at my feet. The black jeans, the trench coat, the blue shirt… Had Dib been vaporised leaving only his clothes? No, there was something moving inside them. A little lump. I stepped back nervously and peered down.

From the neck of the shirt, came a little pink lump with a tuft of spiked black hair. It turned to look up at me blankly with coffee coloured eyes, comically magnified by the glasses that were now way to big for its head. It gurgled a little and tried to crawl out some more, its arms padding along the floor. Across the room, there was a whine from another pile of clothes. This time, a small green creature was grunting as it got tangled in the invader uniform, a single tooth poking over his quivering lips. Behind me a violet haired creature similar to the first one looked at me with wide amber eyes, head dropped down by the sudden weight of a skull pendant. My eyes widened in horror, my back flattening against the wall in shock. Oh, My. God.

GIR grinned and scooped up the green one, cradling it softly, "Awe! They cute little babies! Where'd babies come from?"

I quickly checked myself over in panic. No, I was still me, fully clothes and at the right age. The little Dib managed to break free of the giant clothes and was now scuttling towards me, a curious look in his eyes.

"C-computer?" I stammered, hoping this would work.

**What?** It groaned sarcastiacally.

"What happened?" I asked.

**The machine went off, duh…**

"Well, yeah… And why weren't me and GIR changed?"

**He's a robot and you were out of the way. Bye.**

"No, no wait!" I begged, "How do I change them back! Zim said the last test didn't last long, how long will this last?"

**Can't be bothered telling you."**

"Please! If you tell me how to change them back, I promise I'll leave you alone!"

The was a pause, my heart was hammering against my chest. This was so wrong! Three little babies, barely able to crawl looked at me curiously. It was so much to take in.

**Fine… Well, it's Zim, so his invention was never really going to work, now was it? It should last about 24 hours and then they'll be back to normal. Bye!**

"And what do I do with them till then?" I squeeked.

**Not my problem, and a promise is a promise. Bye, for the last time!**

It already sounded like it had shut itself off so talking would have made no difference. Baby Dib patted my foot, I looked down then instantly back upwards as I remembered the he had shrunken right out of his clothes. Gingerly, I stepped over him and picked up the blue shirt before gingerly wrapping him up in it and lifting him up to eye-level.

"Dib? Can you understand me?" I asked nervously.

He looked at me, his large eyes not able to focus on one part of me for very long before looking elsewhere. I asked him again. His head tilted to the side and he let out a little gurgle. I sighed and moved him so that I was cradling him.

"I guess not then…" I moaned.

Holding him close, his eyes started to droop and he nuzzled into me, breathing softly. I looked at GIR desperately who was swaying baby Zim back and fore. Irkens didn't sleep, so GIR was fighting a loosing battle there… Gaz had thankfully stayed put, wriggling out of her heavy pendant and wrapped herself up in her dress. I groaned; this was so not what I had planned for today. 24 hours! I couldn't take care of three toddlers for that amount of time! And one wasn't even human!

"Amy-Cakes!" GIR cried, "Little masta bit me!"

I sighed, "Just… take him upstairs into the living room, I'll be up with these two in a minute.

As GIR vanished into the elevator with Zim, I stooped down and scooped up Gaz, dress and all into my free arm while her brother snoozed on. All the way back up the lift, she just stared at me with amber eyes, questioning me. It was really unnerving. Did I comfort her in baby-talk or just talk like I normally would and expect her to understand. From what I'd seen, it wasn't just their bodies that had reversed, it was their minds too. Back in the living room, I lay Dib on the sofa where he curled up and stuck a thumb in his mouth. I paused, I had to admit, it was damn adorable. Shaking myself mentally, I looked away and lay Gaz down next to him, rolling up the sleeves of her dress and knotting the hem so that her arms and legs were free from getting tangled again.

She toddled onto the floor and shuffled over to Zim, wrapped in his baggy leggings of his uniform, who looked at her carefully with wide magenta eyes. She babbled something before flimsily smacking his arm. The smeet stared in shock before grinning, revealing his single tooth and pushing her so that she fell onto her rear. She pushed back and it seemed to become a game for them.

"Okay…" I muttered, "Whatever passes the time for you."

I sank down on the sofa, elbows on my knees and head slumped into my hands. I couldn't go for help, it would raise questions and that would cause more trouble. No, I'd just have to wait out the 24 hours. I gave my mum a text telling her that I was staying the night with Gaz (she still wasn't happy with me sleeping over a boys house) and tried to figure out what to do for the next day. GIR leant over the arm of the sofa and stroked the spike in Dib's hair.

"Awe, he still gots a big head!" he cooed.

Dib snapped his eyes open and rolled over so that he was glaring at GIR. Oh sure, he doesn't understand plain English but he understands _that_! Wow and I thought I was over-sensitive. Dib pushed himself up shakily and started patting my lap with his chubby little arms, testing out the material on my jeans and seemingly fascinated by them.

"This is your own fault, you know." I said, Dib not paying any attention to me, "Don't try and act cute to get out of it."

He ignored me. Leaning down to rub his cheek against my knee, liking the new feel to it. I fought the urge to gush, but it was so cute! No, he wasn't cute! He was a baby and babies generally are cute. It's not him specifically. Oh god this was so wrong!

"Okay, you can go play now."

I adjusted the shirt so that it fitted him like a baggy playsuit and put him on the floor with the others. Gaz and Zim were still going at their game of taking turns shoving one another. They both eyed the newcomer curiously. Dib toddled over and looked up at Zim's antenna. He reached up and grabbed one, experimenting with the feel of it. Zim shoot the human away and in return snatched the glasses from his face and placing them in front of his own ruby eyes. He squeaked as his eyes magnified and blurred out of focus before falling on his back. I snorted with laughter, replacing the specs back onto Dib and sitting the smeet back up again.

Gaz had been watching them and now curiosity was taking its toll on her. She reached up and gave his antenna a sharp tug. He winced and grabbed a handful of her hair, pulling is harshly. She only reacted by pulling harder on his head. Dib chuckled and thus received a pinch on the arm from the alien.

"Hey! No, that's enough!" I snapped, lifting Zim away and tapping him in the place where his nose would be, "No. Naughty!"

He blinked in surprise, looking at me as if I was his new worst enemy, which I probably was. A sense of amusement washed over me. I'd just scolded the 'almighty' Zim! He took a swipe at me with his bare claw which I easily avoided. I held him out at arms length and gave him a stern look. He looked at me from head to toe, sizing me up. His Irken nature must have told him to back down because he relaxed a little, letting out a passive babble.

"Oh I get it, you think I'm your Tallest now?" I smirked, placing him back on the floor, "Yeah… I'm in charge, so play nice, got it?"

For a moment, he looked up at me with a look of pure innocence on his face. That was, until he swatted his arm outwards to smack Dib on the back of the head, still keeping perfect eye contact with me. I pointed at him accusingly, to which he just quirked his antenna. I sighed. This was going to be a long 24 hours…

* * *

"Gaz, Dib! Let go of Zim's antenna right now!... Zim if you don't get your PAK legs out of Dib's ear I swear I'm going to give you a time out!… Dib get out from under the sofa!... Zim I'm serious, put the PAK legs away! Gaz stop trying to get to the kitchen, it's not safe!... GIR please will you get down from the ceiling and help me!"

They didn't stop! It was never ending! Don't get me wrong, I'd had plenty of experience with children. I had over twenty cousins all younger than me, and my little sister too and because I was the eldest I usually ended up looking after them all at birthdays and Christmas and stuff… but this was ridiculous! It wasn't like I was expecting them to sit quietly for the full 24 hours, that was just stupidity, but I didn't know they were going to be this bad! I turned around and instantly felt the need to cover my eyes.

"Zim put your clothes back on!" I snapped, "GIR? How long now?"

GIR looked at a clock that was on the wall then back at me, "Blue. Oh… I dunno."

"Thanks." I groaned sarcastically.

* * *

I looked out of the window and noticed that it was starting to get darker. Gaz was sitting on my lap, batting at my necklace that hung around my neck. Through the loose dress I felt her stomach rumbling. She looked down at the noise and wasn't sure what to make of it. Even at this age she raised an eyebrow sarcastically.

"Alright then, time for food, I think." I smiled, placing her on the floor.

I told GIR to watch them and made my way into the kitchen and searched through the cupboards. I'd learnt enough about Irken anatomy to figure out they their diet needed lots of carbs and sugars. I found a large bag of sugar and put it to the side. I'd just have to add a load of that to whatever else was here. Now, what else was here? Wait, potatoes? Seriously? Well, they were basically nothing but carbs, and they were a vegetable, so that was good. I found a pan and filled it with water. The cooker fired up and I started boiling them up so make them really soft.

Wait… Things were too quiet. What was going on? What had happened? Who died? I rushed into the room and found the three sitting in front of the TV, a creepy looking monkey flashing on screen every now and again between other little colourful clips. On the sofa, GIR sat grinning and pointing at the TV.

"It's the scary monkey show!" he declared.

I watched as the three toddlers stared at the screen, wide eyed in awe, "Seriously, they'll beat the crud out of each other for no reason and then just sit there when this is on? This just makes me worry about the next generation, greatly."

Leaving them to it, I returned to the kitchen and mashed the potatoes and dished them out into three small dishes, leaving some left over for me later. While they cooled down, I sat the three on the sofa in position ready to eat. I put a dish in front of Gaz and was about to pick the first spoonful up for her when she snatched it out of my hands and started feeding herself.

"Okay… you do that then."

I sighed, turning my attention to Zim while GIR tended to Dib. I held the food up to him, he inspected it carefully and pursed his lips together stubbornly. Nothing was making him open his mouth. His stomach was growling loudly and he looked ready to start tearing up, so why wasn't he eating? I even ate a bit to convince him, but that just made him look disgusted at me. Then I clicked. I returned to the kitchen and mixed some sugar in with it. This time, I held the food up to his lips. He let his worm-like tongue slither out and inspect it. He gave a small smile and opened wide.

"There's a good smeet." I said softly, stroking his antenna as a reward.

"Amy-Cakes! Dibby don't like it! Look-it!" GIR waved the spoon in the air, "Here comes the air-plane!"

Dib furrowed his brow and turned his head away. Gaz looked at her brother and rolled her eyes, returning to her food. I smirked, if I knew Dib like I thought I did, this was going to be easy. I took the spoon from GIR and instead of waving it around, I made it bob u[ and down, getting closer each time.

"Here comes the space-ship!" I chuckled as Dib beamed and opened his mouth, swallowing the food greedily. I eyed him suspiciously, "Dib, you can understand me, can't you?"

He looked at me with his soft eyes and babbled something at me. Yes, he did understand me! Maybe this was starting to wear off? Oh thank god, this was going to be so much easier now. Then, out of no where, I received a handful of potato right between the eyes.

"Right," I sighed as he started clapping, "Still a little way to go then?"

* * *

It was starting to get really dark by this point and the two human children were slouched against one another from fatigue. Zim poked them, curious as to why they had become so boring. Dib swatted him away, but the smeet was relentless. Soon Dib had a handful of antenna while Zim was gnawing on the spike in the child hair. Gaz moaned and started pounding her little fist on the floor, fruitlessly trying to make them stop. I sighed and scooped her up, laying her in my arms and swaying from side to side.

"GIR, sort those two out while I get Gaz to sleep, please?" I begged, tiredness starting to take its toll on me too.

GIR flashed scarlet for a moment and saluted before fading back to teal and actually joining in the fight instead of separating it. I was about to step in when I thought, it's not fair on Gaz, get her to sleep before things got worse. I wrapped her dress around her and rested her head in the crook of my arm, swaying back and fore.

"You know, you've been a bigger help than GIR today," I smiled, "Try and keep it up tomorrow, okay?"

Her eyes dropped and it didn't seem like she was even aware of me anymore. Soon, her arm fell to her side and her breathing steadied, sleep finally taking over her. I looked around for a place to put her and ended up just laying her down among the cushions on the sofa. I looked down at Dib, his eyes heavy and irritable. Zim had been taken off somewhere by GIR, and that was perfectly fine with me. I'd worry about him later.

Right now, I was swaddling Dib in his black trench coat and cradling him close to me like I had done with his sister. Unlike her though, he resisted comfort and wriggled, glaring at me. I held firm and tapped him on the nose, making him blink in shock.

"Sleep now, okay, it's been a long day for both of us." He leaned over to look into the other room, I smirked, "The alien will still be there in the morning, I promise!"

He grunted in effort, trying to escape me. I giggled, he reminded me of when my sister had been like this, refusing to sleep. Hmm, I wonder if that will work… I remembered a trick I used to do that would get any baby in my family off to sleep in seconds. I lifted him a little higher so that his head was closer to my heartbeat, and swayed from side to side. My free hand rested gently against his chest, smoothing under his chin softly. I started to hum, not any tune in particular, but softly and gently, not really making much noise at all. His little hands clenched around my fingers curiously, distracting him from wriggling away. Slowly, his head started to lean into me, pressing his ear against where my heart was beating. For a moment, he looked up at me with a look of glee on his face before his eyes started to droop. In a state of semi-consciousness, he lifted the knuckle of my hand to his mouth and started nibbling gently like it was a pacifier. I could help but smile. I softly placed a kiss on his forehead before removing his glasses and laying him down next to his sister.

This was where I would have loved to go to sleep myself. But there was still one little person that needed my attention, and he did not sleep. I groaned inwardly and went into the kitchen where Zim was sitting atop of GIR's head and using the robots antenna to steer him to the left and right. I picked him up and we eyed each other.

"So, what am I going to do with you?" I asked.

He gurgled at me and tilted his head to the side.

"Really?" I smiled, pretending that I understood him, "Too bad, Zimmers, my rules tonight. OW!" He had ducked his head to sink his single tooth into my arm, I pulled away and pointed at him warningly, "I don't care if you're teething, bite me again and I swear I'll bite you back!"

I bared my teeth for effect. His eyes widened and his bottom lip started to quiver. Guilt washed over me and I pulled him close so that his head rested against my shoulder.

"Okay, I didn't mean it, calm down." I froze and narrowed my eyes as I felt sudden pain in mu shoulder-blade, "You're so lucky you're cute…"

I prised him from my neck and set him on the floor in the living room. Ignoring the pulsing pain in my neck, I lay on the floor and tried to get comfy. Wow I was so tired! But I had to stay awake to watch Zim. Curse those Irkens and their non-existent sleep! Zim watched me curiously as my eyes started to droop. He scuttled over and prodded my wound. I winced, hissing from the slight pain. He flinched away from the sound and looked closer at it.

"Yeah, you did that." I mumbled, too tired to feel guilty.

He tilted his head at me and gave me another prod to make sure that it still hurt. It did. Then, something that took me by total surprise, he pulled himself up against the side of the sofa and pointed at the two humans. I shook my head, not wanting him to wake them up. He glared at me and pointed again. I sighed and gave in, lifting him up to them. He eyed them cautiously for a second before laying down in between the siblings, snuggling up in the mass of clothes and cushions.

"So, it's like that now, is it?" I asked sceptically.

I wasn't going to question it, if he was willing to lay there for the night and pretend to sleep, that was fine with me. I grabbed a pillow and lay on the floor to sleep. The sounds of their soft breathing soothed me. Slowly, my eyes started to close...

* * *

The brightness of the sun made me awaken. Instinctively, my eyes snapped open to search for my three charges. Panic swept though me. Where were they? Were they okay? What had happened to them? Oh no they were gone! Oh god, where are… Oh… well that's cute…

As I'd jumped to my feet in sheer terror that something bad had happened to them, something caught my eye. The three were sitting in the corner, back to their shoving games. But where Dib had gone to take a swing at the alien, Zim had caught his fist and was now examining the child's hand curiously. Zim looked at the five peachy digits and then down at his three green ones. He lifted Dibs palm to his own and pressed their hands together, looking at the contrasts with wide eyes. Dib blinked and snatched his hand away, looking down at his own hand in wonder. Zim looked at Gaz and lifted her hand to his in the same way. Only this time, she pressed her palm into his in return. They locked eyes. Zim peered closer, looking into her white, amber and black spheres then reaching up to trace his ruby orbs. He looked a little deflated and twisted his arm to feel his PAK, noticing that his companions didn't have one either. Gaz pulled his antenna and then reached up to pull her own hair. They both made a little whimper of pain, to which Zim looked surprised. He copied her, inflicting pain on himself then on her. He smiled a little after finding this one similarity between them. He turned and started to pull on Dib's hair, leaning forwards and allowing the human to tug on his antenna. Dib looked confused, but followed up on the invite, grinning.

I smirked, "This is what you chose to agree on?"

"Little masta still little masta?" asked GIR from behind the sofa.

"Yep."

"Awe…" he grinned, waving at the three.

They all turned to look at us and babbled. I shook my head in bemusement and left them to it. I looked at the clock, surely it wasn't that much longer until they changed back? My heart started pumping in fear. What if they didn't change back? What if they were stuck like this? Or if they were forced to age from this point on? I couldn't explain this and I was in no position to raise three toddlers! Especially if one wasn't human, Zim would be too vulnerable out there! And Dib would be thinking of me as his mother not his… friend. Gaz, it looked like she would be okay, but for how long? The three seemed to sense my discomfort and had scuttled over to look up at me with expectant eyes.

"I'm fine." I told them, not that they could understand, "Everything's going to be fine."

I went into the kitchen and started to make up some more food from what I would find in the kitchen. All of a sudden, there was a series of cried from the living room. I dropped what I was doing and rushed back into the room, preparing myself for the worse. GIR was jumping on the sofa, laughing manically. I looked around to see what was so funny and felt my jaw hit the floor.

Stood before me, were Dib, Zim and Gaz, back at their normal heights and ages. Only, where they had shrunken out of their clothes before, now they were back to normal… Gaz was pretty covered up, having never really left her dress so all she had to do was roll down the hem and sleeves. Zim however, had just been in his leggings, so from his waist upwards was completely bare. A few thin scars were lined here and there, no doubt from his Irken training and he was surprisingly toned. And yes, I did catch Gaz looking. Dib however was a different story. He had been draped in only his blue T-shirt which had been like a dress on his baby-self. Now, however, it fitted perfectly, leaving his hips downwards exposed. My jaw clenched and my hands snapped up to my eyes to cover them. I so should not have seen that! He looked down and his eyes bulged in horror, his hands swiping for his coat to wrap around his lower half.

"You meddlesome human!" Zim spat, "You just had to go an interfere didn't you!"

"Hey, it was your fault for building such a stupid machine in the first place!" Dib snapped, "I mean, serious, you thought _that_ plan was going to work?

I peeked my eyes open when I was sure it was safe, and sighed at the pair of them. Honestly, you take care of them as best you can and then it's like you don't exist. Oh god I was starting to sound like my mum! Must not make a 'they grow up so fast' joke!

"If you dare put me through that again and I'll send you both into a pool of suffering that will drag you down into infinite darkness." Gaz snarled, her hands forming into fists.

"Awe you were so cute and little and AWE!" GIR giggled, forming his arms as if he was cradling them again.

"It was pretty cute seeing the three of you all cwtch on the sofa." I smirked.

They shuddered at the word. They'd heard me use it before. It was welsh slang for a snuggle/hug/cuddle all rolled into one.

Dib glared at the alien, "You're so going to pay for this!"

"Oh sure, Dib-worm, like that will happen!"

"Okay, that's enough!" I snapped, "If you're not going to play nice, you are not going to play at all so both of you back away and stop messing around, now!"

The both just looked at me. Dib cleared his throat, "Uh, Amy, you know we're not babies anymore, right?"

I was steamed, "Then stop acting like it then! Now get dressed."

Oh crap, forget sounding like my mum, I was turning into her! Down in the lower levels of the base, they gathered their clothes and were getting dressed. I smirked at Dib who blushed madly.

"You're an idiot, you know that?" I muttered.

"Hey, I'm not the one who put sugar on potatoes." He smirked.

"Well I…" what the hell? "What was that?"

"Nothing. Nothing at all." He stammered.

Oh that little – "You did understand me! You were completely aware of everything that was going on, weren't you?"

He backed away, "No! Well, yeah,… we knew what was going on… but it wasn't like we could control ourselves or anything!"

My eyes narrowed dangerously, "Liar! Oh my god, you threw food in my face! You tried to pull my hair and you let me talk to you like an infant! And you!" I turned to point at Zim, "You bit me! You flipping bit me!"

"Zim needed something to take the pain away, and you just happened to be there!" the alien snapped, "The human could not possibly understand the agony!"

He wasn't even denying it! "You manipulative little -!"

I lunged to take a swing at him, but my arms were pulled back by the siblings. I let myself get carried away until we were out in the front yard.

"Calm down, whiner." Gaz smirked, releasing me and walking down the sidewalk.

"Well, it's just a little annoying when I did my best to take care of you all, and all the time you could have at least let me know that you were aware of what was going on."

He swallowed, "We really couldn't control ourselves, it was like this baby haze thing took over. I'm sorry, okay?"

I looked at him, he did look genuinely sorry, and there was something in his eyes that just made me feel guilty. I wasn't even mad at them, but a little embarrassed for myself.

"That lullaby thing really worked," he added, blushing, "And you're really great with kids."

I bit my lip, trying not to laugh, "And you're a cute _kid_."

He blinked, "Hey!"

"Okay, fine, you _we're_ a cute kid. But I'm still annoyed with him, he bit me!"

"And we'll get him back." He raised an eyebrow cunningly.

"I'm listening." curiosity peeking slightly.

He looked over at my house and grinned, "Is your sister home?"

* * *

Dib and I watched from out hiding place under the window at the side of the house while my little sister knocked the front door of Zim's house. The door opened and we heard the grunt of outrage from the alien.

"Amy-sibling? You're Amy-worm is not here."

"I know." Grinned the seven year old, "But she told me that she'd be here later, so I've got to wait here for her to show up."

"Heh?"

She threw her arms affectionately around the Irkens waist and nuzzled into him, "You're babysitting me until she comes back."

Dib clamped his hand over my mouth as I was about to laugh. We could almost hear Zim grimace.

"Oh very clever human worm-children. But Zim shall get even, oh so even shall Zim get!"

"Who're you talking to?" Evie asked, "You're funny."

"Please get off of Zim…"


	2. A defect is a myth

**Two of Amy's friends from her old school are coming up to visit, and she wants them to meet the gang. There's just one thing, these twins are not like most people… Set a few months before "Birthday of Wonder and Doom".**

"Yeah, okay!" I grinned down the phone, "I can't wait! You sure you can't stay longer? Fair enough. Right, I'll meet you tomorrow. Bye!"

I jumped off of the bed that I had been sitting on while Dib was on the computer and did what was probably the most girly thing I had ever done in my life. I waved my hands in the air while jumping up and down, clenched my eyes shut and let out a shriek of glee. Dib span around on the chair to raise his eyebrows at me un unease.

"Uh… good news I take it?"

I composed myself as best I could and beamed, "Two of my best friends from school back in Wales are coming down to visit tomorrow morning and spending The day here!"

He smiled weakly, "Oh, that's… great."

Sensing his lack of enthusiasm I punched his shoulder playfully, "What's up?"

"Nothing, really, it's just…" he trailed off.

"You're meeting them too, stupid."

His eyes brightened, "Really?"

"Why wouldn't I want you to meet them?"

"Well, you know, you're kinda my only friend here…" he shrugged, "Just figured that, you'd be going off with them until they left and…"

I smiled softly at his insecurities, "Hey, I said they're my best friends from Wales. You're my best friend. Period. Actually, you're more than a best friend to me you're like my -" I quickly cut myself off.

He gave me a quizzical look, "Like your…" he left his words hang there for me to pick up.

I didn't. "Move over, I'll show you them on my online profile."

He shifted out of the way so I could have access to his computer and logged onto my account. I scanned through my pictured until I came across one of the three of us together. It had been one of the rare sunny days and we had all gone down the beach. I lay out on a towel next to another girl wearing glasses with neon green lenses, the third posed in a skimpy bathing suit, sitting in a deckchair.

"That's Bryony in the chair, and that's her twin sister Tami." I explained.

Dib scanned the picture and tilted his head, "Never seen you in a bathing suit before."

I clicked the photo away, blushing slightly, "And if I'm lucky, you never will again. So, will you come to my house tomorrow to meet them, please?"

He nodded, "Sure. So it was Tami in the chair and -"

"No, Bryony." I corrected, "Tami has the glasses. Oh, should I ask Gaz and Zim to come too?"

He jolted at my words, "Gaz yeah, but Zim? Seriously?"

"Well, I consider him a friend too, even if he isn't happy with it, and I did promise the twins that I'd introduce them to _all_ of my friends."

"Ugh, you and promises!" he moaned, rolling his eyes.

* * *

That night, after talking to Gaz about coming with us, to which she agreed out of lack of anything else to do, I made my way home and stopped by my infamous next door neighbour. I tapped the door lightly and watched in amusement as the letter box opened and a pair of ruby orbs glared out at me. I bent down and waved until the front door opened, a gloved hand hoisting me inside.

"Evening." I smiled.

"What is it this time Amy-worm?" Zim sighed.

"Well, you know that we're friends?" I started, smiling as sweetly as possible.

He arched his brow and folded his arms, "That's not the label that Zim agreed on…"

"Okay, frienemies!" I offered, "Well ,two of my friends from my old home are coming to visit tomorrow morning and I promised them that they could meet the people I'd met here. So, I was wondering, will you come over mine tomorrow and meet them?"

"Pfft, Zim has no time to meet pathetic humans when there is much to do here!" He eyed me cautiously, "Why should I?"

"Because it will really mean a lot to me and," I hurried on when I figured that wasn't going to work, "and won't it be beneficial for you to meet humans of other countries, that way you'll be more prepared for world domination and stuff."

He tapped his chin in thought, "You have a point, but Zim wishes to know about them first! Zim shall not fall victim to whatever trick you are playing."

"No trick, but fair enough." I pulled up a picture of them on my phone, "That's Bryony and that's Tami. They're twins."

"Twins?" he tried out the word in his mouth.

"When two babies are born from the same…" this was going to be hard, he didn't know about human birthing, "Imagine if two smeets were hatched together from the same tube, it's like that."

He brushed the phone away, "Zim does not have the time, nor interest."

Okay, I was a little disappointed, "Well, I'm not going to force you. It's just, they've heard bit about you and rally wanted to meet the famous Zim in person."

"How much have they heard?" he asked darkly.

"Nothing major, don't worry. As far as they know you're just a loud-mouth kid with a skin condition and a large ego."

He nodded, "Good." He blinked, "Hey!"

I smirked, "So will you 'grace' them with your presence?"

Zim tapped his chin in thought, "Zim shall think on it and appear if he wishes."

Looks like I wasn't going to get much more out of him, "Okay, well, my house tomorrow morning if you're coming. See you around, Zimmers."

He rolled his eyes at the unwanted nickname and waved his hand passively for me to let myself out. I obliged and smiled softly, secretly hoping that he would end up showing up. If I knew him like I thought I did, his curiosity would get the better of him. Like me, he was never one to miss out on something new.

* * *

I burst into fits of laughter as Tami poked me in the ribs. She grinned and adjusted her neon-green lensed glasses. We were all sitting around the table in my kitchen. The twins giggled, their straight blond hair quivering from their movements.

"Well at least one thing hasn't changed!" Bryony smirked, "You've been talking like a proper yank since we've arrived."

"Nah she hasn't changed that much," Tami retorted, suddenly her hands swooped down over my chest, "Scrap that last, something have changed a lot!"

I swatted her away, "And you two haven't changed much. Still too bold for your own good."

"Wouldn't life be boring if we weren't?" Tami asked, putting mockingly.

Bryony gave her sister a nudge, to which she returned. They always did this to me. They ganged up and tried to put me inter awkward situations to try and make me stand up for myself. A confidence booster, they called it. Not in my eyes! They were more confident for ten of me, let along just the two of them. I mentally forgave them every time. Bryony adjusted herself in her chair, showing off the toned nature of her arms.

"How's the tennis going?" I asked.

"Great, I've got a competition in a few weeks."

"Good luck, give me a ring or something to tell me how it goes." I looked at Tami and noticed the tips of her fingers were lightly stained different colours, "Still painting then?"

"She doesn't stop!" Bryony moaned.

"You have your hobbies and I have mine!" her sister protested.

I laughed. We were interrupted by a knock at the door. I'd already explained to the twins that they were going to have visitors and they seemed more then pleased. I opened the door and grinned at the expectant stare from Gaz and shy smile of Dib. Stepping to the side, I let them in and told them to go through to the kitchen. I was a little nervous now, I was worried if they were going to get along or not, but also, there was something I'd deliberately stayed quiet about.

Tami stood up and held her hand out to shake theirs and felt behind her to find her chair again. Bryony however, leant over and clocked something out of place, returning upright again so that she could wheel her chair out from the table and over to greet them. She looked up and them and brought her wheel-chair to a stop before them, holding out her hand.

"Hi, I'm Bryony." She grinned.

"Dib, and this is my sister Gaz." Dib smiled, taking her hand and stepping to the side for Gaz to take over.

Tami stood up again and took a step forward, holding out her palms, "Do you mind? I like to get a _feel_ for who I'm talking to, is that okay?"

When he didn't answer, she lifted up her glasses to reveal her eyes. The stared blankly at nothing in particular and seemed almost incapable of movement. Dib blinked in understanding. She was blind. I've introduced the twins to people before, and there was almost always an issue with their 'impairings'. Like people didn't want to be touched by a person who just wanted to put a face to a voice, or allow a person who couldn't walk to join them at a table. It made me sick. So I was silently begging that Dib was not one of those people.

"Sure, no problem, glasses on or off?" he asked.

"On please."

I breathed a secret sigh of relief. Tami flattened her palms of his cheeks and traced his jaw and lips with her thumbs. Her hands shifted upwards to smooth over his eyes under his lenses and up to the hairline on his brow.

"So this is the famous Dib?" Bryony smirked, eyeing him approvingly.

"Apparently so, I've been waiting to get my hands of this one for a while." Tami smirked. Dib eyed me questioningly and blushed slightly. Tami noted the hint of heat in his cheeks and giggled, "Awe, love him, he's getting embarrassed!"

She finished forming her mental image of him by feeling her hands over scythe-like spike in his air. She pulled away and felt along the side of the table until she came across me. She leaned on my shoulder and tousled my hair.

"Wow, Amy, when you said his spike was solid,"

"And that he had a big head," added Bryony,

"We thought you were talking about something else." They chanted.

"Gaz!" I blurted out a little loudly, "Uh, Gaz, have you spoken to Gaz?"

My cheeks burned as I swatted them away towards the awaiting girl. Dib was just frozen, his rosy cheeks now glowing scarlet. I smiled apologetically and nervously ran my hands through my hair. Well, they were getting on, that was the thing I'd been most worried about. Even if it was at my expense…

"So, Amy says you're pretty much unbeatable on a G.S.2." Bryony stated..

"So do I." Gaz arched her brow, "Is that some sort of subtle challenge?"

"It might be."

She shrugged, "Your funeral."

"Fair enough, you beat me gaming and I'll beat you at tennis."

"You play tennis?"

"Bryony's aiming for the Olympics." I mentioned.

"Paralympics, but either way, I'm getting a gold." She smirked while pumping her fist in the air.

Gaz smirked at the girls blunt attitude and nodded in approval. We returned to our places around the table and resumed some sort of conversation. Dib started explaining his fascination with the paranormal while the twins listened inventively. I was really pleased with how well things were going. They'd barely been talking for ten minutes and already it was like they were old friends. Sure I had to duck my head a few times whenever they brought up an embarrassing story about my old life or if Dib starting asking if they'd seen any alien phenomena around where they're from. But nevertheless, I was really enjoying myself.

All of a sudden, there was another knock at the door. Dib looked at me with annoyed eyes, instantly taking a guys as to who it was. I ignored him and rushed to the door. Stood before me was Zim, fully disguised in wig and contacts. His arms were folded and his eyes narrowed in expectancy. I put my hands on my hips and gave him a knowing grin.

"What made you change your mind?"

"Zim was bored."

"Sure." I nodded, not believing him for a second, "And the fact that you were spying through your window and saw Gaz arriving had nothing to do with it?"

He glared at me, "Zim figured that you were right for once, it would be beneficial for Zim to take note of the many varieties of human that shall soon be my slaves. So, it makes sense for Zim not to miss out on this opportunity."

"Sure it was."

"Do not push your luck."

"Come on in." I sighed, stepping to the side and letting him brush past me.

I led the way into the kitchen and was about to introduce him, when the twins took over. Bryony eyed him from head to toe and gave her sister a playful nudge in the arm.

"Wait a moment Tam," Bryony smiled, "Looks like we're in the presence of the almighty Zim! Man, you weren't kidding about that skin condition!"

"He's really green?" muttered Tami curiously.

"Greener than your glasses."

Zim froze, glaring at me for daring to talk about him without his permission. I smiled and gave Zim a shove in the back so that he stumbled forward, his hand instantly being snatched up by the twins into a hand-shake. Tami stood up and the corner of her mouth gave a twitch of curiosity at the feel of his three fingered claw. Zim watched in mild awe at the sight of Bryony in her wheelchair, never actually seeing such a contraption before, let along a human using it. He raised his head and persevered until they'd finally released him. He cleared his throat and waved his hand passively.

"Yes, I am Zim, and Zim is merely here to observe. So carry on with your day, Zim is of no concern."

My palm smacked against my forehead. Tone it down, Zim, tone it down! To my surprise, Tami giggled and grabbed his hand again, giving it a tug so that he was pulled closer to her.

"Well that just makes me more concerned." She smirked.

Before he could pull away, she lifted her hands to his face and started smoothing along his cheeks and lips. Zim widened his eyes in horror, shuddering at the sudden intimate touch of a human on him. Maybe it was the shock, but he stayed perfectly still. I rolled my eyes at Tami's seductive smirk. She'd always been a touchy flirt like her sister. Wait, she was flirting! Oh please tell me she wasn't interested in Zim! Her thumbs traced his lips and over the bump where his nose should have been and lifted her hands up to feel along the lining of his wig. His lack of ears and nose didn't seem to faze her, in fact, it just made her want to search more. Finally, he swatted her away.

"That is more than enough to picture the glory that is Zim." He muttered.

"I can think of a few more things, you know, to get the full picture." She raised her eyebrows suggestively, moving her hands downwards to feel along his chest and abs.

Zim jarred at her words and sudden touch and slowly edged behind away. Bryony poked her sister in the ribs and shook her head mockingly. Bryony smiled apologetically at Zim, who arched his brow and shrugged, giving the aura that he did not much care for the girls actions.

"Excuse her, she doesn't know when to keep her mouth shut." Bryony grinned.

Dib rolled his eyes, "Neither does he."

"Silence Dib-worm, if Zim remembers correctly, it is you who should keep his mouth shut."

"Guys, give it a rest for one day, please?" I asked, giving them a warning look.

"He's an alien you know." He pointed out.

Bryony looked at her watch and groaned, looking at her sister, "Damn it! Twenty-four minutes and forty-two seconds! I owe you a new pair of shades."

We all exchanged glances, "Um, I'm missing something." I offered.

Tami grinned smugly, "Well, from what you've told us, we placed a bet to see how long it would take for him to accuse Zim of being an alien starting from when we were introduced. I said between twenty and twenty-five minutes."

"And I said between twenty-six minutes and thirty minutes." Bryony sighed, "So close."

Dib leant in and raised his eyebrows, "Exactly how much did you tell them about me?"

I blushed and shrugged, looking as innocent as possible, "Pfft, not much really…"

For the next few hours, that's pretty much all we did, just talk. And I was really enjoying myself. It turned out that the reason they were staying with me for just one day was because they were passing through. They were on their way to meet their grandparents in Australia and their flight has to pass over the U.S, so why not stop by. I fully agreed. It was a shame that they could only stay for a few hours before their next flight was arriving. But still, it was so great seeing them again and the fact that they were getting along with my new friends was just great. After a while, Zim sighed.

"Will you stop nudging Zims leg."

Tami shrugged, "What's in it for me if I do?"

He narrowed his eyes and chose to ignore the question, "Why does the female have different colours on her fingers?"

Her hands instinctively rubbed together, "I'm a painter. Still life mostly. I feel the shape with my hands then follow the same movements on the page. I could paint you some time if you like. Oh, Bry, show him those pictures you took on your phone."

Bryony brought up the images and handed them around to all of us, ending with Zim. They were beautiful pieces varying from fruit to flowers to people. She was very good at capturing the shapes and details. She always had been. Zim stared at the images for a moment, before pushing it back to them.

He blinked, "Zim assures you that when his name is feared by all, you shall be called into duty to construct a monument."

"Translation: You're really good." I giggled.

Zim glared at me while Dib just smirked wryly. Gaz peered over the edge of her game slave and eyed the alien with irritation. Zim jumped up onto his chair and pointed at me accusingly.

"LIES!" he yelled.

The twins pointed up at him in the same manner and yelled in return "DENIAL!"

"Owned…" Dib muttered.

"Whiner…" Gaz added.

I sighed, not wanting to be left out, "Okay…"

* * *

I figured that it was getting a little boring for everyone just hanging around the house all day, so I made a suggestion to head down to the park. Not to mention that Dib and Zim looked like they were going to lunge at each other at any second if the spent any more time in the same room. Dib helped with pushing Bryony while Tami insisted on being led by Zim, much to his annoyance. When we arrived, Bryony's eyes instantly lit up at the sight of tennis courts. Reading her like a book, I went over to the help booth and rented a few rackets.

Bryony tested out the weight of it in her hands and grinned at me, "Game of two on two?"

"Why not, Dib?" I asked, looking hopeful.

He gulped and looked at the racket in his hands, "Uh, sure, okay."

Within twenty minutes, Dib and I were loosing horribly against Bryony and Gaz. I swung the racket with all my might and was sure it was heading for a brilliant point for us. Then out of nowhere, Bryony skidded on her wheels and swerved, swinging her weapon and knocking the ball back out way. Dib swung his arms aimlessly and let the ball bounce right past him.

"Come on Dib, you're not even trying!" Bryony laughed.

"He is. He just really is that bad." Gaz muttered, rolling her eyes.

He panted for breath and wiped the sweat from his brow. I smirked and tossed him a bottle of water to which he gratefully swallowed. From the sidelines Zim was cackling at the boys hopelessness. Dib glared at him and threw the ball in the air and swung the racket. The ball shot through the air and smacked the alien in the face. I bit my lip to stop myself laughing as Bryony's jaw dropped open.

"That's more like it!" she cried.

"You okay?" Tami asked, lifting Zim back to his feet and smoothing her hands over his arms slowly.

He glared, unnerved by the touch and stepped away, "Zim is fine, Tam-worm."

Gaz arched her brow at Bryony, "You're sister is very… interested in Zim."

"Apparently so, jealous?"

"Why would you even try and disgust me like that?"

"Well, according to Amy the two of you kind of li -"

"Ready for another match?" I called, deliberately cutting her off, "Zim, fancy having a go?"

Zim eyed me sceptically, "Does the Dib and Amy-worm wish to lose their facial features?"

Dib and I exchanged glances, "Not really, no." I answered.

"Then we understand each other."

* * *

All too soon, we were walking them back to the airport to see them off. I felt really depressed, it hadn't even been a full day and already they were going. Who knows how long it would be before we saw each other again. We stopped outside of the airport and I span Tami around into a hug. Dib backed off slightly and gave the others signal to follow suit. I appreciated it and made note to thank him later.

"Hey, no fair on the sneak attack!" she grinned, returning the gesture.

I let go and stooped down to embrace Bryony, "Give me a call or something when you land."

"Will do! Wow, you still worry about everything, don't you?" she smirked.

"Naturally."

Tami joined in the group hug and whispered, "Zim seems kinda fit." I snorted and straightened up, she shrugged, "Too bad he's take, Gaz better keep an eye out."

"They're not together!" I muttered, rolling my eyes.

"Unlike you and Dib." Bryony arched her brow, raising her voice a little.

"Seriously? Why?" I gaped, unable to believe that they were still on this.

"Because he's as jittery as you and it was funny!" Bryony explained, "It was just a joke, silly!"

"Plus, you two need a push along by the looks of it." Tami added.

"No push, we need no push because there's nothing to push." I stated firmly.

"Sure there's not." They grinned.

I rolled my eyes and chose not to further to conversation and grabbed them both in another hug. Bryony wheeled over and grinned up at the group.

"It's great meeting all of you, you take care of our Amy, okay?"

"Uh, sure, will do." Dib blushed.

"And we'll be back if we hear otherwise." Tami warned playfully.

For a second, Zim looked truly panicked. But he composed himself and waved his hand passively as an act of goodbye. With a final hug goodbye, they were gone. I lingered for a moment, feeling a pang of homesickness for Wales. It was a strange feeling that I'd really never experienced, only once when I first moved here, but that was it. Dib nudged my shoulder playfully.

"Well they were pretty cool." He muttered.

"They were alright." Gaz shrugged, pulling out her G.S.2 and making her way home.

I turned around to face Zim, but he'd already gone. I sighed and faced Dib again, he just rolled his eyes and started leading the way down the road. Following him closely, a smile broke out on my face.

"Thanks."

"For what?"

"For really making an effort today. They had a great day, I could tell."

He shrugged, "Yeah well… If it's okay to ask, how come you didn't mention their, conditions, before?"

I swallowed, "Because I felt like it wasn't something important that defined who they were."

"I, you know… like that about you."

"What?" I asked, hoping for more of a detailed answer.

"Uh… see you in skool!" he babbled, rushing of in the other direction, blushing slightly.

I shook my head and carried on down the sidewalk. He was a strange boy, but I liked that about him. He was so anxious, worse than me sometimes! He should just relax. Ha, says me… After a short walk, I ended up back at my house and was about to enter when I hesitated. Something in the window of the house next door caught my attention. Curiosity building, I pocketed my keys and hopped over the fence and knocked on the vibrant front door. Zim opened and let me in, almost like he was expecting me to show up. I smiled.

"Hey, you vanished before I could ask. So, did you like them?"

He paused, "They were… curious. Why was the Tam-worm so fascinated by the touch of Zim and stare to blankly? And why does the Bryony-creature reside in such a strange mechanism?"

Here we go again. But I was at least grateful the he had chosen to wait until they were gone before asking me. Maybe he knew it was a sensitive subject? Or maybe Tami really did make him uncomfortable. I wasn't sure, but he had asked me an honest question. So he deserved an honest answer.

"Tami was born with her eyes underdeveloped, so she can't see. She's blind. And Bryony… she was in a car accident a few years ago, so now she can't walk."

Zim swallowed the information and lulled it over in his head. Something clicked inside that I couldn't catch on to. It was a long pause and I was starting to feel uncomfortable. He wrung his hands and turned away to sit down. He looked deflated, sad even. I tilted my head and couldn't decide what to do. Finally, I chose to join him on the sofa and nudge his arm gently.

"You okay?"

He narrowed his eyes at me, but then softened, looking down at the floor, "Zim was not aware that humans could have defects too…"

I blinked in surprise. Part of me wanted to punch him there and then for daring to call them that. But the other part of me was reminding me that it hadn't been that long since he was labelled a defect himself, so his perception of one was unclear. In his mind, anything that was not like everything else was defective. I sighed.

"They're not defects, and neither are you. They're just people who happen to have a certain thing to deal with. Who doesn't? It doesn't make them defective at all."

He looked at me curiously, "So if lack of sight and a major motor skill doesn't make _them_ defective, then what is it that makes Zim one?"

I didn't wait for an invite or worry about his reaction, I draped an arm over his shoulder and took his hand.

"You are not a defect. There's no such thing as a defective person."

He brushed me away and glared at me, "How can a human see things in such a way? The ignorance and naivety of it!"

"I'm not ignorant and I'm not naïve." I retorted, "I'm just telling you how I see it. They accepted their conditions and it made them stronger. Look at Bryony, she can't move a muscle from her hips own and yet she's training for tennis competitions so that she can bring home gold one day. And Tami, she's never seen a shade of colour in her life, yet she can paint things more realistically than is they were photos! So don't you dare tell me that they're defects. And don't you even think about calling yourself one either. I don't want to hear it and I refuse to believe it."

He stared at me while I vented at him. My words sunk in and he tried to process them carefully. I couldn't tell what he was thinking, it was very rare that I could. But for some reason, he actually smiled at me. Not with appreciation or apology, or even his usual wry smile. It was just a smile.

"The Amy-worm is…" he faltered, "strange."

"Yeah, maybe I am."

Feeling that I'd made my point, I leaned in for a weak attempt at a comforting hug and got to my feet. Just as I was about to walk through the door, his voiced stopped me.

"Amy."

I jolted. He never called me by my name, just my name. Normally there was some snide comment attached, like when he referred to Dib. Not this time. I didn't turn around, I just waited expectantly for him to find his words.

"So, Zim doesn't understand. What is a defect?"

I allowed myself a small smile and gave him a simple answer that I figured summed up my opinion. Without turning around, I just shrugged.

"A defect… is a myth."

**A/N:**

**I'd like to point out that this subject is very serious and isn't addressed enough. You hear so much about bad things happening and how it affects people negatively, but barely anyone mentions how people can gain something from it and achieve anything they want. Bryony is based on a male friend of mine who shares a similar condition and is well on the way to recovery. Tami is based on a teacher I had in school who taught art who got me a B graded overall. I tried to handle this subject as delicately as possible and I hope I did a good job, if not, I'm deeply sorry.**


	3. What is this Infection?

**Amy finds herself trapped in Zim's base, and he's losing it big time. He claims that he's been infected with some sort of poison that only human females care capable of producing. How can Amy help him and who is the one that is supposedly 'infecting' him. And why does she feel like she can relate? Set a couple of weeks before "Birthday of Wonder and Doom" methinks.**

It had been a tiring day at skool and frankly all I wanted to do was curl up and go to sleep. But would luck have it that way. Well, anyone else's, luck, sure it would. But not mine. Dib had chosen to come home with me so that he could see if there was a way inside Zim's base from closer to mine, that way he would look less suspicious. I just groaned, he always looked suspicious around Zim's base! But still, he could carry on working if he wanted, I was too tired to argue.

We had to pass in front of Zim's house to get to mine. Now, looking back, I really should have seen the large sheet of glass that was blocking my way. But the sun was shining and I was tired. So I ended up slamming face first into it and falling flat on my back. Dib, taken by surprise had jumped backwards to avoid me and ever so charmingly letting me hit the ground.

"Man, are you okay?" he gasped.

I groaned from the floor and rubbed my face, "What the hell was that?"

He stepped around me and tapped the glass, "Who leaves a sheet of glass standing up like… Amy, why are you laying on an 'X'?"

I pushed myself up and looked down at the pavement slab I was sitting on. A large red 'X' had been painted directly where I had fallen. Confusion spread across my face. I was about to stand up and ask the very same question, when there was a grind of metal against metal. The slab suddenly vanished beneath me. Before I had time to register what was happening, I was falling.

Above me, the small square of light sealed shut, sending me plummeting into darkness. I landed harshly on some sort of metal sheet which tilted violently, sending me sliding downwards at an alarming pace. A shriek of fear escaped my but my breath was whipped away by the air whistling past me. Within seconds, a dim light was approaching beneath me. My feet hit the ground with sudden force, buckling my knees and sending me sprawling onto my stomach and wincing at the new grazes that had formed on my knees. I groaned from the pain and pushed my dazed self up and starting brushing myself off.

Where was I? Seriously? I actually had to ask? The swarms of machinery and computers along with the ceiling made of mainly wires and tubes were the main give away. The sound of someone clearing their throat made me jump and turn around. From the shadows emerged a green figure dressed in a dark pink uniform, glaring at me with ruby eyes, his antenna quirked in thought. I sighed and gave him a wave.

"Can't you just invite me in or give me a call like other people?" I asked with playful sarcasm.

"Zim could, but this is more fun."

"Well the glass sheet and trap door were new." I nodded, "So, why the sudden need for a drop-in visit?"

His shoulders slumped slightly at my nonchalant attitude, but quickly recovered, "Zim demands to know the secrets of the poisons you female humans produce!"

I blinked, really not knowing how to react to that one, "Uh… Can you rephrase that?"

He tilted his head in confusion. The alien stepped forward and began to circle me with curiosity in his eyes. A hand flicked at my hair and he stopped so that he was standing directly in front of me. His eyes travelled over me a few times before he leant forward and eyed my chest.

"You are female, aren't you?"

My hand smacked under his chin so that his head snapped back up to lock eyes with me, "Eyes up here dude." I warned.

"Answer the question!" he snapped, folding his arms like a child that had been scolded.

"Yes, I'm a girl, I thought that was pretty obvious. What's your point?" I was starting to feel a little uncomfortable.

Zim placed his fingertips together, "My point, human, is that I am fully aware that you females posses a poison that is capable of infecting the male mind. Zim is not aware, however, of why this poison is capable of infecting me when I am not even the same race!"

And he lost me again. Not that I was ever found, "Zim, I really have no idea what you're talking about. We don't contain poisons." The word felt wrong on my tongue, "Are you okay? Are you sick?"

"LIES!" he bellowed, "And Zim is not sick! I've been infected!"

"By who?" I asked, started to get a little worried for him.

"By… It does not matter by whom. Now, tell Zim how to cure this infection of the mind!"

I sighed, trying my best to keep my patience, "Zim. What exactly is this mind infection. What're the symptoms."

He tapped his chin in thought. I figured that if he wasn't going to explain who had 'infected' him, at least I could try and help him out figuring out what the problem was. Although, knowing him, it wasn't likely that I was going to get a straight answer anytime soon. Finally, he answered me, gripping his head in his hands.

"It's like a headache! Only instead of pain, there are thoughts of _that_ human who shall remain unnamed. And in these thoughts, Zim wishes to see them more, but then when Zim does, he wishes to get away and stay at the same time! I wish to please them and destroy them and I feel disgusted yet intrigued! What is happening to Zim?"

I had been listening inventively, honestly never hearing an infection like that before. He looked at me desperately, yet with the usual glimmer of irritation. My mouth opened and then closed many times, trying to find a way to comfort him, yet still having no clue.

"Is there anything else?" smiling sheepishly.

"Clearly Zim must break this down for your inferior human mind." He deflated, "Is it possible to want to be with someone, yet want to create distance?"

There was something about that which reminded me of Dib. I wanted to hang out with him more, and see him and talk to him and every now and again I kind of wished to make myself physically closer to him. To have his arm on my shoulder or to brush my hand against his… But at the same time, I forced myself not to, because he was my friend and that was that. It wouldn't work and I wasn't going to try anything when he obviously didn't feel the same. So distance was good, in some sense. Wow, it really was conflicting.

"Yeah, it's really possible."

"This person fills your thoughts." He added, trying to make his point more clear.

"Most of the time."

"And when you are with said person, there is a need to make them happy, and make them suffer?"

"Yeah. Like you get dragged around by them and you're so sick of it that you just want to turn around and punch them in the mouth but then you go to do it and suddenly you just feel the need to go along with it because they ask you to!"

He hesitated and looked at me closely, "You are either very bad at keeping information from me, or you are infected yourself."

I blinked, "Neither. And how did this end but being about you questioning me?"

Zim smiled wryly at me, very pleased with the sudden turn of events. No, I refused to let him manipulate me. This conversation was just pointless and getting way off topic. This was about him and not me.

"So, are you going to tell me who infected you?" I asked, folding my arms.

"No, not unless you tell Zim what this disease is called."

I sighed. Why did he have to be so damn stubborn? Well that was a little hypocritical coming from me. But I was past caring. Right now I was fighting against my curiosity, my tiredness and my reluctant ability to relate to the alien. Wait, I was sympathising with him, relating to him. No, no I wasn't, I was understanding him. I did not have a connection in any way.

"I think… you've got a crush on someone." I smirked, "It means you're developing strong feelings for someone."

He widened his eyes in horror, "Zim has strong feelings of hatred towards the Dib-worm, is that an example of a crush because Zim assures you that Dib-filth is not the infector of Zim's head!"

I snorted with laughter and quickly corrected myself, "Strong _positive_ emotions. And I guessed it wasn't Dib if you're asking for a female's help."

He huffed and glared at me, "So this 'crush' thing, is it dangerous?"

"That's a difficult question. Physically, no it's not dangerous and overall it's not deadly. Wait, it's not even a disease or infection; it's a state of mind. No one did this to you Zim, it's just something that's been building up." I smiled, "It's actually a pretty good thing more often than not."

"And what does one do to eliminate it? Zim is Irken, Irkens do not have these emotions and they must be taken away at once!" he said with a hint of desperation in his tone.

"You can't. It either goes away on its own, or it stays until you act upon it."

"Zim has no time to wait this out!"

"Then act on it!" I chuckled.

Zim hunched his shoulders and glared at the floor, "Zim does not know how. And neither does he wish to."

I placed a comforting hand on his shoulder which he either didn't notice or could not be bothered to shake off. In honesty, I had a pretty good idea who this 'infector' was, but I didn't want to make him mad by asking him again. It must have been mental torture for him to even ask me for help let alone continuing this conversation.

"Look, if waiting it out isn't going to work, then you'll have to do something about it. If you're worried, then you can…" I swallowed thickly, "Practice on me."

His eyes darted up to mine in disgust, "What are you suggesting, human?" he asked darkly.

"Well, pretend I'm this person, and then you won't feel so bad when you say it to them, because you've already done it before."

"So, kind of like training for an invasion?" he asked.

"Sure, why not." I smirked, "Now, take a breath, and whatever you want to say or do to that person, do to me."

I stood back and waited. Now, I wasn't sure what was about to happen. What I expected was for him to refuse and kick me out, clearly understanding that I was of no real help to him, because in fairness, I wasn't. Or maybe he would stumble a few words out and leave it at that. What actually happened, was a lot different.

His eyes narrowed hungrily and he shoved me in the chest so that I was thrown back against the wall, knocking the air out of me. As I gasped for air, his hands slammed against the wall either side of my head, palms flat against the wall and blocking an escape route. His face was inches from mine, his antenna tilting forward to weave in the strands of my hair. I found myself shaking slightly as his worm-like tongue slithered over his lips. Admittedly, my heart was hammering against my ribs, but this was a little too extreme for me, not to mention I was actually scared of him at that moment. I'd never seen a dominating look like that, he stared at me like I was his possession.

"You belong to Zim now… Little-Gaz…" He purred.

I shoved him in the chest and ducked under his arms to get away from him. I held out my hands to keep him at arms length and started backing away.

"Okay…" I gasped, "You may want to try a different approach!"

He seemed to snap out of his trance and clutch his head desperately, "It's taking over Zim!" he cried.

"Just, try something a little more, subtle." I paused, "Little-Gaz? It's Gaz? I knew it!"

"You know nothing worm-child!" he blurted, eyes darting, "Zim demands you leave now!"

I shook my head, "Hell no, I knew it was Gaz! Look, just go up to her and talk to her, ask her out maybe?"

"Oh because your last advice went so well!" he growled.

He had a point there, thinking about it, it had been a pretty stupid idea, "Well, yeah, but this one hopefully won't end up with you pining someone to the wall! Trust me, if you go up to her and say you like her, you might just be surprised by the outcome."

Thinking that maybe I'd overstayed my welcome, I chose to make my way towards the elevator and not turn back. Clearly I'd made him regret ever coming to me, which I felt awful about. I really wanted to help him, but as many people will already know, it's a hard thing to comment on. Only one person can know what to do, and that person is the one who is the most confused. Just as I was about to step inside the lift, he cleared his throat.

"So theoretically, if Zim was so confront this infection, it would be better?" he asked, eyed narrowed quizzically.

I smiled, "I think so."

"Then why doesn't the Amy-beast follow her own advice?"

He gave me a wry smirk as I vanished in the lift. His words hit me harder than his hands only minutes ago. I was blinded in a daze all the way out of his house. I didn't even notice Dib with a crowbar trying to prise open the trap door I had fallen down. He let it clang to the ground and rushed up to me and checked me over.

"Hey are you okay? You were gone for ages? Did he do any experiments? Did you get any pictures?"

I just let him carry on, he'd run out of steam soon enough. All that was going through my mind was… I didn't even know. Zim explaining his predicament to me had just opened up so many questions of my own. Had that been his plan, to confuse me? No, I think he was truly worried about his sanity back there. I hoped I had helped him, but I wasn't sure. But, where did that leave me?

_Why doesn't the Amy-beast follow her own advice?_

"Dib." I said, cutting him off.

He paused, eyes arched and waiting for me. What was I going to say? Could I say anything? I didn't know, but I had to say something, he was standing there waiting for me. I looked up at those amber eyes and smiled softly. He returned the smile, unsure of why.

"Dib… Do you mind helping me with chemistry homework?"

**A/N:**

**Damn it, Amy! So close! **


	4. First Date

**To answer a question that a few people have asked me in the past, Amy is sort of based on me, like curiosity and love for the weird and wonderful, but she's a lot nicer than I am as I have a very quick temper, haha. So to answer the question, she was based on me at the start and has ddeveloped into a character all her own over time. XD onward to the one-shots!**

**Dib has been avoiding Amy since her birthday for a good week now, but when he finally shows up, he's got a very strange question to ask her… Set after the 'Birthday of Wonder and Doom'.**

It had been a good week since I'd had possibly the best birthday in my life. So why didn't I feel happy? Maybe it was because I had the rest of summer to look to with no plans whatsoever. Maybe it was because it was my first summer in my new home. Or maybe it was because it had also been a good week since I'd seen Dib. And that had been at my birthday 'party'. I smiled at the memory. We'd been standing in the corner of the room together, then he'd brushed his lips against my cheek and bolted. I'd made the stupid mistake of following him. _You did it wrong. If you're going to kiss me, then kiss me._

Oh no, it was my fault. I'd pushed him into a corner and now he was too freaked out to see me. Great, well done Amy. The only proper friend I'd made and now he was gone because I'd been an idiot. I groaned and buried my head in my pillow. It wasn't as if I hadn't tried getting in contact with him, but he was never there. Gaz said that he was out 'doing some of his paranormal nerd stuff'. Maybe he was. But he normally invited me along for that stuff. Well, oaky, I knew the mistake I'd made… and now I had to live with it.

I'd been moping around the house for the full week and the walls were starting to close in around me. From my bedroom window, I could see the green-blue walls of Zim's house. I shrugged, he probably didn't want to see me, he rarely did, but I needed some interaction or else my sanity was at stake. Closing the door behind me, I made my way across the front yard and knocked on his door. Instead of Zim opening the door, he simply tapped the glass of the window to the right to get my attention.

"Zim is very busy human, I have no time for your infiltrations today!"

I rolled my eyes, "I'm not here to infiltrate, I just came for a visit."

He eyed me suspiciously from behind the window, "Oh really, then why is he here?"

I arched my brow in confusion and turned on my heel to follow his gaze. Instantly, my throat ran dry and my eyes widened. At the end of the pathway was a figure clad in a black trench coat and raven hair styled in a scythe-like spike. I swallowed thickly. He just stood there with his hands hanging limply at his side. His slightly jittery eyes darted to my torso and back up again. I looked down subtly at myself and blushed. I was wearing the purple coat he'd given me for my birthday.

"Uh, hi." He said sheepishly.

"Hi." I returned.

He walked up to me and nodded, chewing his lip nervously, "Long time no see."

So he was aware of it then, "Yeah," I forced a laugh, "avoiding me or something?"

"No, no, just been sorting out… stuff."

"Yeah, me too. Lots of stuff."

Oh god this was just getting uncomfortable now. It wasn't helping with Zim tapping on the window like a grumpy old man.

"You can leave the yard now! Leave the yard of Zim!" he demanded.

It was like we couldn't hear him. Dib eyed me over again and cleared his throat.

"The coat suits you."

I nodded, "Thanks. Thanks for getting it for me."

Do I leave? Do I carry on making dead-end conversations? I didn't know, and neither did he by the looks of things. Part of me wanted to give him a hug, just to shatter the tension, another part wanted to smack him in the mouth, also to break the tension. Let's be honest, either way would have made a change in atmosphere.

"Have I done something wrong?" I blurted out before I could stop myself, I reddened and looked down at my shoes, not wanting to see his reaction, "It's just… I haven't heard anything from you since my birthday and, well, I thought we had a good time and, if I've done something wrong… I'd like you to tell me."

He jolted, "No you haven't, no way! I just figured that, you know, you…"

"Spit it out Dib-worm and get off my lawn!" Zim cried through the window.

"Can it, lizard!" Dib snapped, tossing a pebble at the alien, it just bounced pitifully off of the glass and onto the grass.

I allowed myself a smirk, trying not to start laughing at their bickering. Dib sighed and tried to compose himself.

"I've been thinking a lot lately and, you know, we've known each other for a while now, right?"

Where was this going? "Yeah, quite a while." I agreed cautiously.

"And we've, you know, k-kissed… like on the cheek and stuff and… you know… so I was thinking…"

His cheeks were starting to burn almost as much as mine were, "Yes…?"

He looked over my shoulder to glare at Zim who was apparently still listening, "Shall we go somewhere else?"

"No! Wait Dib-monkey! This is getting interesting!" Zim moaned, pressing his face against the glass, "Not often does Zim see the Dib embarrass himself so!"

I giggled but bit on my lip to stop it, "Go on." I pressed.

Dib sighed and looked at me hopefully, he took a deep breath and blurted out: "Doyouwanttogoonadatewithme?"

I blinked, only able to pick out a few choice words, none of which made sense on their own, "Uh, a little slower please?"

He took another breath and muttered, "I was thinking, that, if you wanted to… would you g-go on a d-date… with me?"

My breath caught in my throat. I could feel Zim's eyes burning the back of my head and it really wasn't helping. Did he seriously just say that? I'm sure he did, but did I mishear him or something? One minute he was avoiding me and the next, this? I noticed that my mouth was open slightly so I snapped it shut. He was starting to wring his hands in anticipation. Oh god how long had I been silent for?

"So, after a whole week of avoiding me and not talking to me, you think you can ask me on date?"

I deliberately made my expression unreadable. His pupils dilated as he wracked his brain for the right answer.

"Uh, yes?" he blinked, "I mean no, no! Um, maybe? Yes? No?"

I smirked shyly at his stumbling, revenge achieved! Yes, call me evil but I had deliberately asked him that to make him squirm. Now, to get rid of my cursed guilt! I punched his arm playfully and grinned.

"Yes."

He paused, tilting his head in confusion, "What was that?"

I opened my mouth to answer but my words were washed away by the high pitched sounds of machinery. Two hot beams of red shot past my head while another set missed Dib's feet by inches. We turned to see the gnomes starting to swarm. Zim stood in the window with a remote in his hands, directing the garden security with an irritated scowl.

"She said yes, Dib-worm! Now get away from the house of Zim, you bore me!"

I ducked another set of beams and held Dib grab my hand and pull me along the path until we were safely out of reach. He ducked down behind the garden fence and pulled me down with him. I flattened my back against the wood and gasped for breath. I looked down and noticed that his hand was still gripped onto mine.

"So… yes?" he asked nervously, also gasping for air.

I smiled, "Yeah. Yes."

He leant back and smiled almost with disbelief.

"So…" I pressed, smirking slightly.

"So?" he repeated, looking confused.

"So, where are we going?" I laughed.

His eyes widened, "Oh right, yeah, sure." He paused for thought, "Uh, movie? Tomorrow? And, uh, we could go to Bloaty's after, you know, if you like? Or if you don't then -"

I chose to cut him off before he started babbling again, "Movies and Bloaty's sounds great."

He nodded and seemed to breath another sigh of relief, "Oh uh, shall I come by yours at, uh, seven?"

Seeing his nervous smile made me giggle, "Yeah, really looking forward to it."

It was at this point that he looked down and noticed that he was still holding my hand. Out of habit, he snatched it away, but then remembered the conversation we'd just been having and looked unsure as to whether he should replace it or not. Instead, he simply patted it lightly before peering up over the top of the fence. He nodded that it was all clear and helped me to my feet. As I was brushing myself down, a thought suddenly made me pause. I arched my brow at him questioningly.

"How come you were going to Zim's anyway?"

He blushed, "I wasn't… I was going to yours, but then I saw you there instead. Why were you heading to Zim's?"

I shrugged, "I was bored, and look where it got me" I grinned.

He eyed me with a smirk, but it quickly vanished as he glanced down at his watch, "I've got to go, my dad's coming home tonight and I promised I'd be there when he arrived."

I nodded in understanding, "So, until tomorrow then?"

He smiled and nodded eagerly, "Sure."

* * *

The next night, it was coming painfully close to seven and I was sure that I was going to have an asthma attack. I looked in the mirror and felt like something was just off. I'd wanted to play it safe and go for my leggings and denim jeans with a nice top, but my darling mother had other ideas… So I'd been forced into a flipping skirt. My black skirt that held multiple belts of different colours and my dark purple top that I'd worn on my birthday. Sure, it looked okay, and it went well with the coat that Dib had bought me, so that was one positive. It just looked like I was trying too hard. Sure it was a date and all, but, he was still my best friend. Wow this was confusing…

There was a knock at the door and my heart jumped into my throat. I could hear my mum answering the door and talking to someone. Why was I so nervous? She'd spoken to Dib loads of times, why was this so different? I took a deep breath and tried to calm myself down. I looked at my reflection and looked at myself forcefully. Don't think of it was a date. You are going to the movies with your friend and the heading for a pizza. That's all.

I went downstairs and saw Dib standing there waiting for me. He straightened up and smiled, his eyes widening slightly at the sight of my skirt. I cringed, I hated this thing so much… Too late now.

"Ready?" I asked, smiling to try and fight any blushing that was bound to happen.

"Yeah, ready." He breathed.

As we walked down the sidewalk towards the movie theatre, I wasn't sure if I was meant to take his hand or not. They kept brushing against each other softly, but he never made a move and after the incident on my birthday, I was a little hesitant to. He cleared his throat and ran a hand nervously through his hair.

"You, uh, you look great, you know." He muttered.

A hint of a smile crept to my face, "Thanks, you're looking pretty dapper yourself."

Dapper? Where the hell did that come from?

"So what movie are we seeing?" I asked hurriedly.

We reached the theatre and examined the showings. There were two films due to start in the next ten minutes. One was a rom-com that looked like a tired re-write of every other rom-com in the world. The other was a thriller about a guy who wakes up to find the world over-run with weird creatures and has to save the world… I eyed Dib playfully, knowing exactly which one he wanted to see. And to be honest, so did I, you see one rom-com you see them all. He looked at me, waiting for me to choose.

"All things considering," I smirked, pointing at the thriller poster, "this one seems more realistic."

He chuckled, "Can't argue with that."

After some debating, we finally agreed that if he bought the tickets, I would by popcorn and drinks. Within minutes, we were taking our seats in front of the large screen and sorting out our stuff. I stood up to remove my coat but felt a soft tug and found that Dib was already taking it in his hands, sliding it off of my shoulders gently. I smiled appreciatively and took my seat to the right of him. Wow, he was really trying to impress me, wasn't he? I thanked the lord when the room started to darken so that he didn't see my cheeks reddening. The trailers for future movies started playing and I noticed that Dib's hand was placed carefully on the arm-rest. Was I meant to take it? Or was he just more comfortable with his arm twisted like that so the palm faced upwards? I swallowed and chose to make a compromise with myself. I moved my arm so that it also rested there, just on the edge so that our fingers were just off brushing each other. There we go, now he could make the move and take my guess work away.

He nodded towards the screen, "See anything you like the look of?"

I bit down on my tongue to stop myself from blurting something stupid out and simply shrugged, "A few things don't look too bad."

He glanced down and smiled shyly, snapping his eyes back up to the screen.

Finally, the movie started playing. Within the first ten minutes, I could tell that this was going to be a seriously creepy flick. Now I wasn't one to be scared of films like this, in fact quite the opposite especially as of late. Hanging around with Dib and Zim really strengthened my nerves… for the most part. But for the first thing in a movie to be a man waking up and slithering creature half-way into his ear and snaking into his brain with blood spurting out; it's not something you expect so soon. I watched in amusement as Dib's eyes widened in awe at the creatures and how to hero of the story battled his way through them with almost comical ease. He leaned in closer to me and whispered:

"That's gonna be me one day." He nodded, "No aliens or monsters are gonna get in my way."

I nodded in agreement, "I don't doubt it."

He grinned at me and leant back in his seat, tilting the tub of popcorn towards me. I took a small hand full and popped them one at a time into my mouth. He nudged my arm to get my attention. I looked over and he tossed one into the air and caught it skilfully in his mouth. I rolled my eyes and followed suit, tossing two together and catching them both. His eyebrows raised with an impressed aura and he tried to copy me. One landed in his mouth while the other flew off course and bounced off of his glasses. I sniggered and tossed another two into the air, tilting my head ready to catch them. Just as gravity was about to kick in, Dib swooped his hand across and snatched them out of the air, smirking in triumph. I poked my tongue out at him and bounced another piece off of his glasses.

Through all of this, we'd taken our attention off of the movie and didn't notice how the hero had walked right into a trap set by the creatures. Everything went deadly quiet, and we didn't even notice. All of a sudden, one of the creatures pounced out of nowhere, giving off a blood-curdling screech that echoed around us. I jumped and let out a muffled shriek while Dib yelped in surprise, sending his arms flailing in the air. Slowly, I peeked my eyes open and blushed as I realised that in my shock I had leant over so I was no with my cheek pressed against Dib's shoulder. He looked down at me and smiled sheepishly. I didn't know why until I noticed that his arms had circled around my shoulders defensively. Dib gave a nervous laugh and started to pull away when I realised, I didn't want him to. Trying not to look too obvious, I pretended that I hadn't noticed our closeness and adjusted myself so that I was properly leaning on his shoulder. I could feel him looking at me with wide eyes. Slowly, his arms relaxed, the right draping over my shoulders and the left across his lap to the arm-rest between us, taking my hand.

"Uh, is this… is this okay?" he stammered.

I nodded, "I think so, uh, are you okay?"

I heard him swallow, "Sure, I'm fine."

If this had happened a week ago, I would be panicking. I'd be convincing myself that he's just a friend and that I was kidding myself. Not now. Weird. Was this weird? It felt a little weird, but not in a bad way. I put it to the test and moved my hand the he had taken so that our fingers laced together. It felt… warm, not just his touch but warm inside too. This still made no sense to me. But I kind of liked it. Yeah, I liked it.

Soon after, the movie came to an end. Dib and I groaned at the cliché cliff-hanger ending. The kind where it looks like everything's okay and then out of nowhere, something happens that changed things just as the credits start to roll. I furrowed my brow in thought; that sounded familiar for some reason… Anyway, I went to pull my coat on when my hand caught on something and made me stumble back to my seat. Dib looked at me curiously then smiled sheepishly as it turned out it was his hand that had stopped me moving. He snatched it away worriedly and tried to make it up to me by helping me with my coat.

"Sorry," he muttered.

"It's okay, did you enjoy the movie?" I asked, for some reason feeling nervous again.

He grinned, "Yeah! Man, those monsters didn't stand a chance, shame about the ending though…"

"Well they might make a sequel that way."

"Ah, sequels are never as good as the original." He rolled his eyes as we made our way outside.

"Not always true, '_Invasion of A.I Destruction 2_' was way better than the first one." I retorted, thinking back to a movie we'd seen a few months prior.

"I'll give you that, but name three more movies there the sequels were better." He folded his arms challengingly.

My mouth opened ready to argue, when I found that I couldn't actually think of anything to argue with. Instead, I childishly poked my tongue out at him and turned away in a mock sulk. He raised an eyebrow and crept up behind me, jabbing his finger right below my ribs, making me jump and shriek with laugher. Why was it that he never missed? Every single time he was right on target, making me fall into fits of giggles without fail. I swatted him away and tried to catch my breath. He waited for me with an entertained grin on his face.

"One day you're going to pay for every single time you've done that." I gaped, pointing with pretence warning.

He shrugged, "Sure you will."

He was mocking me, but he was doing so playfully, so I didn't care.

"So, uh, do you want to head to Bloaty's?" he asked

"Sure, I'm starving."

Thankfully, the restaurant was only two streets away so it wasn't that far a walk. We sat down at a booth in the corner and checked out the menu. I stared tapping my foot in thought and examined the list of pizzas before me. Dib shifted anxiously.

"Do you want to get one to share or, you know, it's up to you."

I chewed the inside of my cheek, "Sharing's good," feeling a need to settle a score, I smirked and hid the menu, "See anything you like?"

His head snapped up to look at me, picking up on the repeated phrase from earlier, "Maybe, b-but the m-menu's in the way."

I peered over the edge of the menu to raise my eyebrows at him, impressed and somewhat taken back by his bold attempt. His cheeks turned slightly rosy as he returned his eyes downwards.

"Is a large pepperoni okay?" he asked.

"Sounds lush."

He tilted his head, "Is that another welsh tern?"

"Yeah, it means nice, great, sweet, brilliant; a generic positive term really." I shrugged, "So you could say that the weather's lush; the food is lush; the idea sounds lush; you're lush…"

I bit my lip and ducked my eyes downwards, that last one slipped out before I could stop it. Dib blinked at me and smiled sheepishly, signalling that he was going to order the food. As he left, something felt odd around my foot. I looked down where I had been tapping it, all this time thinking it had been smoothing along the table leg. No, the table legs were at the edge, not the middle, so what… Oh great! My hand smacked against my brow. All this time I'd been rubbing my foot against Dib's leg, no wonder he was so jittery! I held my head in my hands and groaned inwardly. Geez Amy what is wrong with you?

It wasn't long before Dib returned with our pizza, balanced carefully in his hands along with two plates. He set it down and smiled, giving the signal to dig in. We ate in near silence, not really knowing what to say. It wasn't awkward as such, just a little too quiet. There was a question that had been bothering me for some time now, and I wasn't sure if I should bring it up, but my curiosity was vastly getting the better of me.

"Dib, how come you chose to ask me on a date now? I mean, I'm glad you did but, you know?" oh sometimes I wished I could keep my mouth shut.

Dib swallowed his mouthful and furrowed his brow, "Well…I guess because I'm always around you I thought that we were just friends, but then, on your birthday… I was a little confused. So I chose to stay away for a while and see if I could make sense of it but, you know, couldn't. So I figured; this made as much sense to me as anything else. So, I went for it." He finished stammering and eyed me, "Why did you say yes?"

Why did I say yes? That was a very good question and held a very anxious answer. Mainly because I wasn't so sure of it myself.

"Um, I suppose because… I missed you. I've seen you pretty much everyday since I moved here, so it didn't really feel, you know, right. Sorry, it sounded better in my head."

"Nah, don't worry. Mine wasn't much better." He smirked, "But, you did actually _want_ to go on a date with me, did you?"

Had I made him that nervous? "Well, yeah of course I did. You did actually _want_ to ask me on one, did you?"

"Yeah…" he smirked and quirked his shoulders in thought, "I guess I did. But having a demonic alien shouting at me while doing so wasn't what I had planned…"

I laughed, "I'm sure he wasn't expecting it either."

He sniggered, "If he tries it again, we'll set your sister on him."

"I'd be more worried about your sister!"

We joked for a little longer before we chose it was getting late and was time for us to leave. It was strange how the weird feeling from earlier had seemed to fade the longer I spent with him. I tried to make Dib take my share of the bill, but he point blank refused. I huffed at it stubbornness and waited until we were walking at a steady pace down the sidewalk before discreetly slipping the money into his coat pocket. Victory, I smirked to myself. Walking side by side, our hands started brushing again. This time, Dib laced his fingers through mine and looked at me warily for permission. I granted it with a smile and flexed my fingers around his in return.

All too soon we were nearing my house. I had to admit, I was feeling a little disappointed that it was over. Against all my worries, I'd had a really good time, with minimum embarrassment and even less awkwardness. I made us stop before we got too close to mine, not wanting my mum to come outside and see us just yet. Dib chewed the inside of cheek anxiously.

"So, did you have a good time?" he asked hopefully.

I grinned playfully, "It's been lush."

He chuckled, "Yeah, lush…"

Dib wasn't letting go of my hand and I wasn't quite ready to do so myself. I looked up at him expectantly, yet not knowing what to expect. He took a breath.

"Uh, so I'll see you tomorrow?"

I deflated inwardly, "Sounds good, I take it Zim's been hatching a lot of plans over the week."

"Yeah, you know I overheard a call me made that…" he trailed off, "Well, it wasn't that important, you know?"

I blinked in shock, "Who are you and what have you done with Dib?"

He laughed, "Still here, and Zim's still going down!"

I pretended a sigh of relief, "So tomorrow?"

"You got it." He tilted his head, "Amy, would you ever, you know, do this again? With me?"

"Another date, you mean?" I waited while he nodded, that weird feeling I had, it was long gone by this point, "Yeah, I think I would."

"Really? Great! I mean, okay, sure… So, uh, bye I guess…"

Dib grinned goofily which made me giggle. He leant forward and shakily wrapped his arms around me in an awkward goodbye hug. I returned it and felt his warmth against the night air. We lingered for a moment before he started to pull away. He lifted his head upwards, but forgot to move his arms, so now our bodies were pressed together and faces inches apart. His eyes widened behind his glasses and I looked away, blushing slightly. Should I make the first move and let go? No, I'd wait him out like last time.

Suddenly, his hand came under my chin, forcing me to look up at him again. His amber eyes were quivering with anxiousness. I watched him curiously, waiting to see what happened next. Slowly, he started to tilt his head forward so his nose brushed mine. Before I could stop myself, I joined him in the middle to that my breath was fogging his glasses. Without warning, he closed the gap and pressed his lips against mine. He lingered for a moment before going to pull away, but I leant over with him so regain contact. He breathed into me and caressed my lips in his, not trying anything too bold just yet. I instinctively grabbed his coat and pulled him so that his body was fully pressed against mine.

This was unlike any of the other times we'd kissed. All those times we'd occasionally brush one another's cheek in secret or dive in for a peck and then bolt… they were nothing compared to this. This was soft, comforting and… soaking!

"AGH!" We cried, breaking apart as something icy cold and wet rained down over us.

I gasped for air and pushed my sodden hair from my eyes. Dib had been knocked off his feet, his hair drooping from the water. Coughing and spluttering, I turned to glare at the sound of bellowing laughter behind us. Where we had stopped before we reached mine, it suddenly hit us as to whose house we were in front of. In the front yard, a green dog was waving at us, holding a hose-pipe in his paws.

The creature dropped it, pointing at a figure in the doorway, "Masta told me too!"

"Man Zim, seriously?" Dib spluttered, getting to his feet.

"Zim told you earth-meats earlier that I do not wish to have to by my house! Especially performing whatever disgusting display that was! Zim could have sworn you were going to inhale one another!"

GIR widened his eyes in awe, "Really? Ooooh! Do it again! Do it again!"

My cheeks burned and Dib took a step forward, "You'll pay for that one you stupid space-monster!"

I held out a hand to stop him. Letting the embarrassment fade away, I smirked at Zim playfully.

"Okay Zim, we're sorry. Now you know what you deserve as a reward for your… victory?"

He arched his brow at me warily, "What's that, Amy-beast?"

I indicated down to my dripping stature and held out my arms, taking a slow step towards him, "A good old fashioned hug."

The aliens eyes widened in horror at the sight of the water, "You wouldn't dare!"

"Wouldn't I, Zim? Wouldn't I?"

Just as I was about to take another step towards him, he grabbed GIR and darted back inside his house, slamming the door behind him, "Stay away from Zim you wretched water-human thing!"

Folding my arms, I looked towards Dib smugly, "Victory for Earth!"

He laughed, "Yeah!"

I joined him in laughter until I started shivering from the icy water and the chilly night air. He walked me to my door and watched while I pulled out my keys. I lingered for a moment, choosing not to head inside just yet.

"Do you want to dry off a bit first before you go home?"

"Huh? Oh no, I'll be fine, thanks." He shifted, "So… I'll see you tomorrow."

I laughed at the amount of times we'd been over this, "Yes, tomorrow."

This time he didn't hesitate, swooping down and placing a gentle kiss on my lips, lingering for a moment before waving goodbye. I smiled shyly and waved back, watching as he walked off down the side-walk. Just before he was about to vanish behind a corner, he peered over his shoulder and grinned when he saw I was still here. He waved again, and then he was gone. I leant against the door and felt a sigh escape me. The only part of my body that was warm, were my lips.

Dib. Dib Membrane… my best friend… I chuckled inwardly as I stepped inside. Who would have thought it?

**A/N:**

**Oh it was fun writing this, let me know what you think of this little romance and if it should blossom or not XD**


	5. Change in Lingo

**Set after the events of my last one-shot, well a few weeks after methinks XD Dib and Amy are having a laugh when Amy asks Dib for something that gets blown wildly out of proportion due to the differences in terms between American English and British English… Let embarrassment and fluff unfold!**

I scowled down at the drawing I had been trying to perfect for the past thirty minutes and rolled my eyes. I just couldn't get the shapes right! The pencil just chose to hate me today. I rummaged around the draws in my desk and under my bed but couldn't find what I was looking for. Dib leaned over my bed so that his upside down head hovered besides mine. I didn't notice until I was about to get up, which made me jump.

He smirked at my reaction, "Looking for something in particular."

"A rubber." I sighed.

For some reason, his head snapped upright to look at me, his pupils dilating vastly in his widening eyes, "A w-what?"

"Rubber." I repeated, "I'm sure I had some around here, you don't have any so you?"

His mouth hung open slightly and he seemed to be shaking slightly, "Uh…"

"I'll give it right back, I only need it for a second." I reassured him.

He slowly got to his feet and started edging towards my bedroom door. I watched him in confusion, what was making him act so weird? It was a simple enough question that deserved a simple enough answer. Why was he acting like I was asking him to jump off a cliff?

"I-I don't s-sorry…" He swallowed, "W-why would y-you need one?"

I crossed my arms and tapped the sketch irritably, "For my drawing, I've made another mistake and need to rub it out."

He sighed with relief and clutched the area over his head, "Oh thank god…"

I arched my brow, "Uh… okay? I'm missing something."

He started laughing, "You mean an _eraser!" _

I rolled my eyes, "Well, yeah. No need to get technical, we call them rubbers in the U.K."

Once again, he burst into fits of laughter, gripping his sides. He gasped for breath and lost his balance, falling off of the bed and rolling on the floor. An alarm bell was starting to ring inside my head. What had brought this on and why had he looked so terrified earlier? I swallowed thickly and tried to prepare myself for the worst.

"Dib, what exactly does 'rubber' mean in this country?"

He stopped laughing and blushed, pushing himself to his feet. He scratched the back of his head anxiously and chewed his lip.

"Uh, well, you see, in America, rubbers are what we call…" he cleared his throat and moved over to whisper the answer in my ear.

Blood rushed to my cheeks turning them scarlet. Oh hell… No wonder he'd been so terrified! God knows what he thought I'd been suggesting! He stepped away and nodded in anxiousness, waiting for me to react further. I bit down hard on my lip and smacked my hand to my head. He started laughing again and sat down on the bed, folding his arms in amusement.

"Should I be worried about asking what you call sidewalks?" he sniggered.

I glared at him through my fingers as I answered, "Pavements. Anyway, you can talk! You can't even say _aluminium_ right! It's Al-_um_-inium, not Al-_loo_-minum!"

He scoffed, "Oh right, and calling fries 'chips' makes so much more sense."

"It makes more sense than calling biscuits _cookies_! Where I come from, the snack in question must be of a certain standard before earning that name." I nodded, deliberately making the issue sound more high-class than it actually was.

"Okay," he raised his eyebrows challengingly, "What do you call potato-chips?"

"Crisps, what do you call ice-lollies?"

"Popsicles. Trash?"

"Rubbish. Trousers?"

"Pants." He paused, "Pants?"

I smirked, "Girls underwear."

"Oh…" he shifted slightly.

"See, not so simple, is it?" I grinned, taking a seat next to him.

He shrugged, desperate to change subject from undeerwear, "Is there any anything specific to where you're from? There's bound to be a few Welsh slang-stuff out there."

I nodded, "Well you already know what a cwtch is… Oh, when something starches you, we call it a scram. And we don't say _tooth_, it comes out as _tuth_."

"That's kinda weird." He smiled apologetically, "Man, Zim's not even from this planet and he picked up the language better than you."

I laughed and punched his arm playfully, "You're defending him now? Anyway, he can't even get our names right _and_ he calls Ms. Bitters Sir!"

Dib sniggered and returned the gesture and shrugged in defeat. My hand found his and our fingers laced together.

"You know, I still kinda like that cwtch thing though."

I grinned and rested my head on his shoulder, "That's my favourite too."

I could hear him swallow thickly and his jaw opened and closed like he was trying to find the right words. In honestly, I had no clue what he was going to say so there was no way I could help him out. All there was to do was wait patiently. I'd never really noticed how many differences there was between U.S and U.K English, it was still English language after all! Why did people have to make it so difficult. Ah well, I didn't mind so much, it made life more fun. Although after the eraser/rubbing thing, I was now vastly considering buying an American dictionary for future safety. Finally, Dib brought me from my thoughts by speaking.

"So, what do you Britt's call, you know, a k-kiss?" he stammered.

I smiled, "Well, there's all different ones. There's pecking, getting off with someone, giving someone a snog -"

"A snog?" he blurted, "What sounds like a cross-over between a snail and a slug!"

I burst out laughing, never really seeing it like that before. Dib had a point, it did sound pretty nasty. He started chuckling with me, resting his head on mine. After a moment, I pulled away and placed a hand under his chin, lifting his head to look at me. He arched his brow in confusion at the change in movements. I gave him a soft smile to reassure him.

"I prefer this term for it though…"

Before he could ask me what it was, I lifted my head to place a soft kiss on his lips, lingering for a second before pulling away again. He grinned and blushed slightly.

"Uh, yeah, I like that one too…" he breathed, "But you still don't have a clue about football."

I threw my hands in the air, "Why call it football if you use your hands? You're playing a weird version of rugby and you don't even know it! If you call your soccer football, and your football rugy, you'd be doing it right."

"It's right the way it is!"

"You don't even like football!"

"Neither do you!"

"So we understand each other?"

He leant forward and placed another peck against my lips, cutting me off and taking me by surprise. He smirked and shrugged, taking my hand again.

"More or less, yeah."

I laughed and shoved him away from me playfully before getting to my feet and looking back at my desk. Sighing, my eyes traced the still unfinished scribbles and the mistake that had still yet to be fixed. I turned back to him and tapped the paper.

"I still need that rubber though."

His eyebrows shot up, "I have that much of an effect?"

My cheeks burned and I buried my face in my hands, groaning at the mistake I'd made again. I peeked through my fingers and saw him biting his lip, trying his best not to laugh at me. And he was failing miserably.

"Eraser! I meant _eraser_!" I chucked my pencil at him playfully, which he easily avoided, "Oh you know what I meant!"

"Sure I did," he winked.

I gave a dry laugh and chose to close my sketch book, finding that it was causing me nothing but embarrassment and annoyance. Turning around, I saw him smiling sheepishly at me. My eyebrows arched suspiciously as he got to his feet and held a closed hand out to me.

"I, uh, I did have one after all…"

My eyes widened, panic starting to set in. That was, until he unclenched his fingers to reveal a small pencil with an eraser secured into it. He reddened at my reaction and at my sigh of relief, suddenly understanding how he had made his offer sound. He dropped the pencil in my hand and nervously ran a hand through his hair.

"So, uh… What were you drawing?"

Thankful for the change in topic, I hastily pulled out my sketch pad again and opened it for him, revealing the scribbles and sketches I had made over the years. As he admired the pieces, which in my opinion were of terrible quality, I made a promise to myself. The moment he left, I was going to by an American dictionary and study like my life depended on it. And knowing how my luck turned out most of the time, it probably would! You can die of embarrassment, you know, and today was too close for comfort…


	6. Switcheroo

**Amy breaks up another of Dib and Zim's fights, but not before the two get connected by one of Zim's devices. Now, the next morning, Dib's feeling a little…alienated while Zim is looking a little pale, and fuzzy. What's going on? Set after the Birthday fic, again XD**

Zim pinned Dib to the wall with the use of his metallic legs and fired his device, sending a dart into Db's skin. A wire was fixed at the end, trailing back into the machine itself. The Irken smirked and passed it between his hands.

"Well, Dib-worm, what shall I shoot next?"

I rolled my eyes, "Getting a bit trigger-happy, aren't you Zimmers?"

He turned to glare at me, "How did _you_ get in here, Amy-beast?"

I pointed my thumb over my shoulder, "Front door was open. And do you mind keeping it down, I can hear you two from next door, people are going to get the wrong idea if it keeps up." I winked.

He shook with anger and aimed the device at me, "You'll do."

I ducked to the side before he side just as he pulled the trigger. The second dart flew through the air and bounced off of the metal wall. The force of it caused it to ricochet straight back towards him. The dart embedded into his neck. I watched in both horror and intrigue as the wire connecting the boy and the Irken sparked with violent flashed of static. They both collapsed to the ground and convulsed from the shock. Finally, they both went still.

For a moment, it looked like they weren't breathing. I jumped forward and grabbed the wire and ripped it from them, the darts falling to the ground. I shook their shoulders desperately, please wake up! Wow, where the darts had bee, the little marks were starting to swell rapidly. Dib was the first to wake up.

"That stupid lizard!" he snapped.

He jumped to his feet and charged towards the unconscious alien. My arms wrapped around his legs, making him trip and fall to the floor.

"Come on, let's go before he wakes up and this starts all over again." I grunted through his struggles.

Finally, he gave in and stormed towards the elevator. He paused and turned around to see what was taking me so long. I was lifting Zim up by wrapping my arms around his waist and dragging him across the room towards the elevator.

"What are you doing?" Dib asked, arching his brow.

"Well, I'm not going to just let him lay on the floor, am I?" I shrugged as the lift starting to move, "I'm just putting him on the sofa so he's more comfy is all."

He rolled his eyes, "You're seriously helping him?"

"He's a friend, in some sense."

The elevator brought us up to the living room where GIR was sitting on the floor, making his toy piggy zoom in the air gleefully. I dragged Zim over to the sofa and lay him on his side, pushing his drooped antenna out of his face. Dib folded his arms in impatience.

"You done?"

I smirked as I turned to him and took his hand, "Jealous?"

He flushed, "What? Pfft, no! I just, you know, it's -"

I cut him off my pecking his lips quickly before dragging him behind me out of the door. As we made out way back towards his house, I couldn't help but notice how short of breath he was getting. His cheeks were red and a sweat was beading on his brow. My teeth clenched in shock at the sight of the mark on his neck.

"Are you sure you're okay? That bump looks pretty bad." I muttered.

Dib prodded the lump that was starting to pulsate, "Yeah, it's not the first time Zim got a good hit."

"Don't have to tell me twice. But, you know… it's turning green."

"It's fine, his was worse." He smirked.

I couldn't really argue with that. By the time we'd been tossed out of Zim's base, there was a peach coloured lump on his neck the size of, well, a peach. Dib tugged at his collar and panted.

"Is it me or is it really hot all of a sudden?"

It really wasn't. In fact it was pretty windy, my coat was fastened to the top! My hand reached up to his forehead and was just as quickly snatched away. The heat coming off of him was unreal! The iris' of his eyes were unusually wide, almost taking up most of his eyes. I swallowed, not wanting to worry him but at the same time worrying like hell internally.

"Uh… okay, here's what we're gonna do." I said, trying to keep my voice steady, "I'm taking you home and keeping an eye on you overnight, okay?"

He arched his brow, "Why? What's wrong?"

"Nothing, nothing, just…" oh wow his voice was getting raspy too, "Just to be on the safe side."

I started pulling him down the sidewalk with more urgency. By the time we'd gotten back to his house, he was vastly out of breath and burning up badly. He collapsed onto his bed and started tugging at his clothes desperately. Clearly the heat was getting to him, sweat was trickling down the sides of his face.

"D-do you mind if…" he pulled at his shirt, "You know…"

I nodded, "No! For gods sake take it off you look like you're going to pass out!"

That was all the invitation he needed. Dib threw his trench coat to the floor and lifted his shirt over his head and dropped it to the side. I couldn't help but stare, he was really fit! Although the fact that he was coated in a layer of sweat was a little gross. He coughed, snapping my attention back to his eyes. He lay on his back and looked pleading at me, then to the window. I nodded and leaned over him to open it, letting in the chilly air.

"Why don't you go have a shower or something to cool down and I'll make something to eat?" I offered.

He breathed deeply and nodded, "Sure… sounds like a plan…"

Dib allowed himself to get pulled to is feet and lead to the bathroom where I left him to it. Downstairs in the kitchen, I started rummaging through the cupboards and fridge for anything that is good for sick people. I was really starting to worry about him, I'd never seen Dib in such a state. What was that thing that Zim hit him with? Was Zim going through the same thing? I hoped not, he only had GIR to take care of him and that wasn't going to end well. Well, Zim knew what that device did so he'd be able to sort himself out. Dib however, well both him and I were clueless about what was going on. Well, this was my plan, I'd keep an eye on Dib tonight, then if he wasn't getting better by the morning, I'd go to Zim's and find out how to cure him.

"AGH!"

My heart jumped into my mouth at the blood curdling cry coming from upstairs. I ran up the steps two at a time and hammered my fist against the bathroom door and demanded to be let in. There was a click as the door unlocked and I pushed my way inside. Dib was leaning against the wall, towel wrapped around him as he shuddered from agony.

"It b-burns!" he gasped.

I rolled my eyes, "Then turn down the temperature, idiot!"

My hand gingerly reached out to let the water rush over me. I winced and retracted in shock. It wasn't hot, in fact it wasn't even warm, it was freezing! How was this burning him? I adjusted the water so that it was of normal bathing temperature and sidestepped sarcastically.

"Think you can manage now?"

Dib narrowed his eyes at me and tilted his head at the falling water. He reached out but the moment the liquid touched his skin we groaned and hastily dried himself on the towel. He looked down at his hand which was now dotted with little pink burns. I swallowed thickly at the sight of it.

"Why don't you leave the shower till the morning?"

He looked at me with sarcasm, "Great idea."

"What do you want to eat?" I ignored his tone, "Think you can stomach anything?"

He licked his lips and tilted his head in confusion, "Actually, I've got a weird craving for… sugar. I'm sure there's some cookies or doughnuts downstairs."

I arched an eyebrow, "Uh, okay."

Minutes later, Dib was fully dressed and sitting a the table in the kitchen, shovelling snacks and sugary stuffs into his mouth at a rapid pace. I leant back in my chair to avoid the crumbs that were flying in all directions. What had brought on this sudden desperation for sugar? Then again, he had been pretty weak before, maybe he needed a little energy. But if he kept this up, he'd be throwing up at any minute. I reached over and took the pack of cookies away from him. He glared at me with a sudden glint in his wide eyes and a low grunt sounded from his throat.

I blinked, "Did you just growl at me?"

He froze and felt nervously at his throat, "I-I'm not sure… I'm sorry I don't know what's going on with me!"

"It's fine, so I take it you're still not feeling too good?"

Dib breathed slowly, "I th-think I'm gonna try and sleep it off. I'll be fine in the morning. Man, my back is killing me!"

I nodded in agreement, "If you say so, but I'm marching you straight to Zim's tomorrow just to be sure."

He rolled his eyes, "Fine by be, as soon as I get my hands on that alien I'm gonna -"

I cut him off by bouncing a cookie off of his head. He deflated and looked at me with a tone that cold only be labelled as unamused. He stood up and followed me back up the steps and into his bedroom. I left him alone to get changed into his pyjamas while I changed in the bathroom. By the time I'd returned, Dib was sitting in his night clothes, gripping his bed with a strange look in his eye. His pupils had shrank into mere specks whereas the coffee coloured iris has swollen rapidly. I placed a hand on his shoulder comfortingly. He flinched but relaxed when he saw it was just me. Whatever Zim had done to him, it was working really well… He smiled softly to reassure me and clambered under the covers. Knowing that there wasn't anywhere else for me to sleep as I'd left my sleeping bag at home, he shifted over to make room for me. I made myself comfortable and grabbed his hand that was starting to scratch at the lump of his neck.

"Sleep now, you'll feel better in the morning." I hushed.

He sighed in defeat and closed his eyes. Sweat was starting to bead of his forehead again. I dabbed at him with a tissue that had been stuffed into my pockets. This fever needed to break if he was going to get better. There wasn't much that I could do for him at that moment. And I'd be no help to him if I was as tired as he was. So I curled up against him and closed my eyes, waiting for sleep to come.

* * *

As, memories from the day before fixing themselves together. By the feel of things, his temperature had gone back to normal. In the haze of semi-sleep, my eyes still refused to open. Next to me, Dib shifted and placed a finger under my chin, pressing his lips to mine. I smiled, only once before had he woken me up like this, and it was great to experience it again.

"Feeling better, then." I muttered as he kissed me again.

His hands cupped my cheeks, but something felt a little off, his fingers were very sharp and there seemed to be less of them somehow. But what took me by surprise the most was his next move. With his lips, he prised mine open. He'd never tried this before… No, something wasn't right here. It was too forceful, to misshapen. All of a sudden, a thin, worm-like tongue slithered into my mouth. My eyes snapped open in horror. Pressing its face against mine, was a large green figure. I shrieked and pushed it away with a quick punch to the chin, rolling over so that I fell out of the bed. I jumped to my feet and picked up the digital alarm clock and lifted it over my head in defence.

"Zim? What the hell!" I cried, "How'd you get in here? Where's Dib?"

The Irken blinked at me in shock, rubbing at it's sore chin. Wait, this ones eyes were a glimmering amber, not maroon. And instead of just two antenna, his were poking out from its bald scalp. I swallowed, there were more Irkens? And why was it wearing Dib's nightclothes? It stared at me in horror.

"Zim?" it stammered, "Why the hell would you call me that?"

"Well, he's the only other Irken I know!" I snapped, gripping my poor choice of weapon tighter, "Now who are you and what've you done with Dib?"

He arched his brow, "Irken? Amy what're you talking about?"

In the shock if it knowing my name, I threw the alarm clock at him. He ducked and flattened against the bed, revealing his grey and blue PAK fixed to his back. He eyed me in terror.

"Amy it's me! Dib! What's gotten into you?"

He got to his feet and held out his palms in an act of calming me, but he paused, catching sight of them. He counted his fingers, all six of them. The two amber orbs widened in horror at the lime-green digits. The reached up to his head where he felt along the two antenna and a whimper escaped him. Finally, he poked out his tongue and pinched the worm-like strand anxiously. He ran past me and into the bathroom, I followed, clenching my fists preparing for any attack. I found him staring at the mirror in horror. For a moment, he didn't move, and then; he screamed.

"I'm Irken! I look just like that space-monster! Amy I swear it's me, Dib!"

I swallowed, "Okay, if you are Dib, then what's your sisters name?"

"Gaz."

"Full name."

"Gazlene."

"What's your worst fear?"

"Moose eating walnuts because their teeth make that crunching noise that sounds just like bones snapping!"

I shuddered, "Graphic… But, what did you get me for my birthday?"

"A coat and 'Alice in Wonderland' book." He pointed for effect as he started rambling, "And at the time I was only a few inches tall after Zim hit me with a shrink ray and gave me to you as a birthday present and after you fixed me we went back to the skool and you kissed me and then that He Is We song came on and we were dancing and then I had a fit when I saw Zim and Gaz dancing together and then a week later I asked you on a date outside Zim's house!"

I blinked, dropping my fists as his green cheeks darkened and he gasped for breath. That was surprisingly detailed… He looked at me pleadingly. I had to admit, there was only one person who could give me that look, as well as have a head that size. I stepped forward and gripped his shoulders in panic.

"What happened to you?"

"You tell me!" he snapped.

"Well at least you're feeling better!" I smiled sheepishly.

He slumped his shoulders, "Really not the time!"

As he slumped, the lump on his neck became visible. It had shrunken slightly in the night, but it still looked sore. I arched my brow in suspicion, that device that had zapped Dib and Zim must have had something to do with this! But wait… if it had turned Dib Irken, then Zim must be…

"We're going to Zim's right now." I commanded.

* * *

Within fifteen minutes, I was pounding my fist against the front door of Zim's house. Dib stood behind me, sunglasses covering his eyes and his trench coat draped over his head to cover his face. The moment the door opened, a peach toned hand shot out and grabbed me. Out of reflex I grabbed at Dib with my free hand. The unknown force hoisted the pair of us indoors. We stumbled and nearly collided with the sofa. I turned around and felt my jaw drop.

Standing before us was a vaguely familiar figure. Its large eyes looked human, and had a thin maroon iris. Where there had once been antenna, was now a thick mop of raven hair. It pointed at us, but still not used to it's extra fingers, ended up aiming two fingers at us instead. If he wasn't standing right before me, I would never have believed it.

"See what happens when you interfere, vile human!" he snapped.

"Uh, you're the human now, Zim." I pointed out, smirking and receiving a glare.

"What did you do, Zim!" Dib cried, removing his disguise, "Change us back right now!"

"You think I like this? This human disfigurement is just disgusting!"

"Awe, don't be too hard on yourself, you don't look too bad." I grinned, punching his arm playfully.

"Well what about me!" Dib cried, pulling on his antenna, "I look just like some movie monster!"

"Still got pretty eyes though." I muttered, giving him a wink.

Said eyes narrowed in frustration, "You're enjoying this aren't you?"

I shrugged, "A little. Why were you using that gun thing anyway?"

Zim waved his arm passively, "I was only going to swap the stink-beasts DNA with a chicken! But then you had to interfere."

"Don't blame me for that! You tried to shoot me, I wasn't going to just stand still was I?"

He ignored me and turned to point at Dib, "Well Dib-worm you won't have to worry about disgracing the Irken form much longer, the device is nearly fully charged and ready for use again soon." He waved his hand passively.

It wasn't sure if it was just me, but there was something about Zim's voice that sounded a little different. As he and Dib started to argue about how soon 'soon' was going to be, my ears strained to get a better grasp on it. Then, it hit me. Zim was talking with a slight lisp. I tilted my head in confusion.

"Zim, why are you talking like that?"

He paused in mid threat and glared at me. He straightened up and poked his human tongue out at me. At first I thought he was just being childish, I mean all I did was ask a question. But then he started pointing at it with annoyance and crossing his eyes to get a better view of it.

"This inferior human tongue!" he cursed, "It's so flat and pudgy! How do you speak with such a nuisance!"

"Well what about these!" Dib cried, pointing to his feelers, "I mean, do they even serve a purpose?"

"You'll get no answers from Zim!" the human snapped.

There was a heavy knock on the door. Zim huffed and turned to answer it. I looked at Dib who had discovered how to control his antenna. He pointed them upwards to the ceiling and then made them flatten against his head before repeating the progress. I giggled and reached up to stroke them. Like a puppy, he flinched before getting used to the sensation and pushing his head further into my palm. Suddenly he collected himself and ducked away.

"No, I shouldn't be liking that!" he stammered, shaking the feeling away from him, "It's too weird!"

I chuckled, "If you say so. Space-boy."

That gained me a glare and a soft punch in the arm. We turned at the sound of Zim giving a disturbed grunt at the door. He was frozen in shock as the visitor eyed him suspiciously. He backed away as she stepped forward into the house. The violet haired girl studied Zim inventively with her amber eyes, a cruel smirk on her face. I mirrored her smirk, I'd seen that look on her face before. It was rare and usually resulted in her making a comment before returning to her observing and sombre self.

"Welcome earthling," she raised her hand in the classic star-trek sign, "take me to your leader." She glanced at Dib, "Oh, there he is."

I snorted with laughter as Zim reddened and Dib clenched his fists in rage. As quickly as it had appeared, her smirk faded and she returned to her fixed scowl. She glared at her brother and folded her arms.

"You ate all of the cookies, you will buy more or else," she grabbed his arm and twisted it so that his three fingers arched from the strain in muscle, "this will be the last of your problems."

He gulped and nodded, his feelers flattening against his head in terror. She released him and plonked herself down on the sofa.

"How'd you know we were here?" I asked, recovering from laughter.

She looked at me with sarcasm, "You have met Dib right? Plus I could hear you two outside my room this morning."

"Sorry, it was a bit of a shock." I shrugged.

"So is his head on a normal day."

"Zim agrees." Zim nodded, regaining his motor skills.

I folded my arms and raised my eyebrows at him. No winners for guessing _why_ we agreed with her of all people. He glared at me warningly so I shrugged in defeat. Zim wrinkled his nose and crossed his eyes to look at it in disgust, hands tugging at his ears in repulsion.

"Computer, take us to the labs… if I spend one more minute in this state Zim shall surely regurgitate his insides."

"It's called throwing up, space-monster!" Dib snapped, "But… yeah… we should go."

I rolled my eyes. But my amusement was cut shot by the ground suddenly started to shake. A large circle that stretched from the sofa to the TV raised slightly out of the ground. Zim stepped onto it, tapping his foot and crossing his arms in impatience. The rest of us joined him on the platform before it gave another jolt and started lowering down again. The living room vanished from view above us and we were dropped to the labs. Dib widened his golden eyes, his antenna quirking in intrigue.

"There's another way down here! Man, I gotta remember this one!"

"Don't get any idea's stink-beast!"

"What like you're amazing ideas?" he retorted, puling Zim's new mop of hair.

Zim glared at him and tried to take a swipe at him with his hand but missed by centimetres. In retaliation, Dib threw himself at the alien, or rather, at the human, wow this was confusing. The two started scrapping on the floor, throwing punches and pulling at each others hair/feelers. Gaz and I exchanged a glance, it was best just to let them to it. After all, it was just an average day for us. The lift came to a sudden stop, jarring us and sending the two rolling along the tilled floor of the labs. I casually stepped over them and felt the air get knocked from me as something solid collided with me.

"Hi GIR." I gasped.

"Hi Amy-Cakes!" he grinned, "You gonna shoot Masta now?"

I swallowed at his choice in words, "Uh, possibly….?"

Gaz smirked, "I'll do it."

Something about the excited glint in her eyes made me on edge. Without hesitation, she removed the device from what I presumed was the charger, ironically enough it looked like a regular phone charger. Without even taking aim, she span around and pulled the trigger, embedding one dart into the back of Dib's head. He cried out in pain and tumbled away from his nemesis. Zim looked up with his humanoid eyes and locked them on Gaz. For a moment, she hesitated, but she quickly composed herself and fired. The dart hit him directly between the eyes. The wire connecting the two exploded with electricity, sending them convulsing rabidly from the shock. Finally, it stopped, allowing me to pull the darts away. Gaz released a slow breath.

"That was pretty cool actually."

I let out a dry laugh, "That's one word for it…"

GIR poked his unconscious master, "He still pink!" he tousled his hair, "And fuzzy!"

"Well, it took overnight to transform them in the first place, so it'll probably be a few hours before it changes them back."

"Good, this is just disturbing me." Gaz muttered.

"At least you didn't wake up to a worm-tongue in your mouth!" I sniggered.

She eyed me with a look that said 'too much info' and folded her arms grudgingly, "That would be a surprise to some, I guess."

My eyebrows vanished under my bangs, "Not to you then?"

She narrowed her eyes at me warningly, but I was positive that there was a hint of a blush. She swiftly composed herself and looked away. A shiver went down my spine and I really should have left it there, but I couldn't help but press the matter. If I died, people would no longer be warning kids about the cat who was killed by curiosity, it would be me.

"If you like him, then go for it, you might be surprised."

She aimed the device at me, it was out of charge and there were no more darts, but it was still pretty threatening to look down the barrel of a weapon. As if she suddenly noticed what she was doing, she dropped her arm and tossed it to the side.

"Whatever…" she muttered.

* * *

"What happened? Where am I? I'm not an alien!"

"Woah! Dib calm down!" I swear to god that boy made me jump out of my skin, "You're home, and no, you're not an alien."

It had been a good few hours since he'd been zapped again, and most of the time had been spent with me and Gaz dragging him home. He had regained a fever and had been writhing in his sleep as the DNA was altering. I had to say, it had been fascinating watching his skin fade back to its pale tone, and his hear grow back into its permanent spike. Seeing his nose, ears and fingers regenerate though… that had just been disturbing. He admired them with a goofy grin on his face and jumped off of his bed, reaching to feel his PAK-less back.

"Yeah!" he cried, pumping his fist in the air.

I laughed, "For some reason the reaction was faster in Zim, he woke up a while before you did."

His smile dropped, "Zim's here?"

"No, Gaz went back to check on him, I got a call from her a while ago saying he was back to normal."

"And she hasn't come back yet?"

I shrugged innocently, "So, ten fingers, that's gotta be awesome to have back!"

He could tell that I was changing the subject, but it still didn't stop him waving them in front of his eyes in glee. His eyes, returning to their human state were bright behind his glasses. I let him wrap his arms around my waist and lift me up to spin me.

"Man it's great to be human!" he cried.

I laughed and pushed him away, but he held on so that our chests were pressed together. He blushed.

"You know, there's one good thing about what happened?"

"What's that?" I asked, arching my brow.

He smirked, "That I know you'll give Zim what for if he ever made a move on you."

I remembered when Dib had kissed me in Irken form, his snake-like tongue taking me by surprise and his green face so close to mine. Admittedly, it had been a shock to the system, hence why I threw a punch as well as an alarm clock. But that's not why I was reddening at that moment. It was because of what I knew. And how clueless Dib was.

"Don't worry about that, he'd never make a move on me." I smiled knowingly, "He's got his eyes on someone else."

He narrowed his eyes, "Who? There's more Irkens around here? Who?"

A giggle escaped me at his total cluelessness. To stop him from questioning me further, I kissed him, deliberately lingering. When I pulled away, my cheeks felt like they were on fire at the question that I wanted to ask.

"W-would you, you know, want to have… a-another go at that… thing this morning?"

Dib tilted his head in confusion. To give him a subtly hint, I looked at the floor and gave my bottom lip a small smooth of the tongue. He blushed as realisation set in. He tensed and started babbling.

"Oh, uh, well if you w-want to, I… Uh, okay…"

"You don't have to if you're that nervous about it." I reassured.

His lips, quivering, leaned in and pressed against mine. For a while, we stayed like that, no one daring to make the first move. Slowly, he started to open my lips with his. Slowly, and anxiously, I felt something soft and warm smooth across into my mouth. My first instinct, from past experience, was to pull away, but that soon passed. This was how I had originally expected, only, better. There was no sharp pinch of claws, no sudden snake-like thing invading my space, it just felt like… Dib. That's all I can say to explain it. It was me and Dib.

However, if I'd opened my eyes, the moment would have been, well, altered to say the least. For as we were exploring this new part of each other, there was a green and pink figure in the window, secured to the side of the house by metallic spider-like legs. In his hands was a note-pad and pen, and he was scribbling notes on our movements with detail. As we broke apart, so did the figures grip on the house, sending him back to his base to look over his research, wondering if the cause of his mind infection would have the same positive reaction to him as I had to Dib.

And how do I know of this? Well, they say dead people don't talk; but hyperactive robots do… especially when you give them cake…


	7. Why did Things Change?

**When Zim calls Amy a new name, she doesn't like it and she demands to know his reasoning for it. But when she breaks into the base late at night and corners him, she doesn't get the answer she was expecting. Set after the Birthday fic. Paragraphs in italics are flashbacks to the "An Adventure of my Own" fic. **

I really couldn't sleep that night, his comment had been lulling over my brain for hours and it didn't seem to be going anywhere. He'd never called me that before. And I didn't like it. It wasn't like me and Dib were even doing anything wrong! We were just walking past the house when he leant out of the front door, shaking his fist in his usual manner and just screamed it.

"Think about breaking in here again and it'll be the last thing you ever to Dib-smell! And same goes for you, weakness!"

I'd never been called 'weakness' before, I mean, I'd been called weak… But never labelled as 'weakness'. It didn't sit right, and it seemed pretty out of order. Why had he called me that? By now I was pretty used to being called all sorts from the resides of that house. Amy-Cakes, Amy-beast, Amy-worm, even cake-lady at one point and even earth-filth. And yet, this one struck me hardest. No, I didn't have to lay here and lose sleep over this!

Tossing the covers aside and getting dressed, I opened my window and peered outwards. The drainpipe was fixed pretty close, thankfully. My hands wrapped around it as the rest of my body swung around to grip it with my trainers. Don't look down, I'd only even done this once before and it didn't end well, don't look down! Slowly but surely, I started to lower myself until I lost my footing and ended up skidding straight down to the ground. I hissed in pain as the skin along the outside of my forearm was gashed. A trickle of blood dripped on the ground. I gritted my teeth in pain and removed my old jacket from my waist and wrapped it around my wound. I'd gone too far to turn back at something like a scrape. Resisting the urge to hug the grass, I sprinted off to the house next door. I knew by now that he wouldn't answer the door at this hour, he'd be too suspicious for that. Instead, I tried my luck with the window, but that was just pushing my – oh wow it was open! Thank you GIR.

I realised how cold it was outside from how the warmth made my fingers tingle. But it wasn't warmth I was here for, it was answers. My mind flashed back to the first time I'd wondered into this house, or rather, been dragged inside by GIR. And how he'd stripped of his doggie suit and jumped down the toilet, getting me to follow him. Speaking of which, I went to the kitchen and stood inside the toilet bowl. Honestly, every time I do this I swear to god I feel like I'm making it up… The lift took me down into the lower levels of the base where I was hoping Zim was going to be. I'd probably only ever seen an eighth of this base, there was so much to it and so many rooms, I wondered if I'd ever see it all. And if I'd find Zim come to think of it. Irkens didn't sleep, so at this hour, he really could be anywhere.

"Zim!" I called, jumping as my voice bounced off of the walls, "Zim are you here?"

"Where else would Zim be, human?"

I span around to see the alien leaning against the elevator doors, looking tired and irritable, holding a bag of what looked like sugar cubes. He popped one into his mouth, and yet he looked repulsed by the taste.

"Don't eat them if you don't like them." I scoffed.

"Zim does like them, he is simply using them to rid himself of the other horrible taste in his mouth!" he glared at my bandaged arm and gagged slightly, "Zim could taste _that _in the air before you even reached the base."

Oh yeah, I remembered, Zim's tongue was snake-like, so it could also taste scents in the air, like my blood right now for example. Instinctively, I pulled the jacket around it tighter, to which Zim rolled his dark pink eyes in annoyance. He stormed to a cabinet and pulled out a box. From inside, he produced a bottle of strange looking liquid and a roll of white gauze. He peeled back the jacket gingerly and dripped the liquid onto my wound. I tried to ignore the smirk he gave as it burned my skin and gritted my teeth. Once he had finished, the bandage was wrapped around my arm and he grudgingly popped another sugar cube into his mouth.

"So, what reason has the Amy-worm to interrupt her sleeping pattern and _honour_ Zim with her presence?" he asked, dripping with sarcasm.

I chewed my lip, I'd almost forgotten why I'd come here in the first place, "I just wanted to ask you something." When he didn't answer, I continued, "Earlier today, you shouted at me and Dib… and you called me something. You called me 'weakness', and I want to know why?"

He tilted his head, "Zim calls you humans by many names. What made this one so different to invoke such a reaction?"

I was about to ask him what he meant by reaction. But then I noticed that my hands had clenched into fists and I was glaring at him. Not to mention that I'd broken into his house in the first place…

"It's the first time you've called me something like that. And I didn't like it. So, why did you call me that?"

He waved his hand passively, "Zim had called you weak before. A few weeks after we met and Zim was so gracious as to reveal the Dib's true intentions."

"No, you started to call me weak, but then you changed track, remember?"

_"What? I thought that you'd be happy now, you have one less enemy to worry about."_

_He shifted uncomfortably, "In truth, I never actually saw you as, well, an enemy."_

_"How come?"_

_"Mainly because you're too… weak." He flinched at my glare, "I mean, you're too smooshy on the inside." I glared harder, "Nice, okay, you're too nice to be an enemy!"_

_I think I just got my first complement from Zim… Weird, but in a good way._

"You were different back then, you know." I sighed.

"How so?" he snapped, "Zim was Zim then and Zim is Zim now!"

"In that sense, yeah, but… When we first met, we didn't really interact that much apart from me helping Dib with research and pulling you two apart if fights got too out of hand. Then, you told me about Dib and we got kidnapped… you were a lot more open towards me. You even burned down a flipping airport to stop me from going back to the U.K! But, now… it's like, the only time we speak is when we're giving sarcastic comments or empty threats."

Once I'd started I couldn't stop. It was true though, wasn't it? Over time it was like we were turning into enemies. I didn't know how it happened, but we'd grown harsher towards each other and that small soft stop that I'd found in Zim, it had crusted over. By the looks of him, he seemed to understand me. He listened to me intensively and tapped his chin in thought.

"Zim admits, that you were not the push-over you once were. And Zim had, in turn, grown more wary of you."

"But why? What have I done?"

He opened his mouth to answer, but collected himself and brushed it off, "Nothing of concern."

"No, tell me! You don't go admitting to it if you're not going to explain it! So go on, I'm waiting, and you know me well enough that I'm not going anywhere until -"

"YOU PICKED A SIDE YOU STUPID HUMAN!"

The force of his voice made me stumble backwards. He glared at me, his maroon eyes quivering and his antenna flattened against his head. He panted in anger as he looked at me. I swallowed, what was that supposed to mean. Not able to summon the words, he continued.

"You picked a side!" he repeated quieter but by no means less malicious, "You made this big fuss about how you could not choose between Zim and the Dib because of the _good _you saw in both of us and copped out by claiming GIR as a choice! And then you ignore that verbal commitment by giving in to the Dib! Oh don't try and fool me, human, it had been clear to Zim that the Dib had chosen his mate from the start and that she returned the gesture! That did not bother me! As you know Zim has a mate in mind of his own! But never did he expect it to worm its way into your brain and alter the very morals you once stood for! You turned your back on all that was once your beliefs and chose! You chose the Dib! And as such chose to make Zim an enemy!" he pointed at me warningly, "And _that_, Amy-worm, is why you are just _weakness_!"

His words hit me like bullets. I had no idea that he was this angry at me. Yeah, I did know that he liked Gaz, he'd even asked for my advice a few times, much to his annoyance. And I had a clue that he wasn't best pleased that me and Dib had started dating, he was his arch-nemesis after all. But I had no clue that he saw it as me picking a side. Thinking about it, I had helped out Dib more times that Zim, but that wasn't because of me making choice, I just helped out whoever needed it. And Dib got into more trouble than Zim, in all honesty. Guilt was building up like a dead weight in the pit of my stomach. I tried to place a hand on his shoulder, but he smacked it away. A small tear trickled down my face.

"Zim…" I didn't know where to start, "I'm so sorry… But, you're wrong, my choice still stands, I'm still in the middle, like GIR. Just because me and Dib are, _mates_ now," the choice in word made me cringe, "has no effect on how I feel about you! You will never be my enemy and I will never do anything to hurt you, you know that! Is that why you've been a lot harsher towards me, because you think I'm trying to expose you like Dib?"

He folded his arms, "Zim does not think this, he knows it."

"You're wrong!" I cried, "I'd never do that! You say I've turned my back on my morals, what were they? That no one deserves to be experimented on or dissected? That you've created a life here so there's no point in you taking over Earth because it's your home? That I think that you are a good guy? Well I still believe all those things! And there's one thing I still believe and that is that you are _not_ my enemy and never will be!"

He blinked, "Zim does not see it that way."

"Then that's your choice, I don't know what else I can do to convince you. Zim, Dib may be my 'mate', but you're still my friend, actually, you're more than a friend to me you're…"

He arched his brow, "Zim is what?"

Yeah, Zim is what? Well, Zim was many things, but how to collect them into a label was more difficult that I thought. One minute we hated each other, the next we were passing playful banter. One minute he would be going on about how he hated all human life, the next he was asking me why he couldn't get the image of a certain Dib-sibling out of his head. He was confusing and loud and egotistical, yet it was funny and occasionally a little charming in his own way. And to me… to me he was like my…

_"OW! What the Irk was that? Did an asteroid hit Zim?" Zim cried, clutching his cheek._

_No, it was no asteroid. It was my fist. Dib laughed and gave me a round of applause while GIR stared at me in awe._

_"That's for leaving us and having the cheek to wave!" I spat, but then I softened my expression and started gently stroking his feelers, "And that's for saving us, thank you."_

_He slouched slightly and nudged his head further into my hand and then snapped himself out of it, "No more, filthy human!"_

_"Oh I see, you'd rather me give it a sharp tug, like Gaz does?" I asked playfully, winking._

_Zims face flushed while Dibs burned._

_"What's that mean?" Dib demanded._

_"Nothing." me and Zim said in unison, me calm and coy, him loud and desperate._

"Answer Zim!" he snapped.

I smirked, "To me, you're like… a brother."

His eyes narrowed and he folded his arms, "Explain yourself."

I shrugged, "Well, we argue and yet we have a pretty good laugh from time to time. We sort of look out for each other," I lifted my arm to make a point, "You hate my boyfriend and you seem to come to me for advice for whatever reason. We're not enemies, Zim, and I'm sorry if I ever made you feel like we were."

He faltered slightly and tapped his chin in thought, "Brother? As in sibling?"

I nodded softly, "Look at the relationship between Gaz and Dib, see anything similar there?"

For a second, I was sure a smirk twitched at the corner of his mouth. He'd watched those two long enough to understand how things worked. They acted like they weren't part of each other life, and yet they did look out for each other, after all, pretty much all they had was each other. A solid outer shell of a barrier was formed between them, yet instead of solid concrete all the way through, the inside was as soft as cotton wool. Zim and I were the same. He'd insult me, I'd wind him up, but we'd also saved one another many a time. Plus, Zim was kind of acting like a child, feeling abandoned and left out, like he'd lost a friend and was acting out through anger. I didn't blame him, I'd changed too over time. And I'd never felt more guilty. Yeah, he was like a little brother. A little brother that acted tough and like he could stand alone, but still needed to know that his big sis was still there if need be.

"Zim has to admit that there are come similarities, but to be registered as a sibling to a human would be an insult!"

I smirked, "If that's how you feel." I turned to leave, "I am really sorry Zim, I'm still your friend, no matter what. I promise."

His antenna quirked, he'd registered by now that promises meant the world to me. He'd never seen me break one, and didn't trust himself to make one of his own. But that one word seemed to stick with him, he knew I was serious.

"Amy-worm!"

I stopped and felt him tap me lightly on the shoulder. Turning to face him, I saw the glint in his eyes that I rarely saw. He pursed his lips and folded his arms in a huff.

"If it means _that_ much to you're inferior brain, then…" He shifted, "Then possibly Zim could persevere with the label, for now."

I grinned and before he could react, I threw my arms around him in an embrace. He tensed and I could picture the look of horror on his face. But I wasn't letting go, not now.

"You know, I've always wanted a brother." I smirked, deliberately making him more awkward.

What I didn't expect however, was for him to in turn place his arms around me. It was strange, but I liked it.

"Oh, and how the great Zim _adores_ his sibling."

I froze, there was something in his tone that was off. It was forced and overly happy, hinted with sarcasm and knowing. Just as I was about to pull away, his grip tightened suddenly, squeezing the air from me. At first I thought it was that moment in a hug where you hold the person a little tighter before letting go, but he wasn't letting go. He was forcing the air out of me, I could almost hear my back cracking!

"Zim, I'm glad we're okay now, but I can't breathe!"

He smirked wryly, giving one last forceful tug before releasing me, looking over-the-top innocent, "Oh so sorry, Amy-beast! Zim just doesn't know his own strength sometimes!"

I drank in the air and rolled my eyes, "Sure you don't." I caught my breath and looked at him, "We are okay now, right?"

He shrugged, "I shall give you the satisfaction of reassuring me, just this once, but do not go blabbing that you claim Zim to be a sibling, the repulsion is too great."

Smirking, I chose to take my leave, "I'll see you around, bro."

Zim shifted and thought back to a TV show he'd seen, "Uh, back at ya… sista?" he mumbled, unsure of the tone.

I snorted with laughter, "Never do that again." I waved and climbed into the elevator.

As I was about to be lifted up, Zim called after me, "So, should Zim think of the Gaz-worm as a sibling too?"

"You think of her how you want, sibling, mate, friend, whatever you feel like." I answered, vanishing from view.

I walked through the living room and left through the front door. As I was making my way back towards the side of my house, I couldn't help but smile. So Zim really was like an insecure child, he didn't want to feel like the closest thing to a friend he'd had was being taken away… That was so unlike him, and yet made total sense. Brother? Yeah, he was like a little brother. He was still pretty new to this planet and searched for answers, and I felt like I had to answer him. I'd never had a brother before. I mean I'd always seen GIR as a brother but that's just because of his childish nature and innocence. Zim, a brother? Yeah… I liked that.

"Amy!"

I cried out in surprise and span around to see a shadow-like figure sprinting towards me. The moonlight reflected off of his glasses and wove into his raven hair.

"Dib? Seriously, keep it down!" I sniggered.

"My radar around Zim's house went off saying that someone broke in, I came to see if you were okay!" he babbled, not keeping his voice down at all, he glanced at my arm, "What did that space-monster do? Man, he's gonna get it this time!"

I grabbed his arm to stop him, "Dib, he didn't do this; I did it on the drainpipe. I just went to visit him for a bit. Anyway, Zim would never hurt his sister…"

"Oh, right okay…" he jarred and glared at me, pointing an accusing finger at me, "Wait! Sister?"

I smacked my palm to my face, me and my big mouth!

_This was killing me. What do I do? If I went with Dib, I'd be hunting Zim every day, but also be having adventures discovering the paranormal and the extraordinary, and maybe even discover some more about each other... But if I chose to go with Zim, I'd defiantly lose Dib as a friend and be expected to enslave my own kind, but I'd be flying through the stars and taking part in extraterrestrial matters along the galaxy. Pros and cons were equally balanced. I was stuck. But a choice had to be made._

_I sighed, "Okay, I've chosen whose side I'm going to be on."_

_The waited, breath baited._

_"I think that if I'm going to be on anyone's side, which I disagree with by the way, but if I really have to... I would be on..."_

_Here we go, prepare for disgust and outrage._

_"GIR's side." I said, allowing him to jump onto my back with glee._

_The two boys stared back at me in horror, "WHAT?" the cried in unison._

_I smirked, "Well, GIR likes the two of you, and he's helped you both out from time to time. He doesn't see the two of you as sides to be picked, he just enjoys being in either's company, having fun, and that seems like a pretty good place to be all things considered."_

_They were gobsmacked. I didn't blame them. Some might say that it was a cop-out decision, but I could never choose. They were both too special to me. I did really like them and care about them both, but like I said before, in different ways. No one has ever had a go at GIR for it before, so it's not fair to change the rules for me._

_"No, that's not fair!" Dib cried._

_"Deceiver!" Zim yelled._

_"You never said I couldn't do that!" I pointed out, "And my choice has been made. Dib, I'll help you with your studies, but I'm not going to put Zim in danger of being exposed either. Plus, someone's got to be on the sidelines making sure the two of you don't beat each other up too much!"_

_The pair of them fought with their frustrations for a long time. Each one trying to change my mind but it wasn't working. If GIR was in the middle, so was I. That way I managed to keep both friendships and get twice the adventure. Helping an alien race while also protecting my own. The best of both, you could say._

**A/N:**

**I was feeling sentimental and I re-read over the "An Adventure of my Own" story and noticed how much the characters had changed towards each other over time and thought, well where did this come from? So I made this. Hope you liked it XD**


	8. Fathers Day oh fun

Okay Amy, you can do this. All you have to do it dial the number and wait. There's no way he's going to do that to you again… for the – No, don't try and count! Everything will be fine and okay and this time it's going to be different. Now come on, dial the number. The phone is in your hand and working fine. Just dial. And stop going off on random trail of thoughts!

My fingers fumbled at the numbers and I found that I wasn't actually breathing. What was wrong with me? This was no big deal! The phone connected and started ringing, each tone like a set of knives in my ear. Finally, someone at the other end of the line picked up. Okay, here goes…

"Hey dad!"

A pause, "Oh hi Ames, how's things?"

"Great, yeah good thanks, uh, you?"

"Good, good thanks."

Not the awkward pause, no! Must avoid! "So I was wondering what time you're landing tomorrow."

"Landing?"

Oh no… "Landing, in the plane. Remember we arranged a few weeks ago that you were going to come up and visit? For… Fathers Day?"

He was hesitating, "Oh right! Oh sorry baby, you know I actually booked my ticket and everything but…"

I bit my lip to stop it quivering, "But they lost your booking information, right?"

"Yeah, that's right!" seriously, he gave a sigh of relief!

"Weird, they did that last year and at Christmas too." I tried to hide the bitterness in my tone, but it wasn't easy.

"Well, you know how things go, baby. But hey, maybe you could come down here for a few days, the girls miss you."

The girls, my two other half-sisters and my step-mother. Thanks, use emotional blackmail, I bet the girls don't even remember my name. And I did go to visit my family for a week in the summer holidays and he made excuses then!

"Yeah, I'll try… I miss them as well. I miss you too."

"Miss you too baby. Look I got to go but it's great to hear from you and I'm sorry about that."

"No, it's fine… H-happy fathers day."

"Thanks baby, bye now."

"B-"

The dial tone was playing before I even finished a single syllable. For a moment, I was frozen in position. Really, what did I expect? He had been the same even when I was living in the U.K. He just… didn't care. He had his own family now and I was just baggage. Hey, maybe I will go to the airport, they can lose me if I'm I register under his name. There was a crash as I slammed the phone back down into its handle. I was disgusted to find that tears were slipping down my cheeks, he wasn't worth them. Not again. I couldn't believe he did it again to me. No, actually, I could. But, no this wasn't fair!

"Amy? Did you ring him?" I turned around to face my mother. She took one look at my flaming cheeks and damp eyes and pulled me into a hug. "It's okay, love, it's okay…" she hushed, stroking my hair.

"Every time! He clearly doesn't want a daughter so now he doesn't have to have one!"

She released me and picked up the phone, "No, he's not getting away with that. No one makes my girl feel like this."

"Mum just leave it, please."

"What the hell is wrong with you?" she was already talking to him.

I couldn't deal with this right now. Pointing over my shoulder with my thumb, I indicated to mum that I was going out. So I did. Without even thinking, I made my way to the park, tears streaming down my face. Back in my old home, whenever I was upset, I always went to the park and went right for the swings. There was something about feeling like flying and the rhythmic motion that just took the feeling out of me. So that's what I focused on.

My eyes clenched shut, the last of my tears falling away in the wind. I leant right back so that on the way backwards, my hair trailed along the gravel. The wind whistled past me at a surprising rate. The motion and the darkness made me feel slightly queasy, but I rather that than anything else at that time. Pain and rejected. All of a sudden as I was swinging downwards, my feet collided with something solid.

"AGH! For the love of Irk!"

I skidded to a stop and looked at the figure that I'd sent flying across the park. It looked up and glared at me while gripping its cheek in pain.

"Are the Amy-worms shoes made from brick?" it snapped.

"I am so sorry Zim!" I gasped, helping him to his feet.

"Nice shot, you got him!" Dib rushed up to us and shook my shoulder with excitement, "You're gonna get it now Space boy!"

"Get what? You're doom?"

I rolled my eyes, "As you were, gentlemen."

I turned back to head… somewhere. Not home yet, that's for sure, but just somewhere else. Really, I wasn't in any mood to go and join in and be around people today. However, I was stopped by someone harshly spinning me around. Zim eyed me curiously, flinching at the sight of a few leftover tears from earlier.

"Amy? What's up?" Dib asked.

"She's leaking from the eye sockets! Clearly this defence mechanism is a signal to back away." Zim muttered, holding out his hands in preparation for an attack.

"I'm fine, I just… I'm fine." I rubbed my eyes, "No defence mechanism and nothing is up. I just, feel like being alone at the moment, please."

Zim smirked, "Then Zim shall not leave you alone! HA! Victory for…" he trailed off at my most evil looking glare, "Zim has other things to do anyway…"

"Uh, I'm, you know, here if you need me." Dib muttered.

I nodded and walked off in the other direction. Admittedly, I did feel guilty at brushing them off like that, but I really didn't want to be around people. Especially people I cared about. I didn't stop until I reached the farthest side of the park and sat myself down on a bench. It was quiet, it was isolated, and it was lonely. Just what I wanted.

The sky was starting to turn dark, but I still wasn't nearly done being alone. Maybe I should have forced myself into socialising, but it didn't seem fair bringing them down with my mood. No, the best thing was just to wait until I felt up to going home, and then make a big effort tomorrow. No, I couldn't do that, it was Fathers Day tomorrow, they'd all be busy. Well, not Zim maybe… Oh I don't know!

"Bit late, isn't it?"

I flinched at the monotone d voice next to me. In the gloom, as well as the flickering lights from a gaming device, I could make out a rounded, pale face with squinted amber eyes and topped with defining violet hair. She raised an eyebrow expectantly at me.

"Oh, hi Gaz. What's up?" I asked, catching my breath.

She shrugged, "Same old, I guess. You?" she asked like she had to, not because she wanted to.

"Same old." I nodded.

"It's a stupid holiday, Fathers Day. Right?"

I jarred at her words, "How'd you know I was upset about that?"

She smirked, "I didn't. But that takes the guess work away. So, what's up?"

"You don't have to ask me that, you know, I don't expect anyone to listen to my problems."

"I'm aware." She shrugged, "Yet, I asked."

"Yeah, and prepare to regret it…"

Before I could stop myself, the words came flooding out. About what had happened with my dad, how he had done it hundreds of times before, how it was like he didn't want me in his life. All of it. His new family clearly meant more to him. He couldn't even make an effort to see me even when I was in the U.K! Tears couldn't help but spill down my face, dripping from my chin and staining my jeans. I sniffed and tried to clean myself up. Now I was just embarrassing myself. Gaz didn't give any hint that she'd been listening to me throughout my venting, but it was still good to get it out in the open. As I came to an end, she snapped her G.S.2 closed and sighed, folding her arms and arching her brow at me.

"Well, I certainly did ask for it." She stated.

"I'm sorry."

"Stop apologising," she ordered, a hint of irritation in her tone, "I'm not denying you ability to be miffed. If you're miffed, then you're miffed. And for the record, it's not like anything you're telling me is big news."

My eyes widened in realisation, "Oh god, me and my big mouth, I'm so sorry, I didn't think!"

It wasn't like she had the best relationship with her dad either and here I was moaning about mine. She never complained about it and never made a fuss. I felt horrible, like I had been rubbing it in her face. My hands ran through my hair in frustration. Gaz however, just smirked at me, as if she was taking amusement in my discomfort.

"First of all, if you apologise aimlessly one more time, I will do something that shall make you sorry you ever learnt that word. Secondly, it's no big deal. Some parents are just cruddy at being parents sometimes."

I sighed, "I guess…"

"And you have your mom."

I smiled, "Yeah, she's been like two parents in one."

"So you're not missing anything." She shrugged, flicking back to her game.

That was also true. "I guess. I suppose it's not the fact that he doesn't see me, it's that he always builds up and then lets me down. If he just straight up said he wasn't going to show up, then that'd be a bit better. But why get my hopes up first?"

"Then stop expecting him to be there, then you won't get disappointed. Works for me."

That's right, her dad didn't even live with them that often. Dib was always left to care for Gaz on his own. They had an annual day of the year where they actually got to go out somewhere with him, and that was just for a few hours. That was no way to live. I never agreed with it, even if I did agree not to interfere… again. But at least they knew where they stood with him.

No, no they didn't really. That was true, Gaz didn't get her hopes up and always just went along with what was going on around her, that way she was always in control of herself and didn't get disappointed. Dib, he was always trying to please his dad, that's why he was so determined to prove his paranormal theories, because he wanted to clear his name and stop being an 'embarrassment' to him. No, they didn't know where they stood. And whereas I had my mum, they only had each other.

"So… what do you do on Fathers Day?" I asked after a thoughtful pause.

She shrugged, "Send a card to his assistant to pass on. But we send it three months in advance so that it reaches him on time."

"You don't meet up with him?"

"He works, and it's not on family night. He sends a computer monitor to video-chat from his labs for bit too." She arched an eyebrow, "So what will you do?"

I shrugged, "Just a normal day now I guess."

She smirked at my dry humour, "Normal?"

"Well, normal for us." I corrected, grinning a little.

For some reason, I was feeling a little better. Gaz had such a laid back attitude with this kind of thing, and it was pretty infectious. She had a point, it was just another day, and I really wasn't missing out on anything. Really, it was my dads loss if he couldn't be bothered. And from now on, he could get in contact with me, I was sick of giving him the benefit of the doubt all the time. If he wanted to fix this, then I'd be willing to listen to him, but until then, I still had my mum and my friends.

I was still a little annoyed with Professor Membrane though, naturally, but a promise was a promise and I wasn't going to interfere. But he really should get more involved with his children, it wasn't like he was living in a different country! But still, they seemed okay.

"You know, whenever dad lets me down, mum always tries to cheer me up by making a big meal the next day. Do you and Dib want to join in? You know, after your dad has called."

She shrugged, "I'll pass on the message."

I smirked, "I was thinking about asking Zim too, considering he won't be celebrating either."

She flushed a little, but held her game away from her face to hide it in the gloom, "I've got nothing better to do, why not."

She got to her feet to leave.

"Oh Gaz," she paused, "Thanks."

She arched her brow in confusion at the gesture, but her expression softened slightly, "Well, that's better than another apology I guess. And don't mention it."

She vanished like a shadow into the gloom. I figured that maybe it was time for me to head home myself. After talking to Gaz, I really did feel loads better. Who knew that she of all people would have words of wisdom for me? It really wasn't a big deal about dad, and now I had all my friends coming over too. Sounded like a pretty good day planned to me. As soon as I walked in the front door, I was caged into a hug from my mum, to which I gratefully returned.

"How you feeling, love?" she asked.

"Loads better." I grinned, "What did he say when I left?"

"Same old excuses, idiot man, don't worry, he's not worth it."

"I know… Hey, about tomorrow…"

**A/N:**

**I'm sorry about this fic, I was feeling a little angsty thanks to issues with my own life and just needed to get it out without shouting like a scary monkey XD Plus, I feel like I've been leaving Gaz out a lot and only using her as plot points with Zim, so it was good to try and give her a scene where she was in character, but still trying to help. Hope you like it, and I'm sorry again about the dad-anger thingy, but we all have our moments… XD**


	9. Never Trick a Trickster

**A/N:**

**This is dedicated to 'MadHattressX3' who gave me this idea from many much appreciated reviews. Hope you like it and I hope it satisfies your ZaAr preference XD**

**Zim asks Amy for relationship advice again, and after last time Amy is not that eager to go ahead with it. But when Zim blasts her with a love-spray, will she have a choice? Set not long after my other one-shot "What is this Infection?", so before the birthday fic, so Dib and Amy aren't together yet.**

When I received an urgent message from Zim that morning, I really didn't know what to expect. But, it's Zim so, when _do_ I know what to expect? So, expect the unexpected. But that's so much of a paradox that it makes my head hurt! Instead, there wasn't much else for me to do other than take a long breath, and knock on the door. It opened instantly and a black gloved hand snatched out and hoisted me inside. I stumbled and turned around just in time to see the door slam shut behind me. Zim nodded in acknowledgment at me and clasped his hands together. Wow, he sure was eager to get to the point.

"Zim has a proposition for you." He said bluntly.

I smirked and folded my arms, "Hi, I'm great thanks for asking, Zim, and how are you?"

He tilted his head in confusion, "Zim asked you nothing. Was the Amy-worm not listening? Zim has a proposition for you. But to answer your question, Zim is feeling fine."

I rolled my eyes, giving up on my sarcasm, "Okay, I'm listening, what proposition?"

He shifted awkwardly, "You recall when Zim required your advice on that… _crush_ infection that the Dib-sibling as placed in me?"

Oh I recalled it alright! He'd charmingly managed to capture me in his labs and start accusing me and the rest of the female population of having the ability to infect the minds of males so that they become unable to think about anything else for long periods of time. I also recalled explaining that he just had a crush on someone, which he let slip soon after that it was Gaz. No shock there. Oh and what else? Oh yes, I recalled how I'd told him to pretend that I was Gaz and for him to try and practice making a move… and them him slamming me into the wall with god knows what in mind!

I nodded, "Yes, I recall."

"Well, as has been no doubt evident, Zim has yet to act upon it." He cleared his throat, "But he would like to."

"Okay… so what's stopping you?"

"It's the Dib-sibling!" he cried, "Her infection causes Zim's throat to turn on its owner and close!"

I smirked, "Awe, that's kind of sweet."

He glared at me, "Sweet? The near suffocation of Zim is _sweet_?"

"Well, no, but it's sweet how nervous you are around her." I was starting to relax a little, "So, go on, what you need me for?"

He looked at the floor, clearly hating himself right now, "Zim requires the Amy-worm to… act like the Gaz-human. So that… Zim could… practice talking to… her."

I relaxed at the wrong moment. Instantly I tensed up and backed away, arms stretched out to create distance between us.

"No, I'm sorry Zim but the first time this was suggested I was pinned against a wall and you looked like you were gonna eat me!"

He scoffed, "Pfft, I wouldn't eat a human! And besides, you of all earth-maggots wish for this pairing between Zim and the Dib-sister the most!"

"That's true, but I'm still not being your test subject, why can't you use someone else?"

"Like who? GIR is not an acceptable match, neither is computer and it doesn't bare thinking about to consider the Dib!"

"So what makes me a match?"

He eyed me, "You're female, and you do not require the trouble of kidnapping. Also, you seem to express a fondness for Zim and that will also be useful."

My jaw hung open, "Okay, firstly you're my friend and that's what the 'fondness' is, secondly you can't go around kidnapping people, and thirdly; don't be so sexist!"

He smirked at me, "Oh Amy-worm, so naïve. You see, Zim requires practice in order to gain the Gaz-humans affections… And you will help me, willingly or not."

I swallowed, "What's that supposed to mean?"

From his PAK, he pulled out a small glass tube filled with a translucent purple liquid. The top was fixed with a spray nozzle, tightly screwed into place. He aimed it at me threateningly. With a snap of his fingers, a thick tube shot down from the ceiling and bound itself around me. I was lifted a few inches off the ground, my arms and legs trapped in place from the wires. There was no point in struggling, but that wasn't stopping me. Zim stepped closer and aimed the nozzle right between my eyes.

"Zim's answer is here; in this little glass vial."

I couldn't resist, "A little glass vial?"

He nodded, "A little glass vial."

**A/N: If you don't get the 'little glass vial' joke, look up the film 'Repo: The Genetic Opera' and look at the song 'Zydrate Anatomy'. Awesome film and awesome song! You will get it after hearing the song. **

Zim continued, "One spray of this, and this 'friendship' you express for Zim, shall be magnified to such an extent that even you shall think that it's an infatuation. You see, it's not just females who can create an infection of the mind." He smirked.

My eyes widened, "So that's your plan B? Make me think that I've got a crush on you so that you can practice talking to Gaz? Zim, that's just stupid! If I have a crush on you, then that's just going to cause more problems! Me and Gaz are totally different people, you're not going to get the same reactions from her that you'll get from me. You're like my brother, it would just be weird! Plus, why do you need me to crush on you for this to work in the first place?"

"Because, human, you claim that Gaz 'crushes' on Zim, therefore, the reactions shall in deed be similar." He nodded at his own logic.

"No, Zim, they really won't." I groaned.

"Silence! Now, lets begin."

"Wait!" I cried just as his finger tightened around the nozzle, "It's temporary, right? The spray wears off, yeah?"

He rolled his eyes, "Naturally, you didn't think Zim would wish for your infatuation for longer than needed, did you?" he scoffed, "Do not flatter yourself, human!"

"How long?"

"A few hours at most." He shrugged and smiled wryly and changed his tone to sound sarcastic, "Zim really appreciates the Amy-beast helping like this."

"Don't mention it." I said this mirrored sarcasm and narrowed my eyes in distain, "I'm so going to get you for this…"

As an answer, he simple shrugged passively and tightened his grip. The icy liquid coated my face and stung my eyes a little. It smelled sickly sweet, and also a little like cut grass. It itched the inside of my nose and started to make me cough. I tried to blink away the soreness in my eyes but it seemed to get worse. In a matter of seconds, my eyes refused to open altogether. I coughed and spluttered, but they sounded weaker. Soon, I was barely making a sound. Numb and swallowed in darkness, I blacked out.

When I awoke, I had been released from my binds and was laying on the sofa. My eyes still stung a little, but it wasn't too bad and at least the coughing had stopped. The sweet smell still lingered on my skin though. Zim was no where in sight. Weird, I didn't feel anything different for him. He was still a reluctant friend in my mind, and I was still feeling pretty miffed at him. Oh as soon as I got my hands on him, he won't know what hit him. Well, my fist would, that's for sure! So wait, did this mean that the spray stuff didn't work? I don't get it… I was glad but just didn't get it.

**Confused?**

I cried out in surprise at the bored sounding voice that seemed to echo from above me, "Uh, yeah little?" I muttered, searching for the voice.

**You didn't think Masters' invention was going to work, did you?**

Of course! Zim's computer! Wow I hadn't spoken to him in a long time. But wait, what did he just say?

"So, it really didn't work?" I asked.

**No…** it yawned, **If you were male it would have worked.**

"What d'you mean?"

**Well, he's been making the concoction in the mindset of infatuating females, but the only test subjects he's had to take DNA from and test the spray on have been –**

"Males…"

I was thinking of Nick the creepy kid that Zim kept in the basement. And surely Zim must have used some part of himself in the mixture to make people think of him specifically… So all of the things involved in the liquid had been from guys, therefore it would only work on them! It was like that movie where the man tries to create the best smelling perfume ever, but makes it out of women he's killed, and it makes any women who smell it goes insane for it! But, this was in reverse, and I doubt that Zim had actually killed anyone. Oh Zim, you idiot! I couldn't help but laugh, not just for my own relief but also for the fun I'd have watching Zim trying to use it on other people.

"So, what happens now?" I asked, "What happens when Zim comes back?"

It groaned, **I don't care… just figured you should know. Bye now…**

I didn't bother trying to keep talking. Computer had given me enough answers. Oh Zim, you annoying little… Hmmm, actually, this could be used to my advantage. Zim wanted me to have a temporary crush on him so he could know how to deal with girls, right? He wanted me to be, what was the word, infatuated with him, right? And how do I normally deal with Zim? Kill with kindness, the perfect revenge. Okay Zim, you asked for it!

The humming sound of the kitchen elevator sounded from the next room. Now was my chance. I slapped both my cheeks harshly so that they turned a rosy colour, that way he would think that I was blushing at him. As soon as he walked in the room, he eyed me carefully. Tossing my pride aside, I smiled shyly at him and wrung my hands, not making direct eye contact with him.

"Oh, uh, hi Zim…" I said, forcing my tone to sound shy too.

I lifted my head a little so that my hair fell back, revealing my flushed cheeks. If he bought this crap, then I was set. His antenna quirked and he took another step forward, still not sure how to respond to this greeting.

"And… how is the Amy-worm feeling?" he asked cautiously.

"A lot better, now that you're here." I bit my tongue to stop myself from laughing.

He nodded in approval, smiling wryly. "And how does Zim affect the human?"

Okay, not I had to sell it big time! Wow I was so ticked off with him right then, it took a lot not to swing for him! But I composed myself, if he figured out that the spray didn't work, then his revenge plan was going nowhere and I'd be in big trouble. I got to my feet and closed the distance between us. My hand rested softly on his shoulder, slowly tracing up and down his arm. I blinked slowly and looked at him dead in the eyes, smiling softly.

"I don't think I should say…" I winked.

He tensed and took a quick step backwards, holding his palms up defensively. When there was enough of a gap between us, he grinned and pumped a fist in the air triumphantly.

"Success!" he cried, "It worked better than expected! Now, Amy-human, you are aware that you are just in this state so that Zim can practice his strategy, right?"

Now how would a love-struck girl react to this? I sighed heavily and bit my lip in apparent disappointment. My eyes blinked rapidly as if they were trying to stop tears falling as my hand reached out to grab his. He eyed me in confusion. I nodded.

"I-I understand… But any time with you will be welcomed," I laced my fingers in his, "greatly."

He swallowed thickly and tried to shake his fingers from mine. I deliberately tightened my grip. Oh I was enjoying this. That's right little idiot, squirm with the awkwardness of it! I wasn't sure how much longer I could keep this up for though, the urge to laugh was getting to great. Oh that's right, you see those uber-girly girls on TV giggling like idiots at everything a guy says…

"Now," Zim continued, taking a seat on the sofa, "as a female infatuated with the greatness of Zim, how would you expect Zim to approach you?"

Oh I hated myself for this… I burst into fits of laughter and sat down next to him, sitting a little too close so that your shoulders brushed against each others. He glared at me in confusion as I shoved him playfully, forcing my laugh into a shrill giggle and rested my head on his shoulder.

"Zim said something amusing?" he asked sceptically.

I giggled again, "No, but you make me laugh anyway, you're so funny… and as for an approach, all you would have to do is talk to me."

Oh I felt disgusting! I was acting like those stereotype air-heads you see on TV! They were vile and demeaning! But hey, if that's what he expected of me, then I would have to swallow my pride even more, no matter how bitter it may be. Hmm, this revenge was getting a little slow, time to kick it up a notch, I wanted him to fully regret ever trying to mess me around! Oh please pride, go down easy!

I leant into his side a little harder so that he lost his balance and landed on his back, his head on the arm of the sofa. A knowing smirk twitched at the corner of my lips and I joined him so that my head rested on his chest, his arm stuck on position around my shoulders. Deliberately, I nuzzled into him and sighed. He froze, not daring to move for fear of the unknown. I ducked so that he didn't see me grinning with the smugness of it.

"D-do human females l-like such close c-contact?" he stammered.

Good, he was feeling awkward, it was working, "Some do, and some don't. I'm more of the former myself. How about you?"

Zim swallowed uncomfortably, "It'll take getting used to… what category would the Gaz -"

I reached a hand up and pressed a finger to his lips, cutting him off, his maroon eyes crossed to get a view of what I was doing. Slowly I pulled my finger away and started tracing his jaw-line. From the way his mouth was quivering slightly, he was clearly very uncomfortable with this. Good. You know that saying, 'You mess with the bull, you get the horns'? Well, my star sign is a Leo, so I changed it. You mess with the lion, you get the claws. Zim asked for it, he's going to bloody get it. I reached my hand up to start twirling his antenna between my fingers.

"Does it matter what Gaz thinks?" I asked, pretending to look disappointed.

"Yes. It does. Remember, this experiment was aimed to improve Zim's strategy of conversing with the Gaz-human." He looked worried, "The Amy-human does remember this, doesn't she?"

I deliberately nuzzled further into him, "I remember, but… I don't know… It's like something's come over me. I'm not so sure I'm happy giving you up to someone else."

Perfect reaction: Zim tensed and eyes magnified, "Th-that's the chemical spray possessing you!"

Before he could register my movements, I rolled over so that he was pinned beneath me; our chests pressed together, "Is Zim sure about that?"

This was brilliant, you could almost hear the panic frying his brain cells. Okay, maybe I was overselling it a little, but if it was teaching him a lesson, so be it. However I was taken by surprise as he swiftly grabbed my wrists and pushed himself over so that we flipped off of the sofa and crashed to the floor. My back slammed against the tiled floor and knocked the air out of me. My head ached as it collided with the floor harshly. Taking advantage of my dizziness, Zim pinned my wrists above my head and clamped my legs together between his. He glowered down at me and pointed at me warningly with his free hand.

"Zim _is_ sure about that." He clarified, "And the sooner this chemical wears off the better, clearly the genius of Zim was too strong this time around..."

Now, really I should have started laughing and told him that I was just messing with him. But there was something in his eyes that scared me, and from the compromising position we were in, I felt it best to keep quiet and let him make the first move. He tilted his head in curiosity and lowered his hand to flick my hair out of my face. His expression softened a little, actually putting me more on edge.

"So Zim could do this to any female, and it would invoke a positive reaction?" he asked.

"No, not to any girl…" I cleared my throat, forgetting my revenge for a moment, "But, to Gaz, yeah, sure."

He exhaled slowly, "And not to you?"

Okay, I didn't see that one coming. I tried to shift away from him but he held me in place firmly. I didn't like where this was going.

"Well, I figured I was just a test-subject. Isn't that what you said?" I asked, trying to switch the focus back to him.

"That _is_ what Zim said, and didn't you say that you weren't happy giving Zim up for someone else?"

I swallowed and pretended to hold back tears, I was still in character after all, "Yes, but knowing that it'll make you happy, that's all I would want for you."

Zim smirked, "That touches Zim greatly, human."

There was an awkward pause where he just stared at me. It was hard to tell what he was thinking, or if he had been serious or mocking me. But there was one thing I was sure of, this little revenge plan had gone on long enough and this was just getting really uncomfortable. Now there had to be a way out of this without giving myself away. I smiled sheepishly up at him and blinked slowly.

"Well, it seems that's you're very practiced with dealing with girls now," I said, trying not to sound too eager to get away, "It looks like Gaz is a lucky girl."

Basic translation: I've had my revenge, you've had your practice, get the hell off of me.

However, Zim smirked wryly, "There is one more thing Zim wishes to perfect before moving on to his chosen mate."

I swallowed, "And what's that?"

Zim started to lower his head, so slowly that it was hard to tell at first if it was real or my imagination. But no, he was definitely moving very close there. Oh crap, what the hell did he think he was doing. His antenna quirked a little as his lips started forming into a small pout. He wasn't! Surely he wouldn't! He was centimetres away, millimetres… Then, just at the last minute, I snapped my head to the side and kicked my legs upwards. His body jerked forward, making his puckered lips smack right into the floor to the right of me. He yelped in pain, distracting him enough to kick again, this time rolling him off of me.

Despite just getting face-planted to the floor and a kick in the stomach, Zim started cackling, hand held over his throbbing bump where his nose would be. I jumped to my feet and backed away, hands held out defensively to create more distance. Why was he laughing at me? Oh… I got it.

"Okay wise-guy how long did it take you to figure out I was pretending?" I snapped.

He sniggered, "Oh you thought you could fool Zim? Zim knew the spray didn't work from the moment you awoke."

I folded my arms, "You weren't there when I woke up."

He deflated, "Fine! From the moment I you admitted to remembering the spray; anyone who was truly affected by it would not have remembered it."

"So instead you just let me carry on making an idiot of myself?" I huffed, reddening, "And that little stunt you pulled back there was just a way to trick me?"

Another series of sniggers, "I figured that there was only so much you would persevere with. And as if Zim would actually…" he gagged.

"Touché, Zimmers, touché." I nodded, "So why did you let me carry on like a moron?"

He smirked, "Zim needed some form of entertainment out of this, and any form of practice _was_ practice... The Amy-worm was most convincing!"

As he started laughing at me again, a familiar burn of vengefulness bubbled inside of me. So he thought that he could trick a trickster, did he? Oh he messed with the wrong girl, again. Fine, let him have this victory. It would be the last one he had today. For a while, I joined in with his laughter. After all, I could see the funny side to it. However, I was quickly forming a plan. As he doubled over from cackling, I strode closer to him and chuckled, entwining his feelers between my fingers. Suddenly, he stopped and arched his brow at me.

"What is the Amy-human doing?" he asked carefully.

I shrugged, still grinning at him, "Nothing…"

"Lies! You're…" he shivered with enjoyment at the touch and involuntarily pressed his head to my palm, "You're…"

"You got me Zim," I sighed, "I was pretending that the spray had worked, but it wasn't to trick you."

He composed himself and swatted my hand away, "The ploy is long over Amy-beast."

"Who says it was a ploy? Maybe I was using it as an excuse, to act on something else…"

He tensed and swallowed thickly, "What are you getting at, human?"

I started tracing my finger from his shoulder to his elbow and back again, "I think you understand what I'm getting at."

Zim made a muffled squeak noise in this throat, "Surely you are toying with Zim!"

I draped an arm over his shoulders and whispered, "I can if you want me too."

He started backing away until his back was pressed against the door. I followed his pace and leant in, placing my hands flat against the door, either side of his head, stopping any escape. I smiled at the irony of it. It wasn't so long ago that we'd been reversed, where he had cornered me in his labs. How revenge is sweet. His eyes quivered at my advances.

"Tell Zim you are joking."

I didn't answer him. In honesty I felt guilty that I'd already messed with his head so much in such a short space of time. But then again, he had messed me about too! And when was I going to get an opportunity to scare him like this again? So, instead of answering him, I simply lent in close so that out faces were inches apart. He tried to push himself further into the woodwork, hand grappling for the handle. I winked at him suggestively and closed the gap between us, moving my head next to his so that our cheeks brushed and if he were human, my lips would be next to his ear.

"Never trick a trickster…" I whispered, giving him a quick peck on the cheek.

His hand finally found the handle of the door and he twisted his harshly. The sudden lack of support sent him falling onto his back and me toppling forward after him. I managed to steady myself before actually falling whereas Zim pushed into a backwards roll to gain distance before jumping to his feet. Now it was my turn to burst into fits of laughter. Revenge: Completed!

"What's going on over there?" a new voice called.

I peeked out and saw Dib standing not far away on my doorstep next door. He hopped over the fence and rushed over to us. Zim actually gave a cry of desperation and sprinted over to meet the boy, cowering behind him and forcing him forward by the shoulders as a shield. Dib arched his brow in confusion as the sudden change in Zim's character and my laughter.

"Dib-filth! Beware your _mate_!" the alien gasped, "That trickster human is not to be trusted!"

"Uh… am I missing something?" Dib asked, hunching his shoulders to shake Zim off.

I breathed and composed myself, "Nah, I'm just helping Zim out with something. After all, he _asked_ for it."

Zim narrowed his eyes at me, "Vile human!"

"Awe, loves you too." I grinned, putting on a sickly sweet voice, "And look on the bright side, it looks like you don't need any more practice, you did very well today!"

He shoved Dib aside and stormed up to me, pointing a warning finger at me. He didn't get too close before I winked and puckered my lips a little before grinning at him. He shuddered with distain for me and pushed past, vanishing into his house. I waved with over-the-top enthusiasm and called out just before he slammed the door.

"Hey Zim, remember, if you need help with anything else, you know who to ask!" I smirked.

Zim poked his head out of his house one last time to glare at me. His mouth gaped open and closed like a fish; trying to find a suitable comeback. Unable to find one, he just went with that he knew.

"YOU LIE!"

Slam went the front door and snap went my sides as I doubled over in laughter. Dib watched me in confusion before I finally collected myself. My cheeks were burning from laughing, but it was worth it.

"Can someone tell me what's going on?" he asked, chuckling a little himself.

I smirked, "Zim just needed help with something, and being the helpful person that I am, was all too willing to help."

He folded his arms with a smirk, "Oh yeah…?"

I nodded, "Just a few tips on handling girls, that's all."

Dib scoffed, "He's got a crush?" he hesitated, "It's… it's not y-you is it?"

"No, but it's someone else pretty close."

He blinked and looked around as if to find the mystery person standing behind him, "Who?"

I face-palmed and shook my head, "Never mind, you'll figure it out soon enough."

We both looked down as my wrist started to beep. I pulled back my sleeve and found that I had a message on my communicator. It was written in simple text, and was from… Zim? It read: _The Gaz-human wouldn't have that retaliation, would she?_ I sniggered and turned around to face Zim's house. From the window, a pair of ruby eyes peeked out at me. Shaking my head, I replied on my communicator. _No, I promise she will in no way react like that._ The eyes ducked as the message went though. They returned to nod at me curtly, and then vanish once again. Dib eyed me curiously. To avoid further questioning, I punched his arm playfully, to which he swiftly returned. While he was distracted with telling me the reason why he'd been calling for me, I turned around to face the house again. A smile crept on my face. Oh Zim, Gaz is going to have her hands full with you… you little idiot…

**A/N:**

**Thanks again to MadHattressX3 for giving me this idea and I hope you like it and thanks for all your reviews! XD**

**Also, this is just to be clear, I am not changing the DaAr, and I'm too much of a fan for ZaGr to give up on that. This was purely for the laughs and awkwardness because it was funny. In my mind, Zim does like Gaz, why else would he put up with so much crap from Amy, because he wants answers! Also, that 'mess with a lion' quote, I made that up because I am a Taurus, so the 'mess with a bull' applies to me in the same way XD Please Review! **


	10. TongueTwisters

**Zim is introduced to the world of confusing and tricky 'tongue-twisters', and we all know that Zim never backs down from a challenge. This fic doesn't give any much detail on time so it can be set whenever the reader wishes it.**

If Ms. Bitters mentioned the word doom one more time – okay, never mind she already did. If I had a penny for every time she said it, I would be able to re-enact the scene from Duck-Tales where Scrooge dives into a sea of money. However, if I tried it, I would break every bone in my body instead of being able to swim in it. So that's not a good idea… but I'd be very rich either way! I felt something tap my foot so I casually glanced down. Dib had used his boot to scoot a note across to me. He was playing a risky game there. Being sat in the front row usually meant that it was harder to get away with note passing and such. I elbowed my pencil off of the desk and reached over to pick it up along with the note. However, I ruined the innocent illusion by accidentally smacking my head under the desk on the way up. I grunted in pain and heard the slap of Dib giving himself a face-palm. There was a murmur of sniggers from the class behind me and my face turned scarlet with embarrassment. Luckily, just at that moment the bell rang, giving the students excuse to leave. Ms. Bitters hissed at me for interrupting the last few seconds of out torture before slithering out of the room. Dib hopped from his chair and bent down to be lever with me.

"Real subtle." He commented.

"Thanks." I smirked sarcastically, but I still wasn't getting up, "Uh, I'm stuck."

He tilted his head, "Stuck?"

I wriggled my head to prove my point, "Yes, stuck. There's gum or something under here and my hair's caught in it."

He placed his hand over his mouth and tried to give the illusion of think of a solution, but the way his eyes brightened and the colour of his cheeks darkening it was clear what he was really doing. I rolled my eyes and swatted his arm.

"It's not funny!" I insisted, laughing myself.

"It's pretty funny from here." He chuckled.

I allowed myself a giggle before gritting my teeth and forcing my head downwards in the hope of pulling my hair out of the sticky mess. I winced, it really hurt and I hated having my hair pulled, but I'd rather pain for a moment then being stuck for longer. After a few inches, the grip was starting to become loose. I reached up with my hands to try and dislodge it more and shuddered at the gooey mess that glued to my fingers.

"This is vile!" I declared.

"You might have to cut your hair out of it."

I narrowed my eyes, "Don't even joke."

"Joke about what human?"

I jumped and the jolt ended up snapping my head upwards again, reattaching the gum back into my hair again. Dib jumped back in alarm and fell on his rear, glaring at the newcomer. Zim was looking at me with great amusement from his position, leaning over my desk to look at me upside down.

"Sticky situation?" he offered.

"Predictable cliché?" I retorted, reaching up to pull his wig off of his head.

He lunged for it and ended up sliding right off of the desk and head first onto the floor. Enjoying the result, I tossed the wig back to him. He replaced his carefully while scowling at me. I resumed my work at re-detaching myself, but thanks to Zim, having to restart again and this time taking a lot longer. Dib tried to give me a hand but I gently eased him away, it wasn't that I didn't want his help, it's just that my hair being pulled by gum is bad enough, but if a person was to pull my hair, then I got really miffed.

"Dib, are you walking home or not? Waiting is irritating me.", Gaz stormed into the room and took in the scene, rolling her eyes at me, "Is this all?"

Before any of us could reply, she pulled out her house keys and bent down to look at the damage. She lined up the jagged edge of the key with the gum and swiftly sliced it. My hair came loose and the gum snapped sickly back to the desk. I ran my fingers through my hair and picked the tiny leftover bits out.

"Thanks." I grinned.

She shrugged, "Whatever."

I looked back at my sticky prison and scoffed, "Someone's had some fun with some chewing gum."

Dib tilted his head and smirked, "Someone's had some fun with some chewing gum. Hey, say that five times really fast!"

I tried and got to the third go and I got a few 'some' in the wrong place and instead of chewing gum ended up 'sewing gum', I chuckled, "Hey I made a tongue-twister."

Zim blinked and peered closely at me, "What on Irk is a 'tongue-twister', you're mouth appendage appears in normal condition."

Dib rolled his eyes, "Not literally, space-boy! A tongue-twister is a phrase that's meant to make you mess up your words."

Zim scoffed, "Pfft, as if a pointless pass-time would work on the almighty Zim!"

I arched my brow, "She sells sea shells down by the sea shore. Say it quickly."

"Zim has no interest in -"

"Say it quickly." Gaz ordered; a look of intrigue in her eyes.

"She sells sea shells down by the sea shore." Zim said with the swiftest of speed, an uneasy look in his eyes and not tripping once, "Was something meant to happen?"

"Okay try this one. Can a clam cram in a clean cream can." Even as I said it, I had to take my time and concentrate.

Dib tried it and got to 'clean' before tripping and ending up with a new word 'cerlam' instead. Gaz attempted it, and achieved it, but she was forced to slow her pace which clearly irritated her. Zim on the other had increased his speed and finished the phrase with ease. He eyed us suspiciously.

"Surely you are toying with Zim, this is not challenging whatsoever."

Dib glared at him, "Six sick hicks nicks six slick bricks with picks and sticks!"

I tried not to laugh, that one took Dib four times to get right and at a very slow pace, one word at a time. Zim folded his arms and smirked at Dib.

"If you are going to challenge Zim then at least perfect it yourself first Dib-worm, it's most embarrassing on your part." He tilted his head, "Would you repeat it again, I don't think I heard correctly."

Gaz smirked a little at that, I bit my lip and looked away while Zim continued his smug stance, mocking Dib to no end.

Dib clenched his fists, "Just say it, lizard."

Zim shrugged and took a breath, "Six sick hicks nicks six slick bricks with picks and sticks!"

"Six sleek swans swam swiftly southwards!" I offered.

"Gobbling gargoyles gobbled gobbling goblins!" Dib snapped.

"Mr. Tongue-Twister tried to teach his tongue how to twist and turn!" I challenged.

"Red lorry, yellow lorry, red lorry, yellow lorry, red lorry, yellow lorry!" Dib babbled.

It went on and on, Dib and I threw every one we could think of at him. We tripped and fumbled over out own words just giving the to him, and he accepted them all. And every time… Perfect. No breaks and no trips, he said every single one of them perfectly. Zim looked at Gaz mockingly and forced a yawn.

"Does the Gaz-human wish to attempt a challenge? Or has Zim already proven himself too much of a superior being through his speech?"

Gaz eyed him curiously for a moment and then raised an eyebrow. Her hand went to her chin in thought and then she smirked. Her arms folded and she dampened her lips with her tongue in preparation for her words. Zim smirked and waited patiently at her doing so. Gaz took a breath and looked at him dead in the fake blue eyes. She said her words slowly and with care, careful not to make the mistakes Dib and I had made before.

"Irish. Wrist. Watch." She stated.

Zim sniggered, "Is that it? I must admit that Zim expected a little more of a challenge from you of all people, little-Gaz."

I allowed myself a smirk. It always made me smile when he called her by that little pet name. Lately, he wasn't even aware he was doing it any more, and it was the cutest thing. But back to the challenge at hand, Zim had openly mocked it, and I had to admit that considering this was Gaz, I was also expecting a longer and more complex phrase to come out. Dib glanced at me and shrugged, also clearly expecting more than three little words. Zim cleared his throat.

"Here goes. Irish wish rosh." He blinked and licked his lips, "I wish rish wash. Irish wriss ratch! I wish rish rash!" he pointed at Gaz accusingly, "What kind of trickery is this!"

I attempted it, but it came out in a slurred jumble. Dib got it more right than me, but still ended up slurred and using a made-up word near the end. Wow, that was a good one… Gaz raised an eyebrow at Zim.

"Is that it?" she smirked, "Does the alien wish to accept defeat? Or have I already proven myself too much of a superior being through my speech?"

Her twist of words were quite effective, making his fists clench in agitation, "Zim shall not be defeated by three insignificant words!"

"Then by all means Zim," Dib smirked and folded his arms, "try again."

Zim glared at him, eyes darting for an escape route, "I wish risk what. Oh for the love of Irk how do you endue this infuriation!" he cursed and kicked his foot out to turn over a chair, "This is not over worm-children, for I shall master the twisting-tongue words and when I do… oh such victory shall there be…"

I swallowed at his threatening glare, "It's just a bit of fun Zim, none of us can say it that well."

"I am Zim!" he declared, "Zim does everything well, in fact Zim achieves everything with perfection!"

Dib rolled his eyes, "Perfection like your security system?"

Zim pointed accusingly, "What are you getting at, human?"

"Just that the intruder alert timer is a bit off, you may want to adjust it to your wrist watch for better effect." He raised his eyebrows at me for a hint.

Hint received, "If you want your watch adjusting I know a nice Irish guy who can fix it."

Zim shook his head, "Zim see's what you're doing and it's not working. You think that by hinting at watches and Irish worm-babies that you can trick Zim once again? Do not flatter yourselves!"

Okay, it had been a long shot, but it was still funny to see him get so annoyed about it. Gaz squinted in confusion at her G.S.2 and held it out towards us.

"Who's been messing with my Game-Slave? This message just popped up." She said darkly, "I can't make it out, the screen has gone static."

As Zim was the closest, he peered at the screen and narrowed his eyes in concentration before he read out the words, "I lish wish wash. Oh curse you and your infernal vocabulary! CURSE YOU!"

He finished his bellowing curse and stormed out of the room and out of sight. Dib and I looked at Gaz's triumphant smirk with confusion. As an answer, she held out the screen to face us. I snorted with laughter while Dib sniggered and nodded at his sister in approval. There, on the screen in large red pixellated letters were three little words. Irish. Wrist. Watch.

It turns out that the reason Gaz chose that particular tongue twister for Zim was in actual fact, because of his tongue. She explained in her blunt way that his snake-like tongue would flow quicker and allow the 's', 'sh', 'g' and 'c' types of twisters to be of no problem. However, the one she chose was all to do with the lips, and even as humans, it forced the tongue to the back of the mouth. So with Zim unable to use his worm-tongue to work around the words, he was left just as tripped up as the rest of us. I had to admit, I was pretty impressed with her thinking. I would never have thought of that and Dib, who claimed he knew that all along, also looked at her with mild admiration. Gaz was quick to ignore our praise and went back to her game, passing it off with her usual 'whatever' attitude.

* * *

The next day however, Zim didn't show up at skool, and when I went to check on him that afternoon, there was no answer. I figured that maybe he was busy and tried to put it to the back of my mind as I headed over to Dib's house. After all, it wasn't the first time Zim vanished. One time he'd disappeared for almost a week and then returned as if nothing had happened. Hmm… I still never found out what happened there… Evil curiosity, shut up!

I mentioned this to Dib that afternoon while watching another re-run of Mysterious Mysteries.

"Maybe he's making a machine that will literally twist everybody's tongues in knots as revenge!" Dib gasped, making a move as if to get up.

"Or… he's sulking like a whiner." Gaz muttered, rolling her eyes.

I poked my tongue out to examine it, "Can you tie a tongue in a knot?"

"Well this is Zim, who knows that that evil space-monster is up to!"

There was a knock at the door. We all looked at each other curiously; hardly anyone called at the Membrane house apart from me and occasionally one of the Professors work-friends to pick something up. Dib peeked through the eye-piece and gave a startled expression. He beckoned me over and opened the door carefully. Zim stood on the front step in his disguise and smirked at the pair of us. He pointed in triumph and grinned menacingly. His tongue ran over his lips and he took a large breath.

"Irish wrist watch!" he declared, "HA! Take that, humans! Zim has mastered your inferior language tricks once and for all!"

Dib stared at Zim in bemusement, "Seriously, you came here just to show that you can say a tongue-twister?"

I rolled my eyes at Dib, "Well done, Zim, really great job."

It came out a little patronising, but how could you not congratulate someone on a word game without sounding it a little?

"Victory for Zim!" he tried, punching the air.

"Hey Zim."

The alien peeked past us to look at Gaz. He arched one eye suspiciously at her while she returned the stare, but hers was more smug and challenging.

"Say it again." she ordered.

"Zim has already proved his superior speech motor skills, Gaz-human."

"Then prove them again." she raised an eyebrow.

"If you wish it, little-Gaz." He cleared his throat, "I lish wash witch. Wait! Irish wish walsh! AGH! Curse you Gaz-worm! CURSE YOU!"

He gave each of as a threatening glare along with an accusing point before sprinting down the sidewalk and out of sight. We turned to look at Gaz in awe, but she'd already returned to her game. She shook her head absentmindedly and wore a more prominent smirk, tweaked at the side of her mouth.

"Whiner." She muttered.

**A/N:**

**Poor Zim, and you were doing so well XD Try and have a go at a few and see of you can do better than the characters! Hope it made you laugh XD**


	11. Asthma Attack

**A/N:**

**It's been mentioned before that Amy has mild asthma, but what happens when she and Dib get caught up in an explosion in Zim's base and it triggers an asthma attack? No real relationship things are signalled to so it can be set whenever the reader wished. **

BOOM!

Smoke flooded the labs, blinding us from view. This was just typical. I told Dib, big red buttons are always a problem. Is it just me that's noticed that? In movies and TV, it's always, 'don't touch the big red button' or 'hit self-destruct, it's the big red button' or 'the big red button started flashing with warning'. Why did it even have to be big and red? That just screamed attention, begging for people to press it. If it was the small grey button, or the dull blue button, no one would really care! Yet, here we were, Dib just had to go and press the big red button. The smoke started to burn in my throat, making me cough and splutter.

"Okay…" Dib muttered, clasping his hands together, "Maybe we should get out of here!"

I nodded in agreement, still unable to speak from the feeling of my throat scolding. He grabbed my arm and started leading me away. But we were deep in the base and we had to sprint as full speed to try and get ahead of the smoke. My heart was pumping and I had to gasp for breath, which considering the smoke was only making things worse. We finally made it up into the elevator of Zim's base and into the living room. For once in his life, Dib had made the right choice in waiting till Zim was out of the house before sneaking in. And wow what a great idea it was… sarcasm is a wonderful thing isn't it? However, the smoke followed us up and I found that it was getting harder to breathe.

Dib tried to get me to start running again as soon as we emerged from the trash can elevator, but I found that I just couldn't. I could feel the smoke snaking in my lungs, pulling my chest tighter and tighter. Panic was starting to swell inside me, taking up all of the room that was left. Because of the panic, I tried to take breath to calm down, but the muscles in my throat were pulling like thread stitches, stopping any air from getting to me. Dib had dragged me into the living room, not noticing my change. Suddenly, my legs gave way and I crumpled to the floor. I gasped and gasped, but it didn't feel like it was going anything.

"Amy?" Dib said cautiously, "Amy are you okay? That smoke, it was some alien gas wasn't it? Some Irken poison or paralyser! Man I've got to get a sample of that! Wonder why it didn't affect me though? You really don't look so good…"

I shook my head, "… Not… alien… gas…" I rasped, my voice barely a whisper, "I…"

He dropped to his knees and placed a hand on my back in an attempt at comfort, not really knowing what to do. I rummaged in my pockets desperately and then in my rucksack. I cursed myself and then looked at Dib pleadingly, pointing at my throat and chest. He tilted his head in confusion. Then I remembered, he didn't know that I was asthmatic.

"Ah… Asth…" I tried, trying to keep calm, but my heart was pounding so hard that it was difficult, "Asthma…"

This was getting scary, I hadn't had an asthma attack in over three years! I didn't even bother taking my inhaler out anymore! But the smoke and the running must have triggered it up again. It wasn't that I couldn't breathe, but it was just really difficult, like running a marathon while breathing through a straw.

For a moment, he just looked at me in confusion. But in what felt like a lifetime, he clicked. His face drained of all colour and his pupils dilated.

"Uh, okay, uh, do you have a pump or… something?" he stammered.

I shook my head, rasping to force the air into my lungs. I knew that the first thing to do when this happens is to keep calm and try and take slow breaths. Well, that's all easier said than done because I doubt that whoever made those rules was having an attack at the time! It was hard to keep calm and I'm not a naturally calm person even on a good day. Just breathe… Inhale, exhale… Damn it Dib you're not helping!

"Okay, uh, so what do we do now? Uh…" he was running his hands through his hair and chewing his lip like it was a piece of gum.

"GET OUT OF MY BASE DIB-WORM!"

The sudden yell made me jump and gasp, only making my chest tighten. Zim burst through the front door and tackled Dib to the ground. GIR threw aside his dog disguise and bounded over to lock me in a hug.

"Hi Amy-Cakes!" he grinned, then backed away, tilting his head, "Awe, you don't look so good!"

Dib managed to get the alien in a head lock, "Can it, Space-boy! We don't have time for this!"

Zim prised his captor away and eyed him suspiciously, clearly not used to such a reaction, "Say that one more time?" He arched an eye at me, "What is wrong with the Amy-human?"

"She's having an asthma attack."

Dib ignored the confused and curious expression and moved back over to me, muttering calming notions to me. I was moved up onto the sofa and leant forward, slowly taking in the air, one particle at a time it seemed. I started to cough, not a good sign. Zim poked my arm cautiously and smirked.

"Pfft, Zim see's nothing attacking her." He suddenly froze and started darting his eyes around the room, "Or are we under attack by some invisible force? GIR prepare security, we must stop this evil before it spreads!"

I rasped, shaking my head. Please, Zim don't make me laugh right now it won't help me. Dib shoved him in irritation.

"It's a medical condition you lizard! She can't breathe!"

Zim noted the thin trail of smoke coming from the trash can and glared at him accusingly, "And who's fault was that?" he rolled his eyes and looked at me in a huff, "If her breathing tubes are unfunctioned then wouldn't outside air be more efficient?"

Dib deflated, "Oh… well, yeah, I guess…"

He hoisted me upwards gently and started leading me out of the front door. The fresh air was cool and welcoming, my air passage relaxed slightly and more air was permitted into my lungs, but it still wasn't enough and soon refused to expand further. My legs gave way and I leant against the wall of the house, tilting my head upwards. Dib crouched next to me and moved his hands to indicate a breathing pattern, in and out, inhale exhale. Zim tilted his head at him.

"Is the Dib also suffering with an attack?" he asked sceptically.

Dib scowled at him, "I'm trying to help her breathe moron."

Zim scoffed, "Clearly the Amy-worm needs all the help she can get."

If I had the energy, I would punch him. But I could just about manage a glare. No, don't worry about them right now, inhale, exhale, nice and slow…

"Do you have an inhaler at home?" Dib asked, peering at my house next door.

Oh god, did I? No, I don't think I did. Well, maybe, but it was long expired. This was my first attack in three years, and the most of my asthma I'd felt in that time was shortness of breath. This was getting scary now, how long had I been like this? If this kept up for much longer I'd have to make them call an ambulance. And why, of all people, was I stuck with Dib and Zim during a crisis like this? I loved them but they were the least likely to keep calm.

"In-hay-lor?" Zim sounded out the word, "What is the meaning of this in-hay-lor?"

"It's a pump with a chemical in it that will cure her." Dib rambled before suddenly taking my hand, "You're okay, you're fine…" he breathed.

GIR started chuckling, "I help!" he offered.

Dib shoved him away, "Not now…"

"GIR, get in the house before anyone see's you!" Zim snapped, noticing the robot out of his disguise.

GIR stomped his foot, "But I help, see!"

Before Dib knew what was happening, the android jumped up and grabbed him by the spike in his hair, dragging him backwards onto the floor. GIR inhaled deeply and then held it, clenching his eyes shut in concentration. All of a sudden, the little sphere at the top of his antenna lit up. I blinked in shock as he started towards me and forced his metal lips to mine and prised them open. I tried to shake him off but I only ended up pressing further into the wall and feeling a little weaker. GIR suddenly blew forcefully into my mouth, catching at the back of my throat. He pulled away and clamped his hands over my mouth and nose to stop me breathing outwards. For a moment, I was shaking in panic. But then something felt… different. His breath had a strange cooling sensation to it, like something was added to it. Where it was trapped in my system from GIR stopping me breathing, I could feel it swirling in my throat and into my lungs. The robot released me and waited with an expectant grin.

I could feel my throat muscles relaxing and my chest loosening. I drank in the air, savouring every part of it. Finally, it felt like my breathing had gotten back to normal and the strength in my legs was starting to return. Until I was sure that it had passed, I stayed put. Dib arched his brow in confusion, looking at Zim.

"He can turn into a asthma inhaler?" he asked sceptically, but with a hint of awe in his eyes.

Zim tried to cover up his own surprise, clearly unaware of this fact too and smirked, "Of course! Like Zim said, he's not stupid, he's advanced!"

GIR started hopping on the spot, "Amy-Cakes make me cakes now?"

Dib rolled his eyes, "Yeah… _real_ advanced…"

I smiled, allowing myself a soft laugh, "Sure GIR," I said, still taking deep breaths, "you can have all the cakes you want…"

He grinned, his tongue poking over his lips. Wow, that was some kiss of life, I'll give him that… Dib dropped back to my side and started examining me, wide eyed and shaking. Wait, why was he shaking?

"You okay? You don't need an ambulance or another…" he glanced at GIR, "…robo-chemical-blast?"

I chuckled, "No, it's all good, I'm fine…" god it felt great to breathe!

Zim tilted his head, "This _asthma_, is it contagious?"

I smirked, "No, you're safe." I blushed a little at my company, feeling a little embarrassed about the big fuss, "Thanks… all of you…"

Dib flushed and tried to cover it up by pulling me to my feet, "Come on then."

"Where are we going?"

"The pharmacy, get you an inhaler."

Zim rolled his eyes, "Bring forth all the breathing devices and scatter them throughout the planet; _she_ most likely will need them all! Troublesome human female!"

"I would argue with that but… you two know my luck by now." I smirked.

"What luck?" Zim retorted.

"Zim, she's not even arguing with you." Dib shrugged in annoyance.

"Do not question Zim!"

"I didn't ask a question!"

"Victory!"

"That makes no sense!"

And they were off. I couldn't help but smile. GIR was watching them with a grin on his face, he pointed his thumb at them and looked up at me.

"Awe they so cute!"

"If you say so." I sighed and placed a hand on my chest, testing out the breathing tension and felt a rush of relief at the normality of it, "Fancy coming to the pharmacy with me?"

He gasped and nodded, rushing inside and returning in his disguise, "What's about Masta and Mary-Dib?"

The two had not advanced to rolling along the front yard, throwing punches and kicking out at one another harshly. I bent down and picked up the leash around the robots neck and shrugged.

"They'll still be there when we get back."

**A/N:**

**Yes, yes they will XD**

**To all people who suffer with asthma, don't panic and when in doubt, have a robot kiss you XD There are other, and more effective ways to stop an attack without an inhaler/robot and if anyone has any questions, just ask XD I'm not pretending to be a doctor, but I've had experience with asthma and it's kind of overlooked nowadays XD **

**Hope you like this and please review XD**


	12. 4th of July

**A/N:**

**Amy, being British, has never had the chance to celebrate the 4th of July, so Dib offers to take her to the Fair in the park, however, things go from normal to hilarious as Zima nd GIR end up coming along too. Set after Paranormal Meltdown, so Amy and Dib are not dating as of yet!**

For the past week or so, the entire town had slowly become buried under a mass of red, white and blue, not to mention that the entire park had been closed off. I didn't know what was going on but people seemed to be getting really excited and I felt a bit embarrassed asking. Well, almost everyone was getting excited. Dib just rolled his eyes at the passers bye who were whispering furiously and pointing at the balloons and streamers hanging from streetlamps. #

"Are they blind?" he asked, "How can they celebrate this holiday when it's not gonna count for anything if Zim gets his way?"

"Uh…. Okay." I muttered, not seeing the relevance.

He blinked at me, "Okay? Don't tell me you've been caught up in all this?"

"I can honestly say that I haven't."

He arched his brow at my unease, "You do know what tomorrow is, right? 4th of July?"

Then I clicked, "Oh right! Yeah that's a big thing over here, isn't it?" I blushed, feeling like I'd offended him, "Sorry, we don't celebrate that where I come from."

"So, you've never been to an Independence Day fair or anything?"

"No, sorry, I've never had the chance." I shook my head, then I looked at him questioningly, "Wait, what does Zim have to do with it?"

Dib looked at me like it was obvious, "Think about it, if Zim gets his way, then we won't have an _independence _to celebrate! And these people are too dumb to realise it! Like last year! Last 4th of July he tried to send subliminal messages through the fireworks!"

I sniggered, "And how did that turn out?"

Dib adjusted his glasses with a smug expression, "I stopped him. A little water on the fuses and that solved it, and some even splashed on him which was a double victory." He deflated, "Well, it _was_ a victory until I got blamed for running the celebration and got thrown out…"

"Better luck next time." I rolled my eyes.

I wasn't making fun of him, I just recognized that there was no point in going after Zim considering the situation. Zim had left his Tallest long ago, so there was no real point in Dib hunting him. But still, it was Dib's ambition to stop Zim and who was I to crush it? In truth, I kind of wanted to go to the celebration. In the U.K, we didn't have an Independence Day, and I was curious to know what happened during these celebrations. And I think it's become pretty clear how much my curiosity can be a cruel mistress.

"So, theoretically speaking… If we _did_ go to the fair, what would we do?" I asked innocently.

He shrugged, "There's loads of food, fireworks, parades, they set up a funfair in the park and there's a few stalls for games and stuff like that…" he looked at me closely, "You want to go, don't you?"

I looked at the ground, "I'm not saying I do and I'm not saying I don't, but…"

"You're a terrible liar." He smirked, "Look, you've never been before and, well, it's kind of hard living in America and _not_ be sucked into 4th July so… If you wanna go I guess I'll go with you."

I beamed, "You mean it?"

He shrugged, "Sure, may as well enjoy all the Independence we can get before Zim comes up with his next plan…"

* * *

The next night, the entire town was alive with cheers, music and laughing. Light from the park could be seen from my bedroom window. I could make out the curve of a rollercoaster and the colourful roofs of game stalls and the smell of barbecue was mouth watering. It looked like so much fun and I couldn't wait! My mum and sister had already left because it turns out that Evie and her Scout group were in the parade so I would see them there. I was due to meet Dib and Gaz outside the park in twenty minutes so I figured it was best to get moving. However, as I stepped out in the evening air, there was a series of flashing lights coming from my neighbours house. After an almighty frazzle of sparks, the front door burst open and a small green and fuzzy figure was sent shooting out onto the ground.

"GIR!" I shouted, rushing over to him, "Are you okay?"

He jumped up and pulled his hood down, "That was FUN!" he cried, "Your turn Amy-Cakes!"

I really didn't want a turn… However, I was already being pulled inside. Zim was covered in soot and crouching behind the TV. GIR shut the door behind him and shook his master's arm. The alien scowled at him and then jumped slightly at noticing me standing there.

"And what does Zim owe the intrusion?" he said with greatest of sarcasm.

"Great to see you too." I scoffed, "I was heading to the Fair when I noticed your own little celebrations. You do know that fireworks work better _outside_ right?"

"Do not question me! And Zim has no interest in this Fair-thing!" he deflated, "I was fixing the TV…"

"Scary-Monkey went POP! And then he was gone." GIR nodded.

"Fair enough…" I shrugged, "Well, are you sure you don't want to come to the Fair? It's my first time going and it'd be fun if all of us went. Plus by the sound of it, you didn't really get to have a good time last year."

He pointed at me warningly, "Does the Amy-worm know what happens there? They have mechanisms that defy the laws of speed, threatening to blow the skin right off into oblivion!"

"Rides." I translated.

"There are bursts of fire that threaten to reign down and destroy the very ones that created them!"

"Fireworks."

"They cook meats!" he cried in outrage, "_Meats!_"

"Barbecue…" I tilted my head in confusion, "What's wrong with that?"

GIR giggled, "Masta and meats don't like each other. They make Masta head squishy like a taco!"

"Then you don't have to eat anything, come on it'll be fun."

He scoffed and returned to his work, ignoring me. GIR looked at me hopefully and started attaching a leash around his neck and handing the other end to me. I nodded at him and he started hoping from one foot to the other in excitement. Zim rolled his eyes and looked scornfully at his minion. I sighed pretended to sound really disappointed.

"Okay Zim, you don't have to go. After all, you can't help it if you're scared." At that, he flinched and turned to face me, I shrugged, "I just figured, you know, a brave invader like yourself would jump at the chance to face his fears and join us. But, if you're that scared, I'm not going to force you."

"Now see here, human, Zim fears nothing and will prove as such!" he cried, "Zim commands that you lead the way! Oh you shall see, Zim fears nothing!"

Victory for Amy! The trickster strikes again!

GIR tugged on my arm, "Is Gazzie coming too?" when I nodded, he grinned at his mater, "Hear that Masta? Little-Gazzie coming too!"

Zim flushed in anger, embarrassment or possible both and forcefully adjusted his lenses, "Zim has already given consent to attend pitiful human holiday… DO NOT PUSH YOUR LUCK!"

* * *

Needless to say, Dib was less than impressed at the sight of Zim and GIR joining me. He'd protested and it wasn't long before the two had started a brawl right in front of the park. I'd tried to separate them, but the more I did the more it seemed more likely that they would take a swing at me by accident. Gaz huffed, clearly growing bored with this and snatching the handle of the leash from my hand and swiftly looping it over Zim's ankle. She picked up a stick and dangled it tauntingly in front of GIR's face, making him blink in awe behind his disguise.

"Fetch." She said casually, giving it a powerful toss towards the park.

Instantly, GIR went speeding after it, resulting in his master being dragged kicking and screaming behind him. Gaz gave a nod of self pride at her work while Dib doubled over in laughter and I couldn't help but giggle at the sight of it. Okay, I was in hysterics; that was just the funniest thing I'd seen in ages! When we both finally recovered, we sent about searching for him. We did finally, in the middle of the Fair, looking incredible dazed while GIR chewed his stick gleefully.

"So, what's first?" I asked, taking in the excited atmosphere.

"We throw another stick?" Dib offered.

"When I figure out where the upwards direction is, Dib-worm, oh such pain you shall endure!"

"Oooohhhhh!" GIR breathed in awe, "Let's do that! Let's do that!"

The robo-dog was pointing up at a large fixture which was rattling and screeching with metal against metal. We looked upwards and saw a carriage being pulled up a large mound before plummeting downwards along a track and carrying out loop-the-loops and more sudden drops. My heart started pounding just at the sight of the colossal rollercoaster. Trust GIR to pick the biggest looking one in the place. Zim shuddered at the sight.

"And so it begins…"

Dib gulped, "Uh, yeah I can't go on that! My uh…. My glasses would fall off and uh… I don't have a spare pair and… Well have fun!"

I grabbed his arm before he could make a run for it and scowled at him, "You're not scared are you? Mr. Protector-of-the-World!"

"Ha! Tremble in fear Dib-filth! Victory for Zim!"

"Great, so you'll go on it?" I challenged.

He paled, "Don't be absurd human! You mean to say that this contraption does not unnerve you?"

I took another look at the ride and swallowed, "Well, it's big and… fast looking, but its all part of the fun right?"

"Here. Whiners."

Gaz appeared with a roll of tape from an arts and crafts stall and tore off two small strips. She harshly snapped Dib's head downwards and stuck the part of the glasses behind his ears firmly in place with the tape. He ducked out of her grasp and tried to remove his glasses, but they were stuck tight.

"There. Now get in line." She ordered.

"Do not order -"

She cut Zim off by giving one of her stern glares. GIR giggled in excitement and pulled us towards the line. The last rollercoaster I'd been on was back in my old home, but that was nothing compared to this monster! The closer we got to the front, the more I was starting to shake with both anxiousness and excitement. Gaz remained in her calm manner while Dib was starting to wring his hands nervously. Zim was examining the coaster with his eyes, his blue lenses quivering at the sight. Finally, it was our turn. We all managed to fit in to one row, GIR at the far end, then Gaz, Zim, me and Dib. The barriers came down and fixed firmly over us, locking us in place. I gasped at the carriage shit forwards and started to slowly climb up the incline, taunting us with the lack of speed.

"You shall pay for this Amy-worm!" Zim snapped, "You've doomed us all!"

I sniggered, "We'll be fine! Just picture it like your cruiser."

Dib started, "Don't say that! We will be doomed!"

"Zim is an excellent in a cruiser!" he retorted.

"Yeah, like a crash-dummy!"

"Dib, you're crushing my hand." I muttered.

"Sorry!" he blushed.

"Zim," Gaz said darkly, "If you don't remove your nails from my leg I _will_ throw you out of this carriage."

"HERE WE GO!" GIR cried, bouncing in his seat.

The pit of my stomach lurched as we reached the top of the trail and plummeted downwards at a sheer drop. My hair whipped backwards and the wind was like ice cutting against my skin. To my right, my ear was ringing as Zim was crying out if terror while my left hear was going numb with a high pitched squeak that Dib was making. His lips were pressed into a thin line where he refused to scream, so instead it was contained in his throat. I couldn't see Gaz, or hear her for that matter, but GIR was screaming at top volume with hints of hysterical laughter. My hands dung into the support at the G-force pinned me in place. I presumed I was crying out too, there was definitely another person screaming but the air was throwing it away too quickly for me to tell. My throat hurting seemed like a big enough clue. My eyes clenched shut as we were spun upside down and downwards into another drop. After another series of sharp turns and another loop-the-loop, the ride came to a sudden stop.

For a moment, we were all frozen in shock. I could feel my hair sticking upwards like I'd been plugged into an electric socket. I looked at Dib, who seemed unable to move and his eyes looked ready to pop out of his head.

"Dib?" my voice was raspy from the yelling, "Are you okay?"

He glanced at me and mouthed a very painful looking, "OW!"

I looked down and found that my hand had gripped his in panic and my nails were digging harshly into his skin. I pulled away with an apology and bit my lip nervously at the little crescent marks that I'd imprinted him with. We looked over at Gaz who was looking extremely irritated, her hair also sticking up from the wind. But she was more agitated at the alien who had clamed his arms around her neck and was quivering from the aftershock. He suddenly noticed his actions and shoved himself away as GIR giggled hyperactively.

"Again! Again!"

"NEVER again!" Zim snapped.

Dib grunted as we clambered back onto the ground, struggling with his glasses, "What kind of tape was that? I can't get them off!"

Zim smirked, "Here, Dib-worm, allow me to help."

Before Dib could protest, Zim reached up and gripped the frame of the glasses and harshly snatched them downwards. There was a sickening ripping sound as the tape tore away from Dib's skin, He cried out in pain and gripped the side of his head in agony. Zim let out a triumphant chuckle and scanned the area, examining the other rides. I looked around too and sought out a ride that consisted of standing in a circular room and being spun around so that the G-force pinned you to the wall. After that, we skimmed around a few slower rides like that Ferris wheel and a few stalls. Dib and Zim started a full out war on the target practice game. With Zim's military training and Dib's previous experience with Zim, they were both pretty evenly matched. In the end, the stall manager actually gave them both full refunds just to get them to leave.

We stopped off to watch the parade, with GIR viewing from atop Dib's head. For a minute or two, my mum came and found us, pointing out my sister in her Scouts uniform marching proudly with the rest of her troop. She beamed and waved back when she saw us. It was getting pretty dark by this point and the entire park was in a dim glow of carnival lights and candles. We stopped off at a food stand when my mom left and feasted on hotdogs and burgers galore. Zim kept at a safe distance during this part.

"What happens when he eats meat?" I muttered to Dib.

"No idea, but look what happens when it touches him!"

Dib picked a chunk of his burger and flicked it with expert precision towards the alien. All it did was bounce off of his cheek, but his pupils instantly dilated in panic and he started yelling as the meat started to fuse with his skin, turning it a sickly brown colour. It didn't last long as it was only a small chunk with minimal contact and the colour faded quickly, but it still didn't stop the itching panic. Dib snorted with laughter while my jaw had dropped. I scowled at Dib who shrugged and carried on eating. Gaz rolled her eyes and tossed something from the table towards Zim, who caught it and looked at it cautiously.

"It's a veggie-burger, whiner." She snapped.

"Hey, come with me, you'll love this!" Dib grinned at me, pulling my arm and dragging me through the crowds.

I was faintly aware of Zim, Gaz and GIR following, but they didn't seem to bothered about keeping up. Dib led me to the far edge of the park where there was a slight mound. At the top, there was a guy handing out pale circular objects and holding a flamed stick. Dib paid for one and started to unfold it carefully. He lit a fuse inside the cavity and the entire thing started to inflate. It was a lantern. I beamed, I always wanted to try one of these. He held it out to me and told me where to put my fingers so that I didn't burn. My hands accidently came to rest on his, making him blush, but he didn't move. On the count of three, we lifted it upwards and watched as it floated off into the distance. I noticed that our hands still hadn't left each others, but I didn't mind, I was kind of enjoying it. The peaceful silence was broken however.

"Those kill the atmosphere, you know." Gaz stated simply, folding her arms.

"Not to mention play havoc with radars!" Zim added, "I've seen those before, getting sucked into turbines and causing avoidable panic when getting mistaken for smaller ships!"

I chuckled, "Then maybe you need better equipment?"

He scowled at me warningly, to which I flashed a wink just to wind him up further. We watched a little longer as other people started raising their own lanterns, lighting the sky like fireflies. We all were suddenly jolted from the quiet as an announcer of a megaphone announced the start of the fireworks in five minutes.

"Can we stay here?" I asked, "We've got a pretty good view from up here."

"Okay, oh uh…" he glanced down and snatched his hand away, "Sorry…"

Zim scoffed and rolled his eyes, turning away to look at the view. GIR was shifted excitably and running around us, clapping his hands together from the anticipation. I removed my jacket and lay it on the grass to sit down, Dib following suit. Gaz took no care for the ground and threw herself down, pulling out her G.S.2 and not looking that interested in the upcoming event. Zim casually sat down too, tapping his fingertips together.

"Fireworks aren't going to hurt you, Zim." I smiled.

"Zim does not fear the works of this fire!" he insisted, "Zim simply grows bored with the – AGH!"

He jumped to his feet as he cried on panic as the first rocket smashed into the sky. Dib snorted with laughter and clutched his sides.

"That's right Space-boy, no fear at all!"

"You dare to mock Zim?"

"You have to ask?"

"Why you -!"

Zim lunged. I ducked just at the last minute and Dib went flying backwards as the alien smacked into him, sending them both sprawling along the grass. GIR came to sit on my lap and pointed up at the crackling lights like a child, gasping and giggling as a rainbow of sparks showed down. Gaz rolled her eyes at the scrapping pair and moved over to sit further away from them.

"So," she said, not looking up from her game, "How was you're first 4th July?"

I grinned, "It was amazing!"

She shrugged, "Wait till you have Thanksgiving."

* * *

The boys had given in their fighting just to catch the last two minutes of the firework display, and I had to say it was one of the most spectacular displays I've ever seen. I've got to hand it to you Americans; you know how to throw a good party! Once it was over, it had gotten pretty dark and it was nearly my curfew. Gaz chose to walk straight home while Dib offered to walk me back. That also meant that Zim and GIR would be joining us too, but I didn't mind, even if he did. On the way, a light drizzle started to fall over us. Zim started to sizzle, his skin burning and giving off a horrible smell so I quickly threw my jacket over his head.

"Zim does not need your assistance, human!"

"I'll take it back then, shall I?" I challenged, raising my eyebrow knowingly.

He deflated and huddled further under the clothing, "Well there's no call for that…"

"Wimp." Dib scoffed, reaching into the many hidden pockets of his coat and pulling out an umbrella, holding it over the pair of us.

I smiled gratefully, but then took a bold step forward as the rain became heavier. After they day I'd had, nothing could ruin my mood and I just felt great. My first real 4th of July celebration! I span around on the sidewalk and let the rain sink into my clothes and drip into my hair. Both Dib and Zim tilted their heads in confusion at me, but I didn't care. I giggled at GIR shrieked in glee and joined in with me. It was rare that I could have that much fun in one day and it _not_ end in a fight between the pair or an explosion. By the time we reached my house, my clothes were soaked right through and I was shivering slightly.

"Well what did you expect?" Dib asked with a playful grin, "This isn't a musical you know?"

"But how fun would that be?" I smirked.

"How can you stand to frolic in such disgusting conditions?" Zim snapped, "It's disgusting!"

I pretended to look offended and held out my arms, "Awe, I think I'll need a hug to get over that one, Zimmers!"

He backed away at my soaked form and cowered further under the jacket, "You shall keep away!"

GIR chuckled, "Can I gets a hug instead?"

"No GIR!" Zim cried, sprinting off into his house as his minion chased him, "No GIR! No!"

Dib and I sniggered as he walked me to my door, "You're gonna get sick, you know." He pointed out.

"Maybe, but I've had too good a day to care. Thank you."

He shrugged, "It's uh… no problem…" he looked at his watch and shifted, "Well uh, happy 4th July!"

I smiled and nodded, backing into my house, "Happy 4th July."

* * *

Agh my head hurts and I can't breathe through my nose! My can't I speak? Damn you rain! Damn you to hell where you may evaporate before you can hit the ground! And what was that shouting outside? I begrudgingly pushed myself up and looked out of my bedroom window. My head felt to heavy! I opened the window and peered out to see Zim out in his front yard holding a remote that was directing his gnomes to close in on Dib.

"Will you two shut up for one day!" I cried, my throat aching and my voice nasally from my blocked nose.

They both paused and looked up at me. Dib's eyes widened in shock, Man! You look awful!"

"Cuz that's what _all_ earth-mates want to hear, Dib-filth…" Zim said sarcastically.

Dib flushed at me, "No I didn't mean, well, it's just…" he swallowed and tried to compose himself, "Are you okay?"

"I'm great…"

Dib folded his arms knowingly, "You're sick, aren't you?"

I coughed and tried to stop my eyes watering, "I'm not sick I'm just…"

"Sick." Zim finished with amusement, "What did you expect from such an inferior human immune-system?"

"Like you're is any stronger!" Dib retorted, "Who lands on a planet with over 70% of the surface covered in water, when they're allergic to water?"

"What human would constantly keep looking for punishment at a superior beings base, when they clearly are no match?"

"What alien thinks he can win when I'm around?"

"What -"

I slammed the window shut and closed the curtains, burying my head under the pillows. I wasn't in the mood to listen to them today, I felt too much like I'd been hit by that rollercoaster. This illness was still worth it though. I couldn't wait until next 4th of July, only next time… I'd stay out of the rain. Hey, that's a thought… I opened my window one more time to find that they were still arguing.

"Zim! Where's my jacket!"

**A/N:**

**Sorry this was a few days late, but I thought I'd look into 4****th**** July before writing about it, I hope I did it justice, I really want to attend a real one of these some day in the U.S. And this last part of dancing in the rain happened to me yesterday, so I figured it would make a funny ending XD Next one-shot shall be all ZaGr based as recommended by 'PuddingNinja', power to the ZaGr! XD **


	13. Prisoners of ZaGr

**A/N:**

**Dedicated to PuddingNinja who wanted a ZaGr based fic, maybe there'll be more of these, you never know XD**

**Zim comes up with a 'brilliant' plan to trap Amy, Dib and Gaz inside his lab so that he can complete another of his genius plans. However, things take a turn when he ends up trapped himself with Gaz. While Dib and Amy are forced to try and free them. Zim and Gaz are stuck and are forced to exchange a few words. Where is this going exactly? Set sometime after the Smurfs crossover which shall be finished soon I promise XD**

You know what, the amount of times that I'd roamed down these corridors in Zim's base; I could sketch a scale map in no time. Dib was sure that this time the alien was plotting something to do with using the 'awesome' power of cheese to enslave the minds of humans. I kid you not, cheese. Frankly, I didn't even _want_ to know how he came across this theory, but it would be amusing to watch anyway. This time even Gaz came along to join us. However, she claimed it was only to save time on dragging us out later on, but I figured there were other reasons. Is there any need to go into it? It had been clear that I was a fan of the idea of Gaz and that insane little E.T getting together. Heck, even Zim had asked me for girl advice! But, we kind of know how successful those times were… Not… But lately I'd learned to ease up on them, no matter how annoying it was. They were both just so stubborn, and that was coming from me! But I digress; we were now heading towards a large containment unit of some kind. Well this was new. Cheese related perhaps? Okay, that's something I never thought I'd say. Only in America folks! Dib went to take a step inside but I hastily pulled him back.

"You don't know what it does yet!"

He smiled sheepishly, "Oh, right…"

"Like it's going to work anyway." Gaz muttered, ignoring my caution and marching right inside.

Everything happened so quickly. The minute Gaz stepped inside, something snatched at her arm and hoisted her in and out if sight. Just as the door sealed shut, something silver leapt out and tackled me to the floor. Dib started smacking his fists against the door, trying to free his sister. But there was no way of seeing inside. I was momentarily blinded by the cyan lights gleaming against my face.

"Hi Amy-Cakes!" GIR grinned, waving despite the closeness, "Hey Mary!"

"GIR, open that door now please." I demanded, pushing him off me.

He shook his head, "Masta told me not to."

"Since when do you listen to Zim?" Dib snapped, now trying to prise the door back with his fingernails.

GIR hunched his shoulders, "He was _real_ serious this time."

All of a sudden a screen slid forward from the wall and crackled into view. We had a view of a large metallic room that seemed to have no exit whatsoever. In the centre, a green face with glowing ruby eyes and a wry grin appeared. Zim, naturally, he just had to go for the big dramatics didn't he? Behind him, Gaz was glaring in rage. That must be the inside of the containment unit, but what was going on?

Zim burst into a fit of maniacal laughter, "Hello, worm-babies! Tell me, how does it feel to be trapped once again by the genius of Zim?" he asked, clearly not able to see us as we could see him.

Dib tilted his head, "Trapped? What trap?"

"Insolent Dib-filth, how much I overestimate you. You really don't even know when you're in peril? Right now you are both standing in the most indestructible of containment units; surely you noticed GIR pulling your sister unit inside, naturally you should follow and thus trap yourselves! And you didn't even see Zim's most perfect of hiding places!"

Dib and I exchanged glances of confusion, I cleared my throat, "Uh, Zim, we're outside. It's you two who are inside the container…"

Zim's feelers drooped a little, "What…"

"You hid inside your own trap?" Dib scoffed, "Who does that?"

Zim pointed at the air warningly, "But you did not see Zim, so Zim wins that round!"

I face-palmed, "Zim… get out here."

There was a moment where the little moron vanished from sight, Gaz just staring at him with a mixture of agitation and amusement. Seriously though, how does he even manage stuff like this? How did it make sense to hide inside his trap, then lock himself inside? Okay, his original idea to pull Gaz in so that we'd rush to help her; that was smart. Creating an indestructible container to imprison us; that was smart. Using GIR was debatably smart. But everything else was just insanely stupid! I could see Dib turning a rosy colour where he was trying to stifle his laughter. Admittedly, I was trying not to laugh too, mainly for the reason that Gaz would kill us if he did. Zim returned to the monitor looking deflated and irritable.

"You're stuck, aren't you?" Dib asked, arching an eyebrow mockingly.

"It wouldn't be a very successful trap if the prisoners could get out, would it Dib-stink?" Zim snapped.

I hid a smirk and started examining the exterior, "Is there anyway we can get you out?"

Dib looked at me in alarm, "What? Why? We've got him where we want him! He's totally at our mercy!"

I tapped the screen sceptically, "And so is your sister."

"Oh…"

Zim delivered a smug expression and raised his fist in the air, "Take that human! Now you _have_ to assist Zim!"

"As soon as you get out of there, you are so dead Space-boy!"

Zim started handing out orders to us, nothing new there then. Apparently because this containment unit was so advanced; Zim's words not mine; we had to hack into the main computer and program the doors to open. That didn't seem so hard, Dib had already broken into the house system loads of times before. But that was in another part of the base. I was about to follow Dib when he stopped me in my tracks.

"Actually, could you, you know…" he swallowed thickly as if it was painful, "Keep an eye on _them_. I don't trust Zim, if he does anything to hurt my sister I want to know about it!"

I nodded, "I doubt he'd do anything to harm her, drama-queen."

"No Gaz-human! Zim apologises! Mercy!"

We span around to the screen in time to see Gaz grabbing Zim by the throat and pining him against the wall. He gasped for breath as her amber eyes narrowed in anger for putting her in this situation. I eyed Dib knowingly.

"Vice-versa however."

He shrugged, "What can I say? I've taught her well."

"Sure you did…" I smirked.

He vanished into the elevator that toon him downwards into the main levels of the base. I clamped my teeth down on my lip as GIR started waving from his hiding spot clinging to the back of Dib's head. Looks like Dib was going to have a little helper if he liked it or not. I returned my gaze to the screen, suddenly aware that even though I could see and hear Zim and Gaz, they could only hear me but thought that I'd gone with Dib. So really, they thought they were alone. Interesting…

Gaz finally decided that she'd inflicted enough discomfort on the alien and released him, allowing him to fall to the ground and gasp greedily for air. She glared at him before storming to the other side of the prison and pulled out her G.S.2, taking seat on the floor and doing her very best to drown out all sight and sound of the situation. Zim watched her cautiously, a strange glint in his eyes that gave the impression that he was unsure of what to do with himself. For a while, they just stayed like that. Zim too took a seat and absentmindedly twiddled his thumbs together. Now if it had been anyone else in there with him, he would have blamed them to no end, but considering how Gaz had made her silent threat very clear, he didn't dare say a word. Oh come on Zim, speak! Agh, this was worse than those crappy soap operas on TV! But after a few minutes of silence, Gaz suddenly snapped her game closed and tossed it across the room, making it bounce harshly off of Zim's head.

"What was the meaning of that!" he demanded.

"The batteries died." She said simply.

"And that is Zm's fault?"

"Everything else is."

He pointed warningly, "I'll have you know that if it wasn't for GIR locking the door so quickly, that this plan would be perfect! So you can hardly blame Zim for this, let alone your gaming device, Dib-sister!"

She arched her brow, "Don't call me that."

He tilted his head, "You are the Dib's sister, so why shouldn't you be called as such?"

She folded her arms and fixed a scowl, "I don't need to be reminded of it every time you talk. And it's not like that's the only way of defining me either. Dib is my brother, unfortunately, but it's not my label."

Zim contemplated her words, "I suppose that the name is a tad insulting to you, considering you have not necessarily done anything insult-worthy…" he shrugged, "You bring a valid point Little-Gaz."

At that name, she glanced up and then rolled her eyes nonchalantly. There was that little nickname again. Zim tensed as if he was about to prepare for an incoming attack, but none came. Instead, he got to his feet and walked over so that he was towering in front of his cell-mate. She looked up expectantly and didn't bother getting to her feet. The alien arched an eye curiously.

"You do not protest to that?"

She shrugged, "Gaz is my name, isn't it? _Little_ isn't exactly insulting, and neither is _human_; so Little-Gaz or Gaz-human, it makes no difference to me."

"So, if your name is present, you are passive to what Zim calls you?"

Her expression turned to irritation, "My name is my name; but if we're getting technical I'd rather you not call me at all."

He blinked and his antenna flattened against his head like he was disappointed; it took a moment for him to regain composure and he folded his arms expectantly, "Does the Gaz-human have a name for Zim?"

"Zim. What did you expect?" he didn't answer and she clenched her fists in annoyance as he continued to loom over her and thumbed to her side, "Sit or go away."

For a moment, he wasn't sure if it was some trick, but he must have figured that there was nothing she could possibly pull while locked inside the unit. So he gingerly slid down the wall so that he was next to her. She shifted away slightly to create a fraction more distance between them. He swallowed, fearing that she was going to try and strangle him again, but relaxed a little when she leant back against the wall again. His antenna kept quirking and seemed to tilt her way slightly, but she either didn't notice or didn't care to bring it up. Finally, after an awkward silence, she turned her head to look at him sceptically.

"You're an idiot."

"Why do you insult Zim? Zim has done nothing!"

She pointed upwards to signify the circumstances they were in and sighed, "Your voice is irritating me."

"You irritate Zim!" he paused and tapped his chin in thought, "Why does Zim get the felling that we have said that before?"

"Because we have. Remember when you all summoned that ghost, BJ? I blamed you for Dib missing family night and then we had that same insult exchange and then…"

They exchanged unsure glances before turning back to examine the tiled floor. The memory passed behind their eyes. I knew exactly what memory. When the two had argued on that day, they had been awfully close to one another, a fist about to swing. But at the last minute, BJ turned into a pillow which I threw and hit Zim in the back of the head. The force had made him stumble forward and go to cry out in angered surprise, but instead, he stumbled forward enough for his mouth to land perfectly on her lips. That had been a good shot; although I had paid dearly for it after… They finished reminiscing, in disgust or consideration, it was hard to tell. But they were neither scowling or smiling so that seemed a good sign for them.

Zim cleared his throat, "That Amy-worm is troublesome, yes? Not in the same league as the Dib-stink, but troublesome all the same."

She gave a hint of a wry smile, "It's the way she works. Like they way you work is moronic."

He pointed at her warningly, "The way you work is…" he trailed off, not knowing the right word, he was starting to stammer before he decided on: "…Gaz-ish!"

"Yeah, it is." A smirk, that made him widen his eyes in surprise, she gave him a side-ways glance, "What?"

The alien snapped his eyes downwards, "There is no what." He insisted, getting to his feet and taking a few steps ahead so that his back was facing her, "Zim was wondering why the Gaz-human does not smile like the others. The Amy-beast is always amused, smeet-like almost; the Dib smiles with her and often takes joy in believing that he has beaten Zim and as for GIR…" he shuddered, "But with you it is rare. Why?"

I tried not to take insult to that.

Gaz shifted, "I chose not to waste my energy on something that doesn't help me, I guess…"

"Help you?" his antenna lifted in intrigue.

She looked as though she could have kicked herself, "Forget it."

"Why would the Gaz-human need he -"

"I said, forget it!" she snapped, bringing her knees to her chin and glaring at him threateningly.

Zim looked uneasy, like he wished for nothing more than to be on the other side of the world, or even on a different planet rather then be hearing that. But what help could she possibly need, and how was something as simple as a smile be useless? As curious and concerned as I was, it could have been nothing compared to Zim. He approached her with extreme caution and sat down next to her again, giving at least a good half a foot of space between them. Gently, he prodded her shoulder and swallowed hard.

"If the Gaz-human is in need of help; then perhaps Zim could… assist?"

She eyed him, "And why would I want you to do that and what would you have to gain from it?"

He resumed his egotistical aura, "Zim can fix anything! There is no challenge that I have not come out victorious and a simple human matter will be but mere smeet-play!" he flinched at her icy glare and backtracked, "And, believe it or not, Zim can be concerned when he feels it is necessary."

"Oh, don't tell me you see me as a _sister _figure like you do with Amy, do you?" she scoffed.

His eyes locked on hers and he forced his voice into steadiness, "No, no I do not… Little-Gaz."

They examined one another carefully. Zim tried his best to maintain his composure under her sceptic and calculating stare. When he thought that it was safe for him to do so, he shuffled a little closer; when she didn't change her stance, he took it as a sign to fully close the gap so that their arms were brushing against each other. A hint of the old Zim returned as he took it was a triumph and smiled smugly, resulting in a sharp punch to the shoulder. But he refused to move away and she didn't protest. He still looked at her questioningly, not because of the hit, but because of the previous matter at hand. Finally, she figured that he wasn't going to let it drop and spoke through gritted teeth.

"I don't care what people around me do with their time because it's theirs to waste, just like they don't take an interest in what I do, my time is my time. I don't expect anything from anyone because then there can only be room for improvement. People think I'm a stereotype, which means that they expect the same thing form me, leaving me alone in the process. So why would smiling change that?" she looked at him with an arched eyebrow, "There's nothing to fix, Zim, so thanks but no thanks. I guess it's better that way."

He looked confused by her dismissive tone. She was so blunt and made it sound like she truly didn't care. In a way, he kind of felt the same. People had labelled him as a weirdo in skool and thus expected him to be one, ignoring his strangeness and taking it as proving themselves right. He also had no care for what others did in their time, for he was Zim and that's what was important to him. But now here she was, practically forced into an explanation and he seemed… understanding to say the least. Anxiously, and curious for a reaction, he started to pat her shoulder in, presumably, a comforting attempt. Although she hardly looked like she needed it, but to him it felt like something he should do.

She tensed and started to clench her fists, but relaxed them. As much as she didn't like being touched, she figured that there wasn't anything really that bad about it at that moment. When he picked up on her tolerating him and felt like trying his luck. His arm stopped the rhythmic comforting and started to snake along her shoulders. But he swiftly resumed back to his previous action of patting gently her as she glared at him as if to say 'if you like that arm you'll keep it away from me'. So he figured that close contact was not permitted, yet little gestures were. So instead, he began to eye her hand which was on her bent knees. There was no big attempt to take it in his or to gently caress it like in those cheesy movies. Instead, all he did was simply place his own hand on top of hers. No interlacing fingers, no stroking comfort; just that as it was.

"I'm not your pet you know." Gaz said bluntly, "You don't have to treat me like one."

Zim noticed that she was not moving away, nor was she making him do so either, "To be a pet, that requires possession, ownership; Zim shall admit that it takes some imagination to picture the Gaz-human as property. Being the property _owner_ however…"

A ghost of a wry smile appeared, "Maybe." Her amber eyes studied him, "What are you doing?"

His jaw clenched, thinking that perhaps his luck really had run out and was prepared to remove his hand. But then he noticed that she was actually glancing upwards. The alien's lime complexion darkened at the sight of his own antenna tilting more openly towards her and had subtly started entwining into her violet locks. She didn't look annoyed; in fact she looked lightly questioning. Zim pulled back and smoothed the black stalks down with his free hand. He searched for an excuse.

"It is not of your concern, human!" he said, not quite grasping his usual ordering tone.

Gaz shrugged and leant back against the wall, her hair landing on his shoulder causing his feelers to go on their travels again. She seemed aware of this, but didn't give anything away, instead she allowed it. They sat in a semi-awkward silence. It was strange seeing them together like this. Zim, the loud and egotistical alien; now cautious and almost fearful in an attempt to please someone. Gaz, the strong and independent loner; now giving someone permission to be within three feet of her and looking like she was enjoying it, despite internal self-hatred for it. She twitched her hand, making him flinch his away. Her eyes rolled and her fingers pressed together into what looked like the star-trek greeting gesture and lay it back on her knee, palm upwards. Zim glanced at his own gloved, three fingered claw and took a guess at what she was doing. He returned his hand to hers, this time, due to the altered shape, their fingers interlaced.

"You are somewhat tolerable, I guess." She said coolly.

"As are you, Little-Gaz…" he furrowed his brow, "Wait, should Zim take that as a compliment?"

"Take it how you want." She shrugged, "What're you asking me for?"

"You confuse Zim…"

"It's not hard."

"You intrigue Zim." He corrected himself, he took a breath when she didn't answer and continued, "It was during a terribly awkward conversation such as this that the Dib-worm invited the Amy-human on an outing of sorts… Should Zim offer a similar proposal?"

Gaz arched an eyebrow, "Ask and find out if you should have or not."

"But, I do not wish to ask if it shall not be accepted." He snapped.

"Then you won't get an answer if you don't ask." She replied bluntly.

He growled slightly, much to her satisfaction, "You infuriate Zim!"

"Whatever…" she shrugged.

Her wry smirk caught his eye and his irritation faltered momentarily. Zim's maroon eyes studied her and he seemed to relax a little. His hand tightened a little more protectively around hers. She didn't seem to mind, but she wasn't giving any concept or signal for either to make another move. However, once again the alien felt like testing his luck. With his free hand, he gently pinched her chin to tilt it upwards to face him. Her eyes narrowed warningly, but she didn't protest. The best way to picture the scene was to describe Zim as a curious puppy who had come across a lioness. He knew it was dangerous and she was giving him plenty of warning, yet she knew that he was no threat to her and he in turn was eager to fell the thrill. Slowly, he started to lean in closer. Oh wow, I really should look away now.

All of a sudden, the sealed door slid open, making me jump. Oh crap! Dib must have hacked into the system; they couldn't see me or else they'd know I had been eavesdropping on them! It was more than my life's worth! Just as they jumped apart, I dived into the elevator. They exited and I walked towards them, pretending that I'd just arrived.

"Well, that took a while!" I announced, "You two okay?"

"Pfft! Zim is always okay!"

"Whatever." Gaz shrugged.

Dib rose up from the elevator, covered in oil marks and dust, "There, that wasn't too difficult…" he announced, brushing himself off before looking at me, "Was everything ok -"

I cut him off before he could blow my cover, "Hey, why don't we get out of here before Zim finds those you-know-what's you planted in his computer!"

"But I didn't -"

"Cursed, Dib-monkey! You dare to interfere with Zim's technology?"

"What? No not this time!"

"LIAR!" Zim cried, "You shall pay -" Gaz distracted him by opening her G.S.2 and resuming her game, he pointed quizzically, "You said the fuel cells had burned out."

She shrugged, "And?"

"And? And why did you throw it as Zim?"

"I felt like it." She smirked and started to walk out towards the elevator.

Oh it was like a soap-opera all over again. Stop her you fool! Stop her!

"Gaz-human!" he announced, making her pause but not turn around. He eyed me and Dib standing there and huffed in agitation, resuming to look at Gaz, "Will you?"

She straightened a little. Will you, he said. Sure he didn't ask the full question, and he was still scared of the answer. But he still asked. Even if he had refused to ask her directly while in the container. This was his own way of asking her out. Why did I find myself holding my breath? Gaz turned her head to glance at him. She shrugged and resumed on her way out.

"Maybe."

"You'll maybe what?" Dib demanded, following her into the elevator, "Will you what? What's a maybe, Gaz?"

I caught Zim's eye and grinned, giving him a thumbs up. His eyes narrowed dangerously, but there was a glint of a smile in there; I hoped as I hastily ran for the elevator… Gaz didn't say anything on the way out, and she sure as hell didn't give anything away expression wise. But I knew what I saw and there was no denying it. Victory for Amy! Oh wow Dib was going to flip! But calm it down, one step at a time now. But a few steps had been taken already. Zim had asked, and a… vague but still an answer, had been given. Hmmm…. I wonder where this will go…

**A/N:**

**Looks like I'll have to write more of these now, lol XD Hope you liked it and I hope I kept them in-character, they are very stubborn people to write for! Until next time and don't forget to leave requests if you like XD**


	14. Olympic Explanation

**A/N:**

**I figured with the Olympics around, why shouldn't I mention it here? Dib and Amy are given the job of explaining to Zim what the Olympics are… and why it is not a fight to the death... Set anytime after the Birthday fic.**

Dib left my side to head into my kitchen to get himself a drink. I had been given the job of babysitting my sister while mu mum had to rush into work for a few hours. Although, despite being only eight years old now, she refused to believe that she needed a babysitter. So we made a compromise. She could go into her room and pretend that she was home alone, and I would invite Dib over and pretend that I was likewise. It seemed to work as I hadn't heard a peep out of her since apart from a shuffle or a beep of a game.

"Did you watch the opening ceremony the other day?" Dib asked tiredly as he resumed his place on my sofa next to me. As was the case with 4th of July, he didn't see how people could put so much effort into an event when 'evil alien forces' were at work.

"Naturally." I grinned, "It figures though, I move out of the U.K just in time for the Olympics to move _in_."

Well, as true as that may be, I still wouldn't have been right in the middle of the fuss. The Olympics were in London this year, so I would still be in a different country; but that was besides the point. Over here everything was in a different zone. America was between five to eight hours behind Britain, so we had to wait later for anything good to happen. Still, it was fun watching the events. Especially ones like the gymnastics when all I could think of was some of the stuns Dib and Zim pulled to get away from one another. Hmmm, if there was ever an intergalactic Olympics I know two candidates already. But the swimming was my favourite, and the fencing and archery.

I noticed Dib was eyeing my front quizzically. I flicked his forehead, "Eyes up here, dude."

He blushed and widened his eyes at me, "Oh no-no-no I wasn't…" he cleared his throat, "I was just, uh, your top…"

It was a blue vest-top with the Union-Jack printed on the front graffiti-style, "What about it?"

"It's the wrong flag."

"It's not."

"You're in America." He pointed out.

I looked around and widened my eyes in pretend shock, "Really? I thought I'd taken a wrong turn somewhere!"

"Ha,ha…" he said dryly, "I mean shouldn't you wear the American flag considering the occasion?"

"I'm British. Hence I shall wear the Union-Jack for team Great Britain."

"Aren't you worried people will stare?"

"You rave about paranormal entities to anyone who will listen and those who don't; Zim is green and frequently screams his plans from the rooftops; GIR often goes in public as a green and _talking_ dog and I swear Gaz can make lightning storms when she's angry." I arched an eyebrow, "And you're worried people will stare at _me_ for wearing a different flag?"

He opened his mouth to argue, but then deflated, "Fair point."

I smirked and hooked my arm in his, "You're not embarrassed are you?"

"Well no!" he insisted, subconsciously closing the gap, "I just was thinking that you, you know, aren't a big fan of people staring at you. Not that they shouldn't stare, I mean, - What I'm saying is you wear what you want and I'll stare but – No that sounds weird! I'm not weird! Am I? Back to my point, I'm not embarrassed I was just thinking about you and you're clothes. No I didn't mean that either I just -"

I cut him off by leaning closer and planting my lips on his briefly and pulling away again. His cheeks turned a little rosier and the corner of his mouth tweaked slightly in a sheepish smile. Of course I knew what he was getting at, I had a tendency to be a little nervous when all eyes were on me, but I was getting better. It came with the job hanging around Dib and Zim all the time. But it was more fun to watch Dib squirm every now and again.

"You know there's a muscle in your neck that twitches when you babble."

He tilted his head, "My Addams-apple?"

"No, right on the side by here." I prodded a spot just under his jaw on the right, the minute my finger brushed him he tensed and snorted with laughter. He looked anxiously at me, to which I smirked and repeated the act, "Ha! Maybe you'll think twice before poking me in the ribs!"

"Oh, like this?"

Damn it! I shrieked with laughter and continued to scrabble at his jaw sending both of us into hysterics. We kept that up until a stitch was forming in my side and he was gasping. All of a sudden, there was a loud hammering on the door, making us jump. I got up and answered it only to be greeted with an irritable zipper-toothed scowl.

"Afternoon, Zimmers." I commented.

He pointed warningly at me, "How is Zim meant to discover the meaning behind all of this global entertainment if he is constantly being interrupted by infernal laughter from _you_ and your Dib-mate?"

"I don't complain when there's explosions and Irken curses from your house."

"They are necessary!"

Dib appeared at my side, "What do you want, Space-boy?"

"To demand your silence, Dib-stink! Zim is trying to figure out the meaning for the planets sudden gatherings and alliances. Pfft, not that you'll figure that out anytime soon…"

Dib and I exchanged a glance. He arched his brow, "You just told us."

"No I did not!"

"You did."

"LIAR!"

"Zim!" I interjected before this went any further, "If you want to know what's going on, all you have to do is ask."

"Zim needs no help from _humans_!" he insisted, but under that wig I could picture his antenna quirking with curiosity, "But to save valuable time Zim is clearly going to demand an explanation from you, Amy-worm!" then he noticed my top and took a step back, eyes wide, "You're collaborating with them! It's a trap!"

Dib sniggered and had to lean against the doorframe for support. I elbowed him, "I'll tell you something, I'm never wearing this thing again… Zim, calm it down, I'm not collaborating with anyone! Come in and I'll explain."

"You're inviting him in?" Dib asked, chocking on his sudden stop of laughter.

"Yes." I said simply, "He's not a vampire, Dib, he won't bite."

"No, but he _will_ claw and kick."

Zim pushed past him with a warning glare, "Only when provoked, Dib-monkey."

Oh meow… I closed the door and flicked on the TV for him where they were showing the floor gymnastics and were starting to advertise for the beach volleyball. Dib arched an eyebrow.

"The volleyball isn't too bad…"

"Men's or women's?" I challenged, seeing the women lined up in their sports bras and spandex lined up on the beach before cutting back to the rainbow of leotards skimming through the air on the beams.

He flushed, "Uh… Well, I- _ahem_, Uh…"

I copied his tone and worried expression, "_Uh… Well, I- ahem. Uh…_" I nudged him playfully, "Yeah, that's what I thought."

"Well you watch the guys swimming!"

"I like to watch you swimming too and you me, so don't complain."

He turned a deeper shade of red and Zim snapped his fingers between us, "As much as Zim loves watching the Dib flounder like a plingyowl on a nishbon; I believe there was an Earth alliance that was due for explanation?"

Dib gave him a flaming glare. To avoid a scrap in the middle of the living room, because frankly I didn't feel like explaining a crime-scene to my mum when she returned, I turned up the volume on the TV and began my explanation of the Olympics. All the while with Dib sitting on the sofa looking annoyed with his arms folded. It was actually pretty difficult going into explanation for the alien. Not the part about explaining what the Olympics were, but then he wanted to know why and how it started and the significance and how it helped to improve on Earth defences and etc…

Zim pressed his fingertips together, "So… A selection of humans from each Earth colony competes for a superior title among their kind?"

"Pretty much, you're on the right track."

"And then they are deemed suitable to join the Earth defence unit and fight to the death."

"And you've derailed…" I sighed, "No, Zim, Earth defences and death are not included. It's just friendly competition."

Dib scoffed, "Sure because he's going to understand _friendly_ competition."

"Nonsense, Dib-worm! Zim understands the pitiful term!" Zim folded his arms at the TV, "Zim had competed in similar tests in training. This is mere smeet-play."

"So do you want to watch the gymnastics?" I offered before they started fighting again.

Zim glanced at the TV with irritation, but then his expression changed. Behind his contacts, you could tell that he was slightly impressed by the achievements before him. Apart from fights with Dib, he'd never seen humans compete in such a variety of movements. The gymnasts were amazing. The bars and beams made me wince ever now and again. I'd made the mistake of watching the latest Final Destination film and as crap as it was, the death with the girl on the bars was the only plausible way to go and these people were coming a little too close to it for my liking. However, it still amazed me watching them on the floor when they leapt to impossible heights and flipped madly. What annoyed me though was the damn commentators. Every time they were saying 'oh one foot wrong there' and 'not their best show here'. Give them a break I'd like to see them have a go at this! What else was annoying me was Dib elbowing me every time U.S.A came up. I returned the gesture when Great Britain took their turn.

"Come on Team G.B!" I cried, fist pumping in the air.

"No! U.S.A!" Dib retorted.

"Victory for Irk!"

"Irk isn't even in this, lizard!"

"Not important, Dib-worm!" Zim looked at me curiously, "So when do they fight to the death?"

I deflated, "…Zim… there is no fight to the death. Friendly competition between countries, remember?"

Dib scoffed, "I said he wouldn't know what friendly competition meant."

"Friendly competition for Irkens's, Dib-smell, is when you mercifully kill your opponent after defeating them so they do not have to live with the weight of failure."

"So how come you lasted so long on your planet then, Zim?" Dib asked mockingly.

"Because I am ZIM! And ZIM does not fail!"

"You had to ask…" I sighed, then looked up again, "Hey look, the cycling results are up! Another gold for G.B, take that!"

"Well U.S.A won gold in the girls gymnasts!"

"What significance does this gold have?" Zim demanded, "Tell Zim the value of the gold!"

Was there really any need to shout? Okay, as he said, he was Zim, so what did I expect? This time Dib explained how gold was for first place, silver for second and bronze for third. It pleased the alien that the victors of the competition actually gained something. However this then led on to another little argument after a little question…

"So there is no prize after bronze?"

"No, it's just the three medals." Dib nodded, looking suspicious at the gleam in Zims eye.

"HA! The Dib fails to even get a bronze at life!"

Was that really the best he could come up with? Dib arched an eyebrow, "That was… almost an insult… Zim, you wouldn't even qualify to get in the Olympics let alone get a medal."

"And neither would you! The Amy-beast and her weak female structure would have a better chance!"

Oh no he did not! "Hey! You should see the women's boxing and judo on here, any of those girls would kick both your backsides! And so will I if you make another sexist comment."

"You call Zim sexy?" he paled, turning to Dib for help.

Dib rolled his eyes, "_Sexist!_ It means you're not being fair to the opposite gender. And she's right, any girl on the Olympics could beat you up just as easily as I could."

"Unlikely, human!"

To prove a point, I flicked the channel over to the judo arena where the women were just about to start. I'd never been a fan of TV fighting, it just looked too fake. Not as fake as wrestling but you know what I mean. Dib and I watched in mild amusement as Zim paled even further at the sight of punches being thrown and people being thrown onto the ground with force. He took a step backwards and pointed dramatically.

"What kind of worm-babies are they! Such barbaric behaviour!"

"Scared of the 'weak female structure' Zim?" Dib mocked.

"Excuse me?" I challenged.

"I was just quoting him!"

"Now who's scared, Dib-monkey?"

"Hey!" I snapped, "When did the Olympics turn into a gender battle?"

They both paused and folded their arms like a child who'd been scolded before returning to the TV. I flicked over to the swimming, but that seemed to be making Zim squirm uneasily so I flicked back to the gymnasts. Things actually seemed to be going well, until Zim just chose that he couldn't let it go.

"And for the record, no human female shall ever scare Zim."

Okay, I'll play this game, "What about Gaz?"

Dib smirked and awaited the aliens reply. Finally Zim found his words, even if he did seem a little shaded on the cheeks, "She… does not _scare_ Zim…"

Something moved out of the corner of my eye and a grinned, "Okay… but I know someone who does."

Both boys looked at me awaiting my answer, "Explain yourself, Amy-human."

"HI!"

"AGH!"

Almost on cue, my sister jumped up from behind the sofa and wrapped her arms around Zim's neck, pinning him in place, burying her face into his cheek affectionately. I swear sometimes Evie was like my own personal GIR. She just popped out of nowhere and was just as welcoming with strangeness. In fact she was attracted to it. Well, she was attracted to Zim to be specific. Zim shrieked and took part in spinning around in circles trying to dislodge the girl who latched on like a vice.

"What trickery is this?"

"Hi love-pig!" she giggled, quoting a term she'd heard him use before.

Dib clasped a hand over his mouth as he snorted with laughter, He looked at me with an approving glint, "You know, I've always liked your sister."

"Funny." I muttered, "Zim's always likes _yours_."

"What was that?"

"Nothing!" both I and Zim chorused, mine casual his desperate.

Evie grinned, "Have you come to watch the swimming with me?"

"Uh…" Zim pointed dramatically at the window, "Behold, a pork-cow… thing!"

Why did _I _look? Dib shook his head pityingly at me as I face-palmed. Evie who was young enough to get away with it, glanced over as Zim jumped form her grasp and desperately charged at the door. From the window I could just make out his figure heading back into his house. Ah well, he had the information he needed and he even managed to sit with us for a while with little damage. I considered that a success! Dib arched an eyebrow.

"You know he's going to try and plan something for the next Olympics now, right?" his eyes widened, "Maybe he'll try and enter and infiltrate the system! Or maybe he'll create and army of athlete robots to gain mind control! Or perhaps -"

"He'll end up watching them with us again and asking the same questions after forgetting about them for four years?" I offered.

He gave a half-smile and shrugged, "Maybe…"

Evie came and deliberately sat in between Dib and I to finish watching the event with us. I noticed she was cheering for both U.S and Britain which to be honest, I didn't mind. America was part of out lives now, it was our home, why shouldn't we cheer for it too? Finally, Evie looked at me sceptically.

"Amy? Don't you think people will stare if you wear that top?"

Dib sniggered, "Yeah, I really do like your sister."

She held up a palm to shush him, "Sorry, I'm taken."

Now it was m turn to laugh as I gave her a high-five, "Yeah… I like her too."


End file.
